Go f*ck a peach!

Once upon a time, in the fabulous city of Vancouver, there prowled a big, bad monster named Grumbleguts. Grumbleguts was known far and wide for his terrifying roar and his love for spreading fear wherever he went. One sunny day, as Grumbleguts stomped through the streets, he spotted three royal angels, Banana, Scarlette, and October, sitting on a bench on Commercial Drive, looking absolutely angelic. Grumbleguts, eager to assert his monstrous dominance, approached the angels with a mighty roar. "Raaawr! Tremble before me, oh ye angels! I am Grumbleguts, the fiercest, the baddest, the most fearsome monster of them all!" But Banana, with her golden halo and sassy attitude, simply rolled her eyes and said, "Oh please, darling. We've seen scarier things in the discount bin at Sephora." Scarlette, with her shimmering wings and sharp wit, chimed in, "Yes, Grumbleguts, we've heard all about your roars. Do you practice them in the shower?" And October, with her radiant aura and quick comebacks, added, "Or maybe you're just a big softie underneath all that fur. Do you need a hug, honey?" Grumbleguts was taken aback. No one had ever responded to his roars with such sass and humor. He found himself chuckling at their witty remarks. "You angels are something else," he admitted. "I thought I wanted to scare you, but now I just want to join your fabulous girl gang!" And so, instead of causing chaos, Grumbleguts spent the day with Banana, Scarlette, and October, swapping makeup tips and sharing stories. He realized that beneath their angelic exteriors, these queens were just as fierce and fabulous as he was. From that day on, Grumbleguts became the angels' biggest fan, strutting down Commercial Drive with them, spreading glitter and rainbows wherever they went. And the angels? Well, they learned that sometimes, even the fiercest monsters just need a little love and laughter to show their softer side. If you heard your name you heard us wrong...