Genesis 21: No Laughing Matter

In chapter 17, ה׳ tells Abraham he will have a son:וַיִּפֹּ֥ל אַבְרָהָ֖ם עַל־פָּנָ֑יו וַיִּצְחָ֗ק וַיֹּ֙אמֶר֙ בְּלִבּ֔וֹ הַלְּבֶ֥ן מֵאָ֖ה שָׁנָ֣ה יִוָּלֵ֑ד וְאִם־שָׂרָ֥ה הֲבַת־תִּשְׁעִ֖ים שָׁנָ֥ה תֵּלֵֽד׃“Abraham threw himself on his face and laughed (וַיִּצְחָק – vayitzchak), as he said to himself, ‘Can a child be born to a man a hundred years old, or can Sarah bear a child at ninety?’” (Genesis 17:17)ה׳ dismisses Abraham’s laughter and instructs him to name the child Isaac/Yitzchak:וַיֹּ֣אמֶר אֱלֹהִ֗ים אֲבָל֙ שָׂרָ֣ה אִשְׁתְּךָ֔ יֹלֶ֥דֶת לְךָ֖ בֵּ֑ן וְקָרָ֥אתָ שְׁמ֖וֹ יִצְחָ֑ק“God said, ‘Nevertheless, Sarah your wife shall bear you a son, and you shall name him Isaac (יִצְחָק – Yitzchak)’” (Genesis 17:19)In the next chapter, Sarah seems to have an identical reaction to the news, but not an identical response:וַתִּצְחַ֥ק שָׂרָ֖ה בְּקִרְבָּ֣הּ לֵאמֹ֑ר אַחֲרֵ֣י בְלֹתִ֔י הָֽיְתָה־לִּ֥י עֶדְנָ֖ה וַאדֹנִ֥י זָקֵֽן׃“And Sarah laughed (וַתִּצְחַק – vatitzchak) to herself, saying, ‘Now that I’ve lost the ability, am I to have enjoyment—with my husband so old?’” (Genesis 18:12)ה׳ seems upset with her reaction:וַיֹּ֣אמֶר ה׳ אֶל־אַבְרָהָ֔ם לָ֛מָּה זֹּ֥את צָחֲקָ֖ה שָׂרָ֣ה לֵאמֹ֑ר הַאַ֥ף אֻמְנָ֛ם אֵלֵ֖ד וַאֲנִ֥י זָקַֽנְתִּי׃“Then ה׳ said to Abraham, ‘Why did Sarah laugh (צָחֲקָה – tzachakah), saying, “Shall I in truth bear a child, old as I am?”’” (Genesis 18:13)Sarah, embarrassed, tries to hide what she did:וַתְּכַחֵ֤שׁ שָׂרָה֙ לֵאמֹ֔ר לֹ֥א צָחַ֖קְתִּי כִּ֣י יָרֵ֑אָה וַיֹּ֖אמֶר לֹ֥א כִּֽי־צָחָֽקְתְּ׃“Sarah lied, saying, ‘I did not laugh (צָחַקְתִּי – tzachakti),’ for she was frightened. Came the reply, ‘You did laugh (צָחָקְתְּ – tzachakt)’” (Genesis 18:15)Why is Abraham’s laughter dismissed and Sarah’s admonished? Even their way of laughing is not proportional to ה׳’s reaction. In chapter 17, Abraham literally falls on his face laughing, but in 18 Sarah laughs to herself! Some commentators suggest that in verse 13 ה׳ only says Sarah laughed at herself and not at Him—for shalom bayit purposes. The implication is that Sarah did something wrong by including Abraham in her doubt, and that was why ה׳ was upset. However, in chapter 17, Abraham also laughs at both of them, so that answer doesn’t fully hold.If we look carefully at verse 13, ה׳ is talking to Abraham, not Sarah. If ה׳ was angry at Sarah, He should have admonished her directly. Perhaps ה׳ is upset because Sarah’s reaction indicates that Abraham did not tell her about the promise. That is also why after Sarah lies, ה׳ only confirms that she laughed but does not rebuke her. ה׳ is angry at Abraham because by hiding the promise from Sarah, Abraham questioned ה׳’s ability to give them a child.Sarah gets the last laugh in this week’s chapter:וַתֹּ֣אמֶר שָׂרָ֗ה צְחֹ֤ק עָשָׂה־לִי֙ אֱלֹהִ֔ים כָּל־הַשֹּׁמֵ֖עַ יִצְחַ֥ק לִֽי׃“Sarah said, ‘God has brought me laughter (צְחֹק – tzchok); everyone who hears will laugh (יִצְחַק – yitzchak) with me.’” (Genesis 21:6)This time, Sarah’s laughter is flipped—she is given the chance to be happy again and that everyone will be happy for her.Abraham, on the other hand, is punished for his failure to believe his wife could have a child:וַתֵּ֧רֶא שָׂרָ֛ה אֶת־בֶּן־הָגָ֥ר הַמִּצְרִ֖ית אֲשֶׁר־יָלְדָ֣ה לְאַבְרָהָ֑ם מְצַחֵֽק׃“Sarah saw the son whom Hagar the Egyptian had borne to Abraham joking around (מְצַחֵק – metzachek)” (Genesis 21:9)Ishmael is ultimately exiled from the household by Sarah for laughing around—perhaps a reminder that not all laughter is created equal.