Fourteen months ago I was on an operating table.

I need to share with you what happened this year.Not because I have it all figured out. But because I’ve been walking around asking myself how does that happen and I think I finally know.Fourteen months ago I had a mastectomy. A small, dark time. Scary in ways I won’t minimize. And yet, lying there before surgery, I had this belief. Not a wish. A belief. That I was going to beat this. That I was going to love my new body. That I was going to get a tummy tuck out of the deal, go to Paris, go to Scotland, attend art retreats in Idaho, and celebrate turning 70 in the most beautiful way I could imagine.I just got back from Scotland.I beat breast cancer.And I leave for Paris on Wednesday.How does that happen?Here’s what I believe: I set my expectations big. Really big. Expansive capacity. I let myself want what I actually wanted, not a smaller, safer version of it. And then I matched my energy to that belief.I think when most of us are about to try something new, something scary, something that matters we instinctively set our expectations low. We do it to protect ourselves from disappointment. From failure. And I get it. That makes complete sense.But here’s what happens when we match your energy to those low expectations. And maybe we don’t fail. Maybe we don’t get hurt. But we also don’t get the thing you actually wanted. That big, beautiful, best thing? We never even give it a real chance.I’m not special. Not in any way that makes me immune to hard things. This year had obstacles. In January, after I was declared cancer-free, I bled on the table during reconstruction and had to be transfused. I got an infection. I’m scheduled for my fifth revision surgery when I get home from Paris.There were hard days. There were scared days.But I never gave up on the big belief. Beat breast cancer. Live another 30 years. Draw on the streets of Paris.I kept coming back to it. Again and again.What’s the belief you’ve been keeping small?I’m not asking so you’ll share it with me, though you can. I’m asking because I want you to feel the difference between a belief that protects you from disappointment and a belief that actually has room for what you want.Your creative practice. Your art. The work you keep circling. What would it look like to believe in it — really believe in it — and match your energy to that?Don’t shrink what you want so you don’t have to feel the disappointment of not getting it. Expand. Set the belief so big that your energy has no choice but to rise to meet it. And when obstacles come and they will come you walk through them. You face them. You don’t give up on the belief.I’ll be in Paris later this week, drawing in the streets.I’ll keep sharing from there. Because these beliefs create things.I’ve seen it.I’m living it.And so can you.With love,Lynn This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit lynnhardin.substack.com/subscribe