138: Grief and People Pleasing (Another Quick Sip with Ryan and Rachel)

Ryan and Rachel discuss grief and loss in addiction and sobriety, prompted by Rachel learning via social media that a former friend from her bar days has died. Rachel, 34, shares that she has lost 10–11 friends to overdoses or accidents and describes attending an upcoming candle lighting while navigating anxiety about seeing people who distanced themselves when she got sober. Ryan compares grieving in active addiction versus sober, recounting friends he lost, including Mark’s suicide and Jeff’s fatal fall, and regrets drinking through his sister’s fentanyl-overdose memorial. They emphasize being present, processing emotions without using, and how these losses motivate recovery “out loud.” The episode also touches on people-pleasing in recovery, the need for boundaries and self-preservation, and doing the work outside meetings to address underlying issues.