How deep the Father's love for us, How fast beyond our measure, That he should give his only son, To make a righteous treasure, How great the pain of searing laws, The Father turns his face away, As wounds which modern shows and want, Bring many sons to glory, He holds a man upon a cross, My sin upon his shoulders, A shame that he my mocking-boots, Called out among the snafers, It was my sin that held him there, Until it was accomplished, His dying breath has brought me. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to the vlogcast. How do you feel about Jesus? I am the average Joe Boo of average Joe's Media, I think I am trying to simulcast this on both pages, How do you feel about Jesus and average Joe's Media?
I don't know if it is, fantastic. Today, I was going to do something yesterday, And it took me about an hour or two to set today's stuff up, And then when the children are here, It pretty well made me run into dinner time, So I cut it off, cut off the creating of this video, And had everything that I did, And made dinner and kind of called it a night. So today, after work, after everything, Everything around the house, everything, Everything that was doing, I said it's time to sit down and take care of this. Friendship, friendship is what I want to talk about today.
And I want to talk about this because about five years ago, Four or five years ago, I had a conversation with my oldest daughter, And I was probably really, I don't know, Crossing those lines between what a daughter wants to hear from her father. Just from a standpoint of, I don't know how the conversation came up, But I was like, how many friends do you have at school? And she told me, she said she had a lot of people that follow her on Instagram Or whatever, I don't know what she had. Terrible, terrible parenting.
But she told me she had a lot of people that follow her and watch her and comment And they chat back and forth on whatever little app she had. And so I was like, that's not what I'm asking. That's not the question. How many friends do you have?
How many people did you call them right now? They pick up. How many people right now, if you ask them to come over and hang out, Spend the night, how many would say yes, how many would drop what they're doing In order to hang out with you? Or, you know, hey, let's make plans, come on, bring it on.
And so, anyway, so the big question that I have is friendship. What is friendship? What does the Bible have to say about friendship? Or what can we infer, I guess, is the word that when the Bible talks about Being a friend or talks about behavior of a Christian or whatever, how does that apply to friendship in any way, shape, or form?
So what I want to do is just kind of look at a few basic things and then go into a few things about friendship and what it requires. So first, Galatians 6-2, we're supposed to bear one another's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ. It is not friendship. If you cannot bear the burden that someone else has, If you can't at least try to share it, help them, relieve a little bit of that burden, Then you can't qualify yourselves in that being in that friend.
Most of the time, bearing somebody else's burden is just listening to them whenever they have an issue, whenever they have something going on. They want you to just hear them out so they can vent. Most of the time, venting allows whoever has the issue to kind of reset, settle down, And then just be able to approach it a different way. That's how we generally bear one another's burdens nowadays.
But there's a whole lot of other things that you can do. Galatians 6-2, doing that fulfills the law of Christ. 1 John 4-7, Beloved, Let us Love One Another, For Love is a God and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. I've told you all every time that I get on here that a central theme of this podcast, vlogcast, these videos is love and it's hard to do anything else unless you possess and exhibit love.
Therefore comfort each other and edify one another just as you also are doing. First, that's Lones 5 or 11. Build one another up, comfort one another, help one another, support one another, support. I know on average, Joe's Media, I think you don't care about what we do as we say support those you know.
And that's because we're told to do that. That's because that's what we would want somebody to do for us. I don't know if that verse is in there, but in Matthew the Golden Rule, how you want someone treating you, you should be treating them. Matthew 19 on your father and mother and you should love your neighbor as yourself.
Most of the time people think that our neighbor is just literally our neighbor, but generally speaking the word neighbor is someone near you and it can be near you at any time. So when I'm at the store, people are in line around me. I'm supposed to love them, show love to them, be loving, not hateful. Hebrews 10, 24 to 25 and let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaken the assembling of ourselves together as is the man of some, but exhort one another and so much more as you see the day approaching.
This context generally is used for why you shouldn't miss church because the Bible in Hebrews 10 tells you not to miss church. Generally speaking, however, the purpose of this is when we do get together, build another up. We're not to forsake the assembling of ourselves together because we're supposed to do good to all people, especially those in the household of faith. And so when the household of faith assembles, you shouldn't forsake it.
That's what this verse is saying. However, in that assembling, we were to consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, exhort one another. That's outside of praising God, outside of worshiping God, outside of singing, praying, learning from the Bible and all that stuff that goes on with worship. Outside of that, this is the purpose for us to get together.
This is the purpose because we are to build one another up. And when we do that, we build the body of Christ. I believe that's in the Bible as well. I don't know this specific verse.
And then this is the biggest one to me. I'm going to use this one again later, but Proverbs 18 verse 24, a man who has friends must himself be friendly. But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. So, Proverbs has a lot to say about things that can be applied today.
Like the first 10 chapters of Proverbs, a lot of it talks about adultery. Maybe the next 10 chapters talks about the wise, the fools being friends. The last bit, I'm kind of getting off on maybe the extent of my knowledge of Proverbs, but there's a lot of good applicable. What do I do in a situation like this direction in Proverbs?
But I mean, right there, the first part of that sentence, a man who has friends must himself be friendly. You can't possess a friend. You can't possess a friend is probably the wrong word, but you can't have friends. And you not be friendly.
It's got to work both ways. There can't be some kind of a double standard where you expect them to answer your phone call, but when they call you, you're not going to answer. There can't be that double standard, and so you yourself have got to be friendly. And then when you look at some of the verses in Proverbs, which we will, about what a brother is there for, there is a friend that is closer than a brother.
And that's the second part of this verse. So, friendship requires loyalty. None of these in here, I believe, use the word loyalty, but the definition of loyalty or the concept of loyalty is in between the lines. You should be able to read that in between the line.
A friend loves it all times, and a brother is born for adversity. This is the verse I was talking about where there's a friend that sticks closer than a brother. But a friend loves it all times. I mean, the friend is going to be loyal in that loving at all times.
A friend is, it doesn't say a friend loves most of the time. It doesn't say a friend loves almost all the time. A friend loves at all times. And that is regardless of the struggle, the struggle bus that you're that you're riding in.
And so, a man who has friends must first be, must himself first be friendly. I think I added a word in there I didn't mean to, but there's a friend who sticks closer than a brother. In the previous verse we see Proverbs 1717, a brother is born for adversity, but there is a friend who is closer than that, who will help you through that adversity, who will be on the other side of that adversity. And, you know, there is the concept of friendship that goes way beyond blood.
And, you know, there's a phrase blood is thicker than water. Well, a lot of times, a lot of times blood ain't as thick as the commitment that two friends have between one and other true friends. Friends that are able to get together, friends that are able to criticize one another, friends that are able to tell one to do something wrong. One's able to hear that they're doing something wrong and they're still able to converse, they're still able to share that love, to share that loyalty and, you know, little struggles, little arguments.
Yeah, they may upset you or they may make you feel a little bitter at first, but true friendship, that type of stuff does not come between. Does not come between two friends, three friends, four friends, it doesn't matter how many friends, it doesn't come between you. Behold how good and pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity. Psalm 133 verse 1.
Man, when two friends get together, when they make that, it's generally an unstated commitment to one another. Okay, there are times when it's stated, like in marriage, that is a stated commitment. Your wife should be your best friend or your husband should be your best friend. So that time it's stated generally between two friends, there's an unwritten or an unstated unity where you're both on the same page.
Yeah, you have your quirks. I have mine. But this thing here, whatever it is, you know, we're going to make it through. We'll be there for you in time of trouble and we'll make sure that any struggle you're going through, any hardship you're going through, you get through it.
And then we not only will be there before the struggle, during the struggle, but we will be there after it as well. Friends generally have that unwritten understanding. If you know what I saw a video the other day that was like adversity will demonstrate three things. It'll demonstrate your level of humility, your level of integrity and your toughness.
And so if you have a friend, and I'm going to put quotes, air quotes, a friend that's going through a struggle and you're not there for them. Well, that struggle for your friend demonstrated your humility, your loyalty, your integrity to that friend. Because what happens when you're going to be struggling? What happens when something comes up with you and you call on them to help out?
Or you mentioned something to them, I need your help here and you're out of luck. You're out of luck, blue-grow. And that's the point is that how nice, how pleasant, how good it is when brethren dwell together in unity. Proverbs 27 verse 10, do not forsake your own friend or your father's friend nor go to your brother's house in the day of calamity.
Better is a neighbor nearby than a brother far away. I'm not going to proclaim to understand all the little nuances there. I think I use the New King James Version, maybe the easier to reversion is a little easier to interpret there. But ultimately, is the first line there.
Do not forsake your own friend or your father's friend. Do not forsake them. And that's the same thing I'm talking about. They go through something.
They need you. Where are you? If you're not there, you forsaken them. Next friendship requires humility.
Humility and love are two of the most important things a single person can possess. If you're talking about in a relationship, they become even more important than what I was just inferring right there. But humility, taking a step back for a second, putting others before yourself, two are better than one, because they have a good reward for the labor. If they fall, one will lift up his companion, but woe to him as alone.
When he falls, he has no one to help him up. So I put this one under humility because this one generally is used a lot with marriage. And it talks about a three-pronged cord or three-fold cord is not easily broken. I believe it goes into that next couple of verses.
But here's the point is that you need to understand you're going to fall. You're going to fall sometime. And you're going to need help. Everybody's going to need help.
Man, I just had surgery a couple of weeks ago. And my dad called me and he was trying to tell me, what do you need me to do? I was like, I don't know. I never had surgery before.
I've never been told not to lift more than a jug of water or a jug of milk or whatever it is. I've never been told not to over-exert myself because of the surgery. What do you need? And I honestly could not tell him what I needed.
And then, you know, as days kind of progressed, I was able to say, well, I can't go to the store. I can't buy a case of water or whatever. I don't feel comfortable driving because the belt went right across my stomach where the surgery was. I had to slam the brakes and then that auto lock on the belt kicks into gear and then I jolt forward.
That could really potentially hurt. I couldn't under... I couldn't fathom the day he was asking me. I hadn't even gotten out of the hospital yet.
What are you going to need? I had no idea. I had no idea. But what I ended up having to do was take my own pride out of it.
I've never asked... Well, I don't want to say never, but I very rarely ask for help. And it's a pride thing. It always has been.
I want to be able to do what I have to do. I want to get it done myself. And I also want to try to be able to provide some things for people that need those things. Well, I was in need.
And I can't tell you how many people gave me a call and said, if you need anything, let me know. Man, there's just so many things. I was in a hospital before the surgery. It was actually the little stint in there to get me on antibiotics, see if that medical therapy or medicinal therapy, whatever they call it, would work without surgery.
And a friend of mine, Alan, Walker Wits, he said, what do you need? And Alan has always been a really good friend of mine. And honestly, we haven't hung out as often as we probably should, but we've also had families come into play. And so anyway, he said, what do you need?
And I was like, are you serious? Because there's one thing I'm thinking of. And I thought about it at that moment. It wasn't because he called.
It was just because that was what was on my mind. I knew I got a letter from the HOA saying my front yard was going to be too tall or grass or whatever. And I was in the hospital for four days or five days. And I said, well, to be honest, this is what I need right now.
I need somebody to be able to mow my yard. And he said, what's the address? I get home from the hospital three days after that discussion. And freshly mowed and weeded the yard.
And it was something that, man, I still kind of feel like I have this thing to repay, this debt that I owe. I even said something to him. And he said, don't even worry about it. And I met Alan.
How long ago, I met you? What was it? Man, elementary or something? Maybe pre-elementary.
It was a long, long time ago. I know your mom worked for the school we went to. And so I know I couldn't pinpoint when the first time I met Alan was, but we got pretty close in high school. And then we remained to where we get together.
We don't even skip a beat. And that's the type of thing I was talking to my daughter about. How many friends do you have? Like that.
She used 12 or 13 or something. So maybe it was a little premature of a conversation. And that's very, very possible. But man, Alan, he came through and he did that for me.
And that was something that I knew afterward after the surgery, if I was going to have it, I wasn't going to be able to do for a while. And so actually, buddy, Andrew of mine has come over every couple of weeks or has put it on schedule every couple of weeks. And just says, if it's not raining or it hadn't rain in a couple of days, I'll take care of it. And so I'm kind of getting to that point where I'm going to feel comfortable being able to do that pretty soon.
But man, I've had to rely on people. And I've never had to rely on anybody before. And it's just humbling. And I love all of those guys.
And Joe, Joe has the average Joe of average Joe's media. We've known each other about as long as what I was talking about with Alan. We know each other a little bit different, maybe a little bit longer from the standpoint of me and Joe went to church together when we were young kids in church camps and stuff like that. We didn't go to schools together until high school.
But his mom and my mom were friends growing up in school. And so through some life experience, we became quite a bit closer about five or six years ago than we had been. Joe had some life events go on right after high school. And I went to college and did all that stuff and kind of separated myself.
But then through some similar events, we became reconnected with quite a bit stronger connection than it was before. And so man, he brought the first hospital stage during spring break. He brought me a TV and a PlayStation and stuff. Because you can only have one visitor at a time and then the very next day it was no visitors at all.
It was crazy how quickly that happened. But he brought me that stuff and I was able to connect to the Wi-Fi and we were able to communicate and talk through a video game. And he brought me all kinds of stuff. And it was a thing that was whatever you need, whatever you need, Josh.
And there's no words to express the gratefulness that I have for guys in my life that do that type of stuff for me. It's taken really this long in my life. I'm 36 now and it's taken that long for me to truly understand that need to have someone or multiple someone's in your life that's going to do that for you. And so having a friend that you can call on, having a friend that you can just get together and shoot the bull, having a friend that you can rely on to vent to and understand that they're going to just listen.
And if they feel like offering advice, well, it's your friend who cares. We're going to get to that in a second too. So let them off for the advice. You're not being a friend if you're not letting them offer the advice.
It works both ways. If you want to vent, then you need to be receptive of the advice. You need to be friendly and hear them as well because they just heard you. I mean, how many times are you sitting there when you're talking to somebody and you're like, oh, look how great of a listener I am.
I'm kind of stealing this from a comedy central bit. But man, I should get an award for how great I'm listening. But then they want to talk a little bit after they've listened or you want to talk a little bit after you've listened. Wouldn't you hope that at least they are listening to you as well?
Whether they take your advice or not, that's up to them. But I mean, if you're going to listen to somebody, then you would hope that they want to listen to you as well. A Proverbs 1824, again, a man who has friends must himself be friendly. That requires you to take a step back.
That requires you to understand if I want a friend, I got to be a friend. That requires humility. That requires humility. Philippians 2, verse 3 through 4, let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit.
But in the lowliness of mine, let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests but also for the interests of others. This has got to be a central theme of friendship. Listen, if it's going to be your selfish ambition, you're hoping that if you have a friend, it's also their selfish ambition too.
And you've got to hope that those things line up and once they start to conflict, once they start to cross, no longer is it the friendship that you thought it's now a one-way street. It's now something where you've put yourself above somebody else. And it's just not that given take that's required in friendship. Last thing, and I think this is maybe the most important thing friendship requires honesty.
If you can't be honest with somebody, how can you call them your friend? If you can't just, man, honesty comes in so many shapes and forms, somebody asks what you think, be honest. Somebody asks what's going on in your life, be honest. How many details you give?
That's up to y'all. That's up to y'all's little conversation. That's up to the give and take. The person asks what's going on.
You say, oh, you know, things are a little rough, jobs are a little crazy. Oh, what's going on with your job? Now he's going a little bit more detail. You can give him a little more.
Listen, the conversation goes how it goes. But honestly, why would you lie to a friend? All that's going to do is separate you. When that lie comes out, whether it's a big one or a small one, it's going to put a divide between you.
And it makes no sense to lie to a friend. Proverbs 27, 17 is iron sharp and iron. So one man sharpens the count and stuff's friend. Man, the one thing here, iron, it's rigid.
It's strong. If you're strong, your friend will be strong as well. If your friend is strong, he will help you be strong. It starts with honesty.
Proverbs 27 verse 9, ointment and perfume delight the heart and the sweetness of a man's friend gives delight by his hearty counsel. Your friend's not going to tell you to go do something that you shouldn't do. It's not going to happen. Your friend's also not going to give you counsel that he or she doesn't think that you need.
You do something that's wrong or that they perceive to be wrong. They let you know. Okay? They let you know.
And that's okay. That's okay. The righteous should choose his friends carefully and the way of the wicked leads them astray. The way of the wicked, generally the opposite of honesty.
Generally the opposite of honesty. You choose your friends carefully. Someone who's going to lie to you. Someone who's going to tell you details just because maybe they think you want to hear these details.
They're catering to you, but they're not really confiding in you. Choose your friends carefully. Proverbs 27 verse 6, this goes along with 27 verse 9, actually precedes 27 verse 9. Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.
Faithful are the wounds of a friend. A friend is not going to tell you something just to upset you. A friend is not going to intentionally do something that's going to upset you for the sake of upsetting you. A friend is going to tell you what you need to hear and it's a faithful gesture.
It's something that you understand that you need. It's an honest gesture. A perverse man so strife and a whisper separates the best of friends. Proverbs 1628, here we're talking about gossip.
Sewing strife, trying to get two people at inventory or odds with one another. A perverse man so strife and a whisper separates the best of friends. People who gossip come between friends because now you're having to choose between people. Well, Proverbs 1226, choose your friends carefully.
Carefully examine that gossip. And honestly, if you're a friend and you hear some gossip about a friend of yours, you go to that friend and say, I heard this about you, is it true? Is it not? And then you can go from there, but you go up to them, they come to you and you'll have a meeting of the minds.
Faithful are the wounds of a friend. The kisses of an enemy are deceitful. 1 Corinthians 1533, do not be deceived. Evil company corrupts good habits.
It's basic. It's basic. Evil company corrupts good habits. Honest people, generally, generally speaking, I'm sure there's exceptions, but honest people generally are not evil.
And if they're being honest with themselves, they can't allow themselves to be evil. But that's the thing. You hang out with liars, you become a liar. I used to hang out with this guy that my parents stopped letting me hang out with because every time I came home, I started acting like you.
I started contorting the truth or purporting. I don't know what the word is. But I started twisting it a little bit. What are you doing?
Not everything. I'm not going to tell you everything I've been doing. I'll tell you some of it. It's that kind of behavior that I was doing.
I was younger. I was impressionable. I was young. I didn't know what to do.
But if you choose your friends carefully, if you listen to the council, if you understand that a friend comes to you and he's not trying to hurt you with what he says or what he does, if you understand it, iron sharpens iron and a man will sharpen the countenance of his friend. If you understand that whispers gossip promotes strife and separates friends, if you understand all these things, then you can honestly say, first of all, have I done any of this? Have I done this to any of my friends? And then you can look at anything your friends have done.
Should they be my friend if they're doing this type of stuff? If they're gossiping, if they have some sort of dishonesty. But be careful in how you choose your friends. I feel like I may be a little bit loose in some of those verses, but I feel like there's a tie there to honesty, a tie there to staying in the realm of good company.
And so, anyways guys, I wanted to talk about this because I think that it's extremely important that not only are you aware of what it means to be a friend, but God's aware of what it is to be a friend. And so, it's about, man, if you look at how Christians should act in the Bible, you go through all of the things that they should do. You look at the Christian grace as you look at the conduct of a Christian, you find some of that in Romans 12 or 14 or both. You find a lot of that in the fruit of the Spirit with that Galatians 6, I believe, or Ephesians.
It's blowing my mind right now, but in the letters that Paul wrote, he wrote all kinds of things to do to demonstrate you're being a Christian. Guys, if you're listening to this, hopefully this is not falling on deaf ears, but if you conduct yourself like a Christian, then friendship should come naturally to you. It should come naturally in receiving friends and it should come naturally in demonstrating friendship. You should make sure that it's reciprocal and that there is no one-sided friendship.
It doesn't make any sense. You can take this in a concept of marriage, you can take this in a concept of how you feel about your brother or sister, your siblings. If they're your friends, then they're going to act friendly, regardless of blood. There's just so many different ways that you can attach this topic to people in your life.
But you got to first remember, you got to first remember that a man who has friends must himself be friendly and also know, and this could be you, there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. The last thing that I want to talk about is in the book of, I know what this is, bear with me for one second. James, in the book of James, James is a phenomenal book. Especially if you're looking for how you can apply things today.
But James 4 verse 4, adulterers and adulterers says, do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God, who ever, therefore, wants to be a friend of the world, makes himself an enemy of God? In the Bible, there are a ton of, they are a ton of things that separate the righteous from the godly, from the worldly. And those things generally come side by side. One verse is what the world does, what the world perverts, and the next verse is what God steams.
And so you can't serve two masters, you can't serve both God and man, you can't do that. And so becoming a friend of the world means you've chosen sides and you've put yourself at enmity with God. Guys, I hope you've taken a little bit out of this, and I hope it's something that you can apply. Again, everything that I teach here or talk about or try to impart here has to do with making sure that there's a solid foundation of love and humility.
And from there, you shouldn't, you should be able to get through your struggles, you should be able to get through your trials, you should be able to make friends and keep them. You should be able to demonstrate that kindness we talked about last time. There are so many things that would love and humility. If you have those things, you're going to demonstrate a ton of success in your personal life, in your spiritual walk.
And hopefully friendship is one of those things. Until next time, I am the average Joe Boo. I will not boast in anything. No kiss, no power, no wisdom, but I will boast in Jesus Christ.
His death and resurrection. Why should I gain from his reward? I cannot give an answer, but this I know is all my heart. His wounds are paid by grandson.
I should I gain from his reward? I cannot give an answer, but this I know is all my heart. His wounds have paid by grandson.