[GO! Podcast] 65 - "I'm Sooo Alone!"

hello and happy monday this is susan hyatt and it's go time this is the 65th episode in a series of go podcast designed to wake you up on your monday morning and get you going hey a few weeks ago did you guys watch the mtv video music awards if not stop everything you're doing including listening to this podcast and google beyonce vma performance 2016 watch the entire thing you will die and be reborn you are welcome prior to delivering her epic unbelievable on-stage performance at the vmas beyonce arrived on the red carpet looking stunning as usual but there was a little something unusual about her red carpet appearance instead of walking down the red carpet alone or with her husband jay-z as she typically does this year beyonce showed up with a huge girl squad she walked down the carpet surrounded by about a dozen women and girls who appeared in her lemonade visual album including ava clark and winnie harlow beyonce also brought leslie mcspadden gwen carr wanda johnson and sabrina fulton the mothers of michael brown eric garner oscar grant and travion martin four black men who were killed by police officers when beyonce arrived with her squad it wasn't just a typical red carpet appearance it was a historical moment a political statement and to me it felt like beyonce was delivering a message to the entire world when women stand together we are unstoppable and we will not be ignored so powerful i basically saw my way through the entire award show and you probably will too which brings me to our topic for today's podcast how to find female friends business partners and collaborators when you feel so alone this is a huge issue for so many women that i know almost every single week amongst my clients and my friends i hear women saying things like i feel so isolated i don't have a strong community in my city there's nobody who wants to work out with me or go running none of my friends are self-employed they have no idea what i'm trying to achieve or what this feels like i have lots of online friends but i don't have very many real friends that i feel close to there's nobody i can confide in if you're feeling like that please know that you're totally normal and you might be surprised by how many women feel exactly the same way so here's my advice for you creating a deep meaningful female friendship is just like any other goal that you might have it requires courageous action and consistent attention or it's just not going to happen you're not going to meet your bff by sitting at home moping and watching netflix that's just not how anything gets achieved being passive really gets you nowhere you need to reach out take action and invest time and energy into starting new relationships or nurturing the ones that you've already got here's something to try this week roll through your contact list whether it's your email or on your phone facebook wherever you collect people's info and choose one person that you'd love to create a deeper relationship with not 10 just one and reach out to that one person say hi send a sweet email or a text ask how she's doing invite her to do something interesting and fun you know go for a hike or take a bike ride or go to a cooking class or have a virtual dinner party via skype if you don't live in the same place take her out on a friend date it's not rocket science people it doesn't take all that much to nurture a friendship you just have to remember to do it and if you're a forgetful person or a super busy person with a lot going on like me consider making a note in your calendar that pops up once a week reminding you to reach out and do some friendship nurturing like ding it's 3 p.m it's time to email a friend and set up a play date this might sound really silly but seriously it can help most weeks i designate friday as my special day for doing fun social stuff i call it fun fridays and every friday i make an effort to meet up with a friend for some kind of fun some kind of inspiring experience like a workout or a meal or a movie whatever we feel like doing like tonight my best friend francis and i we're going out to dinner and a movie we're probably going to see bridget jones's baby maybe you could do fun fridays too or sisterhood saturdays or make a friend mondays you get the idea but set aside a specific portion of your week especially for nurturing your friendships and lastly i want to mention something i've noticed in my own life which is that my strongest friendships are born out of a shared vision or shared goal so when two women are working towards something together particularly something that's demanding challenging emotionally risky and brave it creates a deep level of connection and sisterly love my best friend francis and i we go running together almost every single morning at 5 a.m rain sweet or snow and we've done this for years we've gone running on her worst days and my worst days we've gone running with tears in our eyes we've helped each other through incredibly demanding times physically emotionally and professionally and we're there for each other and on our daily run that's become symbolic of the bond that we share another one of my best friends is a woman named lara wagner she's a psychologist life coach and fitness trainer and our relationship has evolved through the years she was once upon a time my client sometimes she's still my client i've become one of her biggest fans she has mentored me and vice versa and we've traveled around the world together and currently we're collaborating on a super exciting new business concept that i can't tell you about just yet but i will soon working on a shared goal has deepened our friendship even more i would trust this woman with my life so i promise you it's totally possible to create an amazing loving tight-knit community of female friends even if you have an unconventional career even if you're super busy even if you've got kids and even if you live in a small uncool city in the middle of nowhere all of those factors apply to me so if i can do this so can you this week choose one woman that you respect and admire and reach out to her and invite her to do something with you set up a play date even better invite her to dive into a shared goal project or vision with you if you can work on something together side by side it will strengthen your bond like nothing else your future bff is out there and she might already be on your contact list she might be feeling just as lonely as you do wishing she had a best friend like you so take the initiative reach out and make it happen it's go time p.s you may have already noticed but registration for my six week coaching program go get it is open now oh yeah with this program you choose one super specific career business or income related goal you post your goal in our private facebook group so that everyone can see and hold you accountable and then you pursue your goal with 100% commitment for six weeks weeks in a row and you post a status update at the end of each week you get tons of inspiration and support from me and the go get it community which is filled with tons of women who are pursuing big goals just like you it's so fun and crazily motivating the last session was amazing so many women pursuing all kinds of goals like new jobs earning thousands of extra dollars launching new projects getting featured in magazines all kinds of cool stuff and getting shit done i definitely urge you to check this out head over to ashyatt.com click on the programs tab and select go get it again head to ashyatt.com click on the programs tab and select go get it and you can see all the details and there are three different enrollment levels so don't dilly dally though because enrollment closes soon and the program begins on october 10th so if you're craving sisterhood daily motivation and a structured program that will push you to get things you've been putting off for way too long this is for you go get it enroll today and i'll see you in there