God’s Design for a Financially Healthy Marriage with Dr. Art Rainer

Few things reveal the strength of a couple’s unity quite like money. Financial decisions touch nearly every part of married life—from daily spending and long-term planning to generosity, security, and the future. But money does not have to remain a source of tension. When couples approach their finances with transparency, shared purpose, and a biblical understanding of stewardship, money can become a tool that strengthens their marriage and supports what God has called them to do together. Dr. Art Rainer, founder of Christian Money Solutions and the Institute for Christian Financial Health, as well as the author of The Rich Couple: 30 Days of Following God’s Design for a Financially Healthy Marriage, joins the show today to share that a “rich couple” has little to do with the size of a bank account. Instead, it means becoming rich in contentment, purpose, unity, and generosity. Redefining What It Means to Be Rich Our culture often defines a rich couple as one with a high income, an impressive home, or a large investment portfolio. But financial wealth can disappear, and continually chasing more often produces comparison rather than contentment. A truly rich couple recognizes that everything they have belongs to God. They understand that they are stewards—not owners—of the resources He has entrusted to them. That conviction changes the purpose of money. Instead of asking only, “How can we accumulate more?” couples can begin asking: How can we faithfully manage what God has provided? How can our finances reflect our shared values? How can we use what we have to serve others? What does contentment look like in this season? When contentment is rooted in Christ and financial decisions are guided by God’s purposes, couples can experience a kind of richness that circumstances cannot easily take away. Moving From “Mine” and “Yours” to “Ours” Genesis 2:24 describes marriage as two people becoming one flesh. That oneness includes more than physical or emotional intimacy. It also shapes how couples view their possessions, income, debt, goals, and generosity. Marriage is a covenant, not merely a contract. Rather than guarding separate financial territories, a husband and wife can learn to approach money as teammates. Practically, this requires complete financial transparency. Both spouses should understand what the household earns, owes, owns, spends, saves, and gives. For many couples, this may involve shared accounts and passwords. For others, the account structure may differ, but openness and mutual accountability should remain nonnegotiable. Even language can reinforce unity. Saying “our income,” “our debt,” and “our generosity” reminds both spouses that they are working toward a shared future. A brief monthly financial meeting can also help. Couples can review their progress, discuss upcoming expenses, and make important decisions together. Establishing a spending threshold—an amount neither spouse spends without first consulting the other—can reduce surprises and build trust. Unity rarely happens accidentally. It grows through intentional habits. Remember That Marriage Is a Team Sport Your spouse should be your closest financial teammate. That does not mean you will always agree. Different personalities, experiences, and priorities will inevitably create tension. The goal is not to eliminate every disagreement but to remain committed to reaching decisions together. Couples should be able to discuss differences honestly in private while presenting a united front to outside voices. Advice from parents, friends, or children may be well-intentioned, but those voices should not undermine the marriage. A healthy response to an outside suggestion might simply be, “Thank you. We’ll discuss it together and let you know.” That protects the couple’s unity and reassures each spouse that decisions will not be reversed or weakened by someone else’s opinion. Share Your Money Stories Many financial disagreements are not really about the transaction in front of you. They are rooted in earlier experiences. Perhaps one spouse grew up in a home where money was scarce and now feels anxious without a substantial emergency fund. The other may have grown up in a financially comfortable home and feel little concern about spending. One may naturally save, while the other prefers to spend, invest, or avoid financial decisions altogether. Sharing these stories can replace frustration with empathy. Instead of asking, “Why are you like this?” a spouse may begin to say, “Now I understand why this decision feels so important to you.” Consider asking each other: What is your earliest memory involving money? Discuss how that experience may still influence your attitudes toward spending, debt, saving, generosity, or risk. Listen without interrupting or trying to correct one another. Understanding your spouse’s story does not mean every financial habit should remain unchanged. It does, however, create a more compassionate starting point for change. Address the Four Financial Dividers Four common problems can weaken financial unity in marriage: poor communication, selfishness, distrust, and unrealistic expectations. Poor communication can be addressed through regular conversations. Even a weekly 10-minute check-in can prevent small concerns from becoming major conflicts. Selfishness begins to fade when couples stop thinking primarily in terms of “my money” and start celebrating each other’s progress. Distrust must be confronted with honesty. Hidden purchases, secret accounts, concealed debt, or missing information will erode intimacy. Financial transparency brings those issues into the light. Unrealistic expectations can be replaced with a shared plan. A realistic budget will not allow every desire to happen immediately, but it can help couples prioritize what matters most. Talk early, tell the truth, and pray often. Start With Your Hearts, Not the Budget When a marriage feels financially divided, opening a spreadsheet may not be the best first step. Begin with prayer. Ask God to help you become one, grow in contentment, understand each other, and steward His resources faithfully. Then spend a few minutes sharing your experiences and concerns without interrupting or judging one another. Finally, choose one small act of unity. You might schedule your first weekly money conversation, disclose an overlooked expense, agree on a giving goal, or deposit a small amount into a joint savings fund. One step will not resolve every financial disagreement. But small acts of faithfulness can create lasting momentum. A rich marriage is not defined by how much a couple possesses. It is marked by two people learning to trust God, care for one another, and manage His resources with unity and purpose. On Today’s Program, Rob Answers Listener Questions: I’m retired and have a small IRA and some savings at Schwab. I also expect to inherit assets from an older family member. Since I won’t need my IRA for living expenses, is there any advantage to keeping it? I’m struggling with $8,900 in credit card debt at a 23.49% APR and can’t afford to pay it off right now. I’ve contacted my credit card company about hardship options and have looked into consolidation and personal loans, but I’m unsure what’s best. Given my situation, what’s the wisest way to tackle this debt? Resources Mentioned: Faithful Steward: FaithFi’s Quarterly Magazine (Become a FaithFi Partner) The Rich Couple: 30 Days of Following God's Design for a Financially Healthy Marriage by Dr. Art Rainer The Money Challenge: 30 Days of Discovering God's Design For You and Your Money by Dr. Art Rainer Christian Money Solutions  Institute for Christian Financial Health Christian Credit Counselors Our Ultimate Treasure: A 21-Day Journey to Faithful Stewardship by Rob West Wisdom Over Wealth: 12 Lessons from Ecclesiastes on Money Look At The Sparrows: A 21-Day Devotional on Financial Fear and Anxiety Rich Toward God: A Study on the Parable of the Rich Fool Find a Certified Kingdom Advisor® (CKA) FaithFi App Remember, you can call in to ask your questions every weekday at (800) 525-7000. Faith & Finance is also available on Moody Radio Network and American Family Radio. 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