[Free Patreon Ep] World's Greatest With Jason & Tully

Hey everybody, this is the Jason Ellis Show with Tully, a Patreon Show. We do two of those a week. I also do a solo show called Awesome World on Patreon. Patreon.com.

Slash Ellis, mate. If you would like to subscribe, it's less than a dollar a day even if you're a Canadian. So sign up and join us. Also, I do a separate show by myself that is a podcast, exclusively a podcast, that you can actually catch the live recording of that podcast on the Patreon, which would make Patreon four shows a week, Patreon.

That podcast is called Jason Ellis Show 2.0. King Remember Beep. I want to get one of those backpacks that has a window in the back for cats, but it's like, they're not cheap. And I have a funny feeling that he'll be like, cool, now let me out.

And I'll be like, well that's cool. Now I have the Gaze backpack ever, which wouldn't be the first time in my life I've had the Gaze backpack ever, but I'm trying to be good with money. Hello? Hello?

Hello? This is Sophia with- Hi Sophia, how are you? I'm good. That's great.

I'm a bit busy right now. The shock is attacking me. Ah! She acted like she was your friend, but I don't think she really cared.

You're good with that stuff. You're so? I'm a bit of an empath. Right, that's the word that you use a lot to me.

I always have been. You're all- nah, just very empathic, which is for sure English. Have you ever seen the color of the wind? What are the hoods, really?

Yeah, man. Have you ever seen the color of the wind? You know that, huh? No, I'm just- Oh, that's a song.

Is it? Yeah. It doesn't go like that though. Have you ever seen the color of the wind?

Wait, who said that? Two people probably. The chick who voiced Pocahontas in the movie of that name by Disney. And then, you know what they would do in those days.

They still do it, but they get pop hits out of having- Usually Vanessa Williams re-recorded. She did a couple of those. I think she did Beauty and the Beast. Isn't that funny?

She was Beauty and now she's Beast. Vanessa Williams? I haven't seen her yet, but I'd still- She's a fat bitch. I bet I used to fuck.

I bet I'd still slanger someone. Oh, I holler at your boy. Yeah, I'd definitely get in there. I don't care at all who's saying colors of the wind.

I want to see the decrepit Vanessa Williams is going to fantasize about having sex with. I think you. Yeah, I'm telling you, she's fine. You know what I mean?

Good luck. That's like, yeah sure. Then you can already tell us that I blow up. Yeah.

I bet I know. Because I'm still all the way in. Yeah, well, yeah. I love- I don't know exactly when I passed the threshold where like that woman, when I was a kid, would look at she was wearing a dead skin mask and now I'm just like, no, she looks like a sexy one in baseball mid.

Which is hot. To me now? Yeah. I'm almost certain now.

Okay. I think, you know, because she- That's the one she was. Really? I don't recall that.

Maybe she was just in the building. That would make a lot of sense. I can search her. I've definitely seen her live and uncut.

Because I think she was pretty- Fat. Careful. County. About.

So I see that she was potentially available for interviews once or twice. She'd get her on now. Yeah. She, I'm sure she would be- Hey, why so fat?

Can we get her here by the end of this show? It's gonna be tough to be so hot and in so fat. She, you know, she- I don't mind. I think it's cool to be fat.

She managed to- I think about doing it. Oh yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's been fun, but- Fuck it, you know.

It's hard though, you know. Man, you know what's crazy is donuts right? You know how I look really like donuts? I do not.

I'm like an empath or donuts. I just had bananas with almond butter and honey on it. Yeah. And it was as good, if not better.

Why are you pulling me up? I just typed in the fact that I was to see what would come up. Don't do that, dude. That could do something where they could throw me off the deep end.

I'm still recovering from being sick, so fuck off. They don't come in like the right package. You have to cut them up and make it. You have to wash a dish.

Something about being served candy on a platter. It's- it's- I had one donut last night after the comedy. So I think I bought 24 donuts for everybody and not everybody. Eight donuts.

So I gave donuts to basically almost everybody in the audience. Right. Because that's how many people came to the show. Also, I felt good about it though because the- Jeremiah Watkins was like, yeah, man, like right now, sell tickets.

He's like, if you sold this many tickets in this room, that's good. Yeah. And I was like, why? Why?

And he's like, baseball. I'm like, what? He's like, well, obviously the- the money situation for everybody is tight. So people are not going out as much.

It's Tuesday night. And the Dodgers are doing good. People are watching it. They're not going out.

And he's like, really? He's like, my show does- he's stayed up on the spot kills. Yeah. He's like, the last show he did was like 10 times harder to fill the room than any other time.

He's like, because baseball is roaring right now. LA has Dutch. In LA. So LA people are like, I didn't even go on coming.

I didn't want to know if I can get it. So there goes that. Which made me feel good about it. But also learning experience.

I think that might have been the first time I have put on a show where I ran the whole thing and was the host and was like timing it out and booking guests and the whole idea of like a war stories where you kind of- because at first it was like, I was going to have mayhem on and some other like fighters. And then I like realized, you know, you're giving people spots that don't really do comedy. Yeah, a little of that tends to go a long way. Right.

And there's all these people that you know. That's the other thing I noticed. Jason Allison, friends at the Comedy Store, makes me look cool to comedians. Comedians are in my DMs this morning.

Yeah. People are texting me. People that don't talk to me are now talking to me. Because they think that I might be able to give them a spot.

Stage time, yeah. Yeah, which is great. I guess, you know, like it's a weird world to be in all of a sudden. Because it's like, well, I do.

I mean, if I could, if I had the power, I would give everybody I know stage time. Of course. But if I give everybody stage time that doesn't bring one person to the Comedy Store, then there's nobody at the Comedy Store to watch it. And then I would get to do it ever again.

Yes. So it's kind of, you know, like I would love to give everybody, you know, like really my friends of comedy are the ones that don't get anybody there. I know. You know, like, okay, Steph Tull of gets people there.

Steph Tull of an I, we know each other. She doesn't give a fuck what Jason does. Like, and I think she's amazing. But it's more, you know, the people that I know, I'm very lucky that I'm friends with Chappelle and Jeremy, but you know, the last minute Tuesday, eight o'clock show, not an easy room to fill, not a good time slot.

But this is, this is the game. Like if you do Jason Ellis is like, headlining around the country, guess what? They're giving me a Thursday, dude. You know, they give you do one in the city, New York City.

No, wait, really? What day? Friday? Oh, wow.

Friday? What time? Six o'clock and I'm like, oh, well, yeah, they're giving you, who the fuck is this guy? Wait, you're headlining?

Oh, yeah, you can have this spot. You bitch, you know, that's until you're TikTok famous, or you're, you're 20 years in the game, which is like, you know, hey, everybody, everybody, the thing with arthritis is like, that's gonna be my fucking special. When I'm finally filling out the fucking audience, I'll be fucking dead in a wheelchair just like that. But you should get your mask thing that you've always talked about and you're giving me, you should be Darth Rightis.

Oh, okay, so it's not over. Darth Rightis. I feel like I'm just like, you're like, oh, dude. Two chicks walked into a box.

Shh. Did he always breathe quite that heavy? That's not herpes. That's enough.

Uh, text messages from yesterday, that's convenient. Lethal weapon, blabadi bla. Where's Will? Would you need him on the wheelchair?

Will, Will just DM'd me on Instagram. Yeah, I'd have you both at me the other day. That's nice. He actually emailed me like a week ago when I've been shining.

He loves email. I just haven't, he does, he sort of, he's sort of an empath when it comes to him. He's about ready for that mask. But yeah, he just, that thing I was listening to was making fun of Morrissey's autobiography.

The only reason why I bothered to click on it is because Will, Will just popped in there. Yeah, Mel Gibson was trained by the Gracie's who gives a shit. That's a sweet shirt. Ellis, thank you.

Yeah, Lucy Block gave it to me. Lucy Block sent me all Ken Block t-shirts, Ken Block DC shoes, which they're like the ones, they're similar to the ones that are like, when I was on DC, like they're big puffy ones. Mm-hmm. And it's, because I'm older, am I?

Yeah. Right. I think it was a time they were like, I'm like, I'm like him. It's cool to have your friend shit.

Oh, yeah. I love representing my dead friends. Crazy that you can just say that sentence. I know, right.

It's like all my best friends are dead. Is that a song? Yeah, it's Turbo Negro. It's okay.

Yeah. No, that was all my friends are dead. Yeah. And then there's the song People Who Died.

It's a good song. Is that them again? No, that was this guy Pete Carroll. Oh, the people that died died.

There's the people who died in school, track, see he's the guy, member of the Leo movie, The Basketball Diaries. Yeah. It was about him. Yeah.

There was some interesting show happening in New York. Some interesting cats running around late 70s, early 80s. Yeah, and it was interesting. That's interesting now.

No, but that's when it was fucking diesel. But somebody's going to go, it goes full circle. It does. It needs to get shitty.

So the lame people move out, so only the strong survive. Yeah. And then it can get, that's happening. And that can get cool.

I mean, kind of. It's not happening, but it is shit. Yeah. So far so good.

Yeah. Yeah. Nothing. It is shitty, but it is infiltrated with gay.

Yeah. But I'm saying, I mean, the weak. Yeah. Yeah.

The TikTok. Yeah. Yes. Yes.

Yeah. Homos splice it up. Dude, I swear to god, that hit me so hard. I think I think I said this.

You've been out by Homosexual. I have been. Mm. Maybe twice.

Um, I think I mentioned this. We went to this museum, The Broad, and they had all the Andy Warhol stuff. And I'm like, all due respect. But all he was really doing was it was the first time straight people saw gay shit.

And they were like, oh, wow. Like fuck shit. And it's like, dude, they just got a whole different take on things. It's fun.

It is fun. Yeah. Yeah. It's like punk rock.

It's fun. Yeah. But then when you like wear a punk rock t-shirt, you ruin it. Oh my god.

My neighbors are still fucking living. Like it's living in Levita, 1979. And it's just like, this like fucking now I'm going to spike my hair and bleach the sides. And it's like, seriously guys, we're still doing this?

You can't have a house and be punk. No. And that's why we refer to them as the punk rock townhouse. Right.

Just fuck you. I've seen your dad pull up in an Audi. Dude, you got a dad. You got a dad.

Fuck off. I think he likes you. Yeah. That automatically disqualifies you.

The thing is I know their house is the same as mine. And there's a lot of them living there. And it's this guy. And he's got this like fat punk chick.

They're like that. They're like fat little like they're like grown up punk rock ewoks. Yeah. I love ewoks.

I live there. There's only the ewoks. Yes. There's our basements.

They see cool songs. Yeah. Well, the original song is not so well. No, no, no.

You have to go to the one that replaced it with this shitty one. Yeah. You have to be one of my favorites. Yeah.

Yeah. So anyway, if these two, would you fucking ewok? If you lived in the ewok village, and you're never going back here in the space, they're in planet. They got a planet, right?

Uh, they seem to be the only sentient inhabitants of the moon of Endor. I love Endor. Um, I die. I hope I go to Endor and become an ewok.

I don't think I'm a fat ewok. I think that ewoks would- That's my time to be fat. Even if they pretended they were cool with it, they would resent me if I fucked their joke. But if you are an ewok, if you die and go back, if you come back as an ewok.

Well, of course, if I don't ewok. Right. You think they got big penises? No.

But on the scale of ewok penis, it's girthy. Yeah, no. Which is probably not to ask good, but it's still accepted in the ewok community. Yeah, I would say it's short but girthy.

But we're just saying that. It's hard to pump. Because we're projecting- I like long strokes. I feel like if I'm an ewok, I'm just going to have to get into short strokes.

Yeah. I like to have sex like I'm bowing a violin. Right. Yeah.

I'm more of a double bass. I'll let you boy. Stupid. I hate big big jokes.

Trying not to hate myself though. I've got to be positive. I was worried about selling this store out last night and then I saw a thing. This TikTok or maybe it's Instagram, I can't say anything.

Um, it's like a basketball analogy. It was like, you're worried about winning. You're worried about losing. You know, when you're about to compete or you're trying to do something, the main objective is that you're ready and you have fun doing it.

And you, um, you learn from the experience. Try to, you know, learn as much as you can from the experience while enjoying yourself. And then there's less to be stressed about. And it was a good time for that to happen.

Because I was, you know, I was like, I'm not going to sell it out, you know. And then I was like, well, you know, I did learn a lot. You know, the line up, the timing, how many people you would have for that amount of time. I was like, oh, wow.

Good thing. Dude, I almost had Tom Arnold. Tom Arnold was coming to do the show. And I was like, I can't believe he's messaging me.

That's crazy that he's even messaging me back. And he was like, oh, war stories. Yeah, I got a couple. And I was like, yeah, you do.

Right. I mean, this is great. And then when the way the timing went, everything, I was like, it's not this, that's not going to work. Like if another person shows up, I was going to give Ashley Johnson a spot.

I'm like, there's no, like, it barely like, Steph told of ended. And I was like, thank you, everybody. Bye. So it didn't, it didn't work out for me to have anybody extra.

But now I know the people that I had on, like now I would have one less. Yeah. Because that whole bum rush for time and. Especially since the eight o'clock show, because there's somebody coming in at 10.

Yeah, the battle, Rose Battle's coming in. I got it. It's a hard out 9.45. And I was like, I don't want to, it's my first time.

I don't want to be the dick that goes long. Dude, I remember Rose Battle was just blowing up, like I'd just gotten on TV and we would have that slot. And Sam would be like, we'd have like five people in the crowd. And Sam would be like, I'm just going to let this guy go.

And they're like, Sam, no, Rose Battle is starting. I'm like, Sam, no, Rose Battle. It's fine. It's fine.

I'm just like, okay, nobody knows who I am. So I can't really get in trouble over this. But yeah, you got to get the fuck out of there. Their crowd is waiting at the door.

Your crowd doesn't exist. Yeah, well, I don't think I didn't see that crowd waiting at the door. I definitely think even the main room, because I stayed and watched in the main room, it wasn't a good night for the comedy store. Wow.

Because usually, right? Like they do well during the week. I don't know if every tourist is hip to this, but like the national people are there Tuesday, Wednesday, because that's when they're not on the road. Yeah, it wasn't.

It wasn't packed. But dude, I got to say everybody 85% of the people in the crowd were my personal friends. Mm-hmm. And I was like, you know, you get dark.

You know, I have any friends. I'm like, dude, yeah, you do. You know, like, Butterballs came, shout out to you, Butterballs. Oh, that's great.

If I could champion by himself. He's driving, he's ass off, driving, delivering, or whatever. I was mainly sleeping. He's like, I had to calm him up.

I did by himself. Jasper came. Really? I haven't seen him for the longest time ever.

I'm like Jasper doing. Good. What's he doing? Working his ass off, being a dad.

Yeah. Mad kids popping out all over the place. Oh, good. Yeah.

Then he, you know, he got a holster, bro. That's a blast girl came. Oh, cool. Yeah.

Yeah. It was cool. And then some sober friends from my meetings game. That was really cool.

You know, Josh came, of course. But yeah, it was cool to see people that I know in the crowd. And that was a good look for me. You know, because even Jeremy was like, dude, room's almost full.

Right now, this time, it's good. Yeah, great. I was like, OK, cool. But it was very funny.

I had a very good time with the Steph Taliban. And I love Steph and I loved Shappelle Lacy did a, because I was like, you don't have to do a war story. Right. But if you want to, it'd be cool.

And Shappelle was talking about the first time he had sex. And I was like, it's not really a war story. But then we started telling him, I was like, yeah, yeah. No, it is accounts.

Yeah. And it was super funny. So I was laughing the whole time. And I just.

Well, I mean, it's the Wolf, Jason. Oh, it's 2.0, greatest podcast in the history of podcasting. Way bigger than Logan Paul. Let's talk about Mando.

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Hey everybody, it's the Wolf, Jason Ellis 2.0. 54 years of age jacked, very sexy. A lot of people always comment dang, how did you get so sexy? Because I eat right.

I sleep good. I do all the things that you're supposed to do to be a healthy person. And when you get to my age, if you don't do them, you're going to know real quick. So if you're trying to get in shape, and you're a very busy person, you're doing a lot of things, maybe you're trying to be jacked.

Maybe you're trying to be a 54-year-old professional skate boarder pro fighter. Those are dumb decisions. But I do them, and I do them well. Because I use tempo.

It's if you're in a hurry, you need food. You got to have sustenance. So it tries tempo meals. They've got all different kinds of meals.

And they're all good for you. And you get to choose from a variety of different flavors, taste and whatnot. And they're all good. And you can eat them and not feel guilty.

And just throw the plastic thing in the trash and go about, taking care of your kids or doing a kick flip, whatever it is. For a limited time, tempo is offering my listeners 60% off. Your first box, dang, man. They've basically given it to you.

Go to tempo meals.com slash Ellis. Use my code. Let them know. Be healthy.

Be fit and sexy. Like Shaboi. It worked out really good. I feel like with a sound mind.

I've done events. I don't think I really pay attention. At this time, I was really paying attention. I was like, oh, wait, you can do this.

You can do that. Oh, wow. There's this and this and that. And I'm like, man, the only, you know, the hardest thing about it is like being in it.

You can't get in it. They don't let you in. It's like if I was in, you know, that's that's why I know. Like, you know, I'm not.

I will admit one part. There's a guy I stayed later. And there's a guy that I'm. Zach knows I'm not really a fan of this particular comedian.

And he came up afterwards. And he's pretty big man. He's like a new guy. Everyone loves him.

I got that dude. He talks like I fucking destroy that guy. And he's paid regularly. He fucking shows up.

And he's jointed. So I'm trying to shoot him. It's any matter of time, man. And then when I get to be a person that goes there all the time, so I'm doing sets all the time, I'm going to fucking annihilate, man.

I'm going to I'm going to get really, really good at this. Not annihilate people annihilate the game. I'm going to be good at comedy, you know, like everything I did last night. I don't it's not a joke.

I just made them all up right there. And some of them were I was like, oh, no, I could use that. Yeah. So I would imagine because a lot of people do those like, you know, like those team shows of, you know, don't just do your stuff, do this or do that.

Like, imagine how many people get bits out of. Oh, yeah, I never thought of using that story before. But I put it together for that guy's thing and all of a sudden, right? That's a joke.

Yeah. And I think Steph did some stuff that she didn't usually do work. Like, holy shit, she's so good at it. Yeah.

It was really impressive. But if I had one donut and I felt sick and I was like, I think I'm done. I think I'm done with the it's like a symbol of cheating or so. It's like my last thing, you know, like when things get stressed, I'll have a donut.

Right. And it's in a mic. I don't feel very good after it. Right.

I think maybe because I'm recovering still. So it's like super noticeable. But I was like, I had one and in the car on the way home, I was like, man, is that from that one donut? That's crazy.

And then, uh, she was just making me some shit before I came in here. I was like, I'm still hungry. And I'm like, that, that was, I remember the donut I had last night. And I just had bananas with fucking almond butter and honey on it.

I'm like, there's nothing wrong with that. That's just pure fucking fuel. Right. And it's fun.

Yeah. It just doesn't come in a thing. You can hold with your hand and it doesn't like dance for you. Like it's an old glittery and like donuts.

I got this thing where it's just like a convenient handheld fucking sugary snack. For sure. There's probably somebody in town who would dress up something like that. And like there's enough people who are like vegan crunchy crazy.

I mean, if you're making a toast, then it's more, you can hold it. It's similar to a donut. But I don't think bread, you know, you're going to get different bread because the most of the bread these days is bullshit. But even like selling it in a little, like even selling it in a little individual, like plastic thing, like a little tiramisu or a little pudding.

Somebody out there is doing it. Right. Yeah, but we don't, you just got to find them and you got to be willing to pay like five times as much as that. There's the big, that you ain't paying.

I'm not paying 10 bucks for banana, dude. Exactly. And somebody would be, would somebody would charge you that with a straight face? For sure.

Fucking crazy. Yeah. No, everything is, I feel like, I don't know, it seems like everything food-wise has gone up. I don't think that's your imagination in the slightest.

Because it just seems like 30 is the new 20. Because I've been recovering. I'm like, not cooking as much because I'm like on the couch and I'm like, oh, I just really get all the food. Yeah.

And I go to order it. And then I see the price and I go, I was going to make something. I know. It's like, you know, like I want to soup and it's like 20 bucks.

And I'm like, wait, it's just a soup. I know. And it's like from a shitty Thai place where it's like, you got a shitty Thai place. It's not very good like meat and vegetables, but it's cheap.

Yeah. Now it's not. Now I'm like, wait, did I, did I accidentally click on like some super fancy fusion Thai food? Like, no, man, it's street Thai.

And I saw a thing today, a bunch of people were making the same comment and they were like, oh, we must all watch the same YouTube video. So I'm just regurgitating a YouTube thing that may or may not be true. But apparently there's also this phenomenon of, because yeah, inflation, things are getting more expensive. They were getting more expensive and they have not stopped getting more expensive.

And people are certainly not making. Teriffs. If anything, they're making less money that it's not just that in the restaurant, like the restaurant can't, I felt so bad. Like our Mexican place that was our like, it's not the greatest, but it's in our neighborhood.

And that's our place we go and we're just want something easy that we all like for dinner. Like the price is like doubled. And it's like, I don't think this guy is making twice as much money. I think he was losing money at the old prices.

So like I'm sympathetic, but I'm not paying $60 for tacos. And so supposedly you're getting squeezed two different ways now where the restaurants know you don't want to pay those prices. They're seeing less people coming. And so they're also using cheaper and shittier ingredients and raising the prices.

Because that's the only way they have a profit margin. Yeah. I know, I don't know if I said this here, a friend of ours has a friend who's made her living for a decade, two decades as like a professional freelance concierge. Just like, cool.

Machine Gun Kelly wants to go to that restaurant. He calls her for a fee. He gets in and she's like, I don't have any work nowadays because everybody can get a table everywhere. Because it's not busy.

Nobody. You don't need to have the person that pulls the string. There's a table available tonight at the fan. Not to say the fancy place is empty.

Just it's just not, yeah, which, which to them, that's like cutthroat stuff. Like if you're not selling it out, you probably got the amount of money. It cost a run the fucking thing. Dude, if you're if a restaurant's not packed on Friday and Saturday night, they're fucked.

Right. Even if they're packed on Friday and Saturday night, they might still be fucked. But you got it. You got it.

And I know like my wife had some stress. I know you could be like a calm guy, you're a businessman or lady or whatever. And you're you know, you're done there. It's like an eyes or whatever.

And every Friday, Saturday, every day, every week, you're just like, you know, yeah. And how much shit is your chef throwing away? How do you get the buying? You know what I mean?

Like there's this shit that I like to buy these are called calamari steaks and they're fucking awesome. I fried some last night. They're so fucking good. It's not the tentacles.

It's like the body. And I they don't always have them. And I asked the guy and he's like, I nobody wants them but you I end up throwing half of them away. And I was like, oh, that's a lot of people don't know what to do with it.

You know, but you don't think about that. That's your grocery store. You're like, oh, that's a pretty good part. Why are they charging so much?

I always remember my friend runs a really nice restaurant in New York and he's like, they go, man, your string beans look so amazing. How do you get these strings? And he's like, because I buy twice as many as I need and I throw away all the ones that don't look good and I give you all the good looking ones and you pay double because you paid for the ones I threw away to. That's how I do it.

I bought donuts last night late before I went to the company store and I got 24 and there's no way they were about to close. Yeah. And they were all ready to be eaten. Yeah.

And that's like, yeah, that's their money down the drain. Yeah. I don't know. Running a restaurant is so stressful.

I really like my wife and I kind of, it's got to be the hottest things. It's like one day. Yeah. No, my wife and I kind of have joke half serious about one day.

We get some little like lunch and I make sandwiches and she makes soup and it's like, I always say the only way that I would do it is if it can, I don't say we can afford for it to go out of business, but we can afford for it to not make money because it's not fun otherwise. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I don't know how you win it's just like you can't get money from an employer. You can't go and do your own thing, but then there's a lot of people that are, there's not a lot of people with a lot of money to spend and there's a lot of people that are trying to separate them from their dollars. It's a crazy time. Yeah.

It's only getting crazier too. I saw protests on TikTok some old guy yelling at some other guy and calling him the F bomb because you know, one side's, if you're liberal, you're gay and the other guy was, you know, calling him the F bomb because he's not liberal. Right. And he said like, you know, you're a bitch or something that gave that dude the right to spring off for him and he was, you must have been intoxicated or maybe like he drove a rev force up like that but he fell by himself and like, he's head on the ground and like, like, look like, he really hurt himself.

He's got funny. Yeah. He picks himself up and he keeps chasing and I was like, man, being a pro, being out of protest is gay. Like, I mean, like, I don't care what side you're on, you're not getting laid.

It's not a sexy pastime. And for me, it made me realize it's like big daddy, J.S. Cakes is all about that pussy. You know what I'm saying?

24 seven. What's up, ladies? Where's the be that? That's what I'm about.

I'm about the Puss and the Puss knows how that your boy, big daddy Puss cakes, look at some beef on the streets, street beef. That's what I'm at. That's what's up. It's on a protest.

If you protest, there's no Puss. And if you protest, then Puss doesn't want you and there's more Puss for me. Hala. I'm not that tough.

Yeah. So I got my priorities in order. Yeah. I remember when I was a kid, you know, my dad and I went, pop bowl was running for president and it was two o'clock.

I'm double-eater. Yep. And he was making some appearance in the middle of the night and we drove down there just to like see the guy who might be president in person because it was 10 minutes from our house. And I remember a guy showed up, he was appearing at a fucking diner for five minutes at two in the morning and some guy showed up at the Clinton sign.

And I remember as we were like, okay, there was Bob Dolls go back to the car and go to bed, somebody like grabbed the sign from the guy and he tried to hold on to it. The guy's trying to throw it to the ground. It's just like, this is, even as a kid, I was like, this is a personal issue. It's got nothing to do with fucking Medicare for all or lower taxes.

It's got, you know, when you're hardcore on something, it's troublesome. Yeah. Yeah. And when you really love something or a person, you don't know them.

Right. It's troublesome. No, it's just, there's a certain kind of obsessive personality. And I think that you would find that whoever's super fixated on this, that used to be super fixated on some other thing.

They're also super fixated on some other thing. It's just people who get really, really, you know, parasocialist. I guess the word we use nowadays more for like influencers and YouTube and podcasts and stuff where it's like, you know, you don't know the person, but you're really wrapped up in their life. It's almost like you, it's almost like a social relationship, but it's parasocial.

Yeah. You know, like you have attached a lot of your personality to this party or this politician or whatever. But when I say things are crazy, you know, really getting crazier, I'm not even sure that the challenge is that we're facing our things that any politician of either side can really do anything about. It's like my chick's company, right?

Like when they know that they need something, they're just, they're, they're mo is, can I, can I do it? And if no, can we hire somebody overseas that can do it, you know, remotely? No. Okay.

Fuck. We can hire somebody. That's just not the way that it was in my parents' generation. Those, the option A and option B did not exist.

And so it was always option C. We'll get some gay, we'll get some girl. And now you're the third option. And you know, that's the way that is.

In happier news, animals. They're cool. They're super fun. But what if they could talk and weren't insanely stupid?

I'll make no mistake. I've said it before. I'll say it again. The dumbest person you have ever met is smarter than the smartest dog you have ever met.

It is just a fact. But if they weren't, if they were just more like dumb guy, like, loveably dumb guy, level intelligent, and they could talk, what kind of animal would be the most fun kind of animal to hang out and do drugs with? Wednesday, who is the greatest of all? The greatest Wednesday, who's the greatest of them all?

This generation's Jeopardy theme music. Yeah. Thank you. Well, I love horses.

But they're big and they break stuff. I feel like if they were in the house all the time, they would wreck stuff. So there's like, they take a dookie. Dang, dude.