From Over-Functioning to Receiving: Pleasure, Power & Nervous System Safety with Dr. Jordin Wiggins

In this episode of the Connected Pleasure Podcast, I’m joined by Dr. Jordin Wiggins —naturopathic doctor, author, coercive control clinician, and dominatrix-trained pleasure strategist—for a powerful, nuanced conversation about desire, power, and why so many successful women feel disconnected in their intimate lives.Jordin works with women who have done “everything right” on paper—careers, families, achievements—yet feel numb, exhausted, and unseen in their relationships. Together, we explore the concept of “super traits”: extreme empathy, loyalty, forgiveness, and over-functioning, traits that often lead women into relational dynamics where desire disappears and intimacy becomes extractive rather than nourishing.We unpack why traditional therapy and common relationship advice often fails women with super traits, how power imbalances go unaddressed in patriarchal models of intimacy, and why pleasure is not the reward for healing—but the reset that makes real connection possible.This conversation also dives into:How over-functioning and under-functioning dynamics erode desire and safetyWhy scheduling sex, “just setting boundaries,” or trying harder often backfiresThe role of sexual coercion and invisible power contracts in long-term relationshipsHow patriarchy harms everyone—including men—and why more men are now seeking this workPleasure as a nervous system capacity, not a performanceThe importance of learning to tolerate sensation—both pleasure and painFeminine and masculine energy, safety, and the ability to truly receiveWhat BDSM teaches us about consent, power, desire, and embodied choiceJordin shares how her own journey—from chronic health issues and a sexless marriage to pleasure-centered healing—led her to integrate functional medicine, trauma awareness, and embodied power work into a method that helps women move from survival-based intimacy into true receiving.This episode is an invitation to question the stories you’ve been told about love, sex, and responsibility—and to remember that desire must be freely chosen, not managed, negotiated, or earned.Pleasure is not indulgent. It is information. And it is a pathway home.Connect with Dr. Jordin WigginsInstagram: @drjordinwigginsTake the Super Traits Quiz Listen to The Pleasure Principles PodcastIf you’re feeling called to stay in touch with Kayla:Join the waitlist for the Sacred Desire courseBook your Liberation Wisdom sessionJoin my Newsletter CommunitySupport this podcast and leave me a tip!Book 45 minute consultationEmail me at [email protected] with any questions