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Don't drag the team. Don't grate the wench. You're like moaning. Get back in your ear.
Do you have that look? Better or worse? Better? It looks amazing.
Cheers. Just let God go with you. But like, what can I not say? You can say anything you want.
Can I talk about- Put the microphone in front of your face. That is up, Daddy Gang. It is your founding father, Alex Cooper, with Call Her. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah. Okay, tonight's about to get away from her. Okay, cheers. Let's do a quick little prayer.
Let's do a quick little seance. It's art father who art in color, Daddy. How would that come? How would that probably be that I sang a lot of bad shit tonight?
Oh, oh, oh. My kingdom come. I will make him come. And I will not sound dumb.
Amen. That's not a prayer. No, yeah. That's my new religion.
Do you think any of your exes will be watching tonight? Hopefully, if they have a phone. Those poor brokies, those little weird freaks. Do you go over broke men?
Sometimes to humble myself. Hallie Batchelder, welcome to Call Her Daddy. You may be wondering why we're dressed like a daddy gang. I don't know.
No, we're like back. We're in New York right now. You're back to your roots. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Imagine if we knew each other when I was in New York. No, you would be dead. No, you wouldn't be alive. I wouldn't have my career.
Yeah, I'd bet you're a few in role and you wouldn't have your career. Or your husband. I would definitely not have my husband. We also imagine if we knew each other when you live in Boston.
No, I wouldn't have been a volatile girl. I would have just become friends with your dad. How much of I fucked your dad? That's not funny.
Isn't he happily married? No, he's happily married. But imagine if Alex Cooper was my mom. And I was like, Alex, what's for dinner?
She's like $525 million deal. Let me just preface this with anybody that's driving in the car on the way to work. Because they could be on their way to work. They could be nursing their child right now.
Hopefully not. They could be doing something wholesome. It is about seven o'clock at night in Los Angeles, California. So hot.
No, it's so hot. We got to take this shit off. This hood. We are sweating and we're drinking martinis.
And I'm sitting across from Halle. Now I discovered Halle on TikTok one day and I said, I'd like that bitch. I would like to be friends with that bitch. And then I ended up starting a company and I was like, oh, I can be friends with her.
And I can work with her, which is pretty cool. And Halle is going to be launching her podcast tomorrow. Extra dirty episode one comes out. So cheers.
You fucking did it. You did it bitch. Should we take this shit off? Yeah.
Maybe not a sunglasses but at least this. No, I'm overheating. And then let's recall your hair. We'd.
I looked like George Washington the third. Last time I saw you was in Los Angeles. Yes. And Matt and I were putting you to bed.
Yes. I was the scariest thing ever because I was cross-fated on that fucking PJ back. Talk about that experience. No.
They were like, hey, hey, I don't know. Wiz was playing his music and I was like, okay. And you were like, yeah. And he was like, wait, have the whiskey and smoke the blood.
And I don't smoke weed at all. So when I hit it, I was so paranoid. I think sweetie thanked me for being there. I go, you're welcome.
I don't know. So we're on the plane. I turn around and Halle has her hands crossed in a prayer position. And she's not moving.
And she's not speaking. And she's not making eye contact with anyone. And I kept turning around and being like, Halle, are you. Well, I'm like with my boss.
Those girls that just signed me to the company. And I don't smoke at all. I'm not a smoker. I don't smoke weed.
I don't smoke weed. I don't like downers like that. I was like, I was a little confused. I was going on.
I was trying to play fucking cool. And I was supposed to go from landing from the PJ. And I was like, my plan was to Uber to LAX. And I'm like, what time is your flight?
I've never heard of a flight taking off at like a steady 230. And Halle's like, oh, I don't have a flight. I'm going to get one though. And she is blazed out of her mind, not making eye contact with anyone still.
And she has glasses on. And she's like, no, I'm going to catch a flight. To which Matt says, excuse me, you're not going to LAX. You're coming home with us.
I was like, gay. I mean, the thing is, I woke up in your gas bed on top of the covers. I didn't even take my clothes off. Didn't even tuck in.
You would give me a whole house tour that I don't even recall. I woke up and there was a desktop right in front of me. I clicked the name and I go to Alex Cooper. Desktop.
And I go, fuck. No, not today. And it was like noon. And I could hear you guys downstairs making coffee.
And I was like calling, like, Lauren, I was calling all my friends. I'm like, I don't know if I can go downstairs. This is terrible. This is like a nightmare.
No, that was fun. No, that was fun. How would you describe your personality when you're drunk? Aside from the wandering eye.
I feel like either I go and you, like you don't know if I'm like drunk or not. Or I'm just like completely in extra version of my extra self. I don't want to cause a scene. I'm not like confrontational at all.
Some people want to get drunk. They're like mean and rude and confrontational. Yeah, I'm very chill. I'm also like a very like a respectful human being.
I feel like I'm just like down with like the vibe. So I'm just trying to like, I don't want to cause a scene. Are you someone that is going to drunk text people? Are you drunk text people?
Yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, like who's not? Like, I don't know, like, grow up.
Wait, but I like have had a couple like drunk text situations where I'm just like, there's me, there needs to be a child lock on my phone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Once I send this nude to this guy and it was a video, it was like a cinematic masterpiece. And I was using like a bright pink fuchsia dildo and I was absolutely plastering myself with it.
What? Are you in your bed? Yeah, my twin bed on the end bucket. No, you're doing anything.
And I sent it to the wrong guy. His name started with them. The other guys names are them. But the guy I sent it to was like this guy named Matt from like sleep, wait camp when I was 14.
And I was like, you're a blessed day like that. I don't fucking care. Did you realize that when you were fucked up or did you realize in the morning? In the morning he thumbs up dead.
He didn't even reply. He's he wants to know. He was like, this ain't for me. He was like, yeah.
In that moment, question, do you then decide cinematic masterpiece? Should I actually now fire this off to the right person? It was too late. It was too late.
The person I wanted to even fire it off to I think didn't deserve it. I think this random guy from sleep, wait camp deserved it more at this point. But my drunk texts weren't even like where you out. They were just like very well composed like sex with like an intro, three supporting arguments and like a closing statement.
I'd be like, this is a cinematic mat. I'd be like, I wouldn't even regret that. I'm gonna die on this hill. So I'm published this shit.
How the fuck are you like writing that shit when you're fucked up? Hey, I shot GBT. Give it to me right now. One, two, three.
Howie, I fucking love you. Okay, where did you come from? Like I feel like you crawled out of the hole. Like were your parents tricked with you growing up?
Like what was what was going on? I mean, they were they were instructed at all. I feel like they had expectations like you had to get good grades, make your bed, don't get pregnant. Although I did once but like don't get pregnant.
Okay, so my parents can be strict sometimes. Oh, okay. Like when I would throw parties in college, there was one time I threw a party in college and I had all my friends over. It was like for my friend's birthday and like one of her girlfriends like threw up all over my parents' carpet.
The cops that came, everyone was like hiding in a room. They went up to like the fourth floor. I lived in like a brownstone in Boston. They went to the fourth floor into my parents' room.
This girl threw up all over like my parents like a hundred thousand dollar carpet. It was horrid. It was a fucking crime scene. Okay.
So they found out I've never seen my dad so mad at me. I thought I was cut off for good. I thought I was cut off for good. So I signed up for seeking arrangements.
No. I was being the most. I was so extra. I was like seeking arrangements near me.
I'm done. There's no way. I never went on a date but I signed up. You know I got a committee of once.
Let's talk about Clivina. Oh wait twice. Oh sorry. So tell me about your time.
I mean I got a committee of once. It was with an older gent who I loved. Really? I didn't love him.
I just loved how rich he was. I don't know. He was so rich. Like we'd go to like a bar and he'd be like what do you want to drink?
I'd be like I want to spice him a gree da. And he'd be like I'll give you a spicey and do. And then he'd be like how much I tip a thou? Should I tip a thou?
He like abbreviated a thou and I was like tip a thou. And then he invited me to the Bahamas and his friend had a private island. And it was just all the things. He was in that scene.
And I was like I'm sorry. This is going to be good. His name was Diddy. No stop.
No but he would like flat. How was this man? He was even that old. He was like 38.
Held three at the time? 23. Oh hey that's good. He was weathered though.
He looked stressed out. He looked like a leather couch. Like he looked like he was stressed out at work. What was he up to?
What did he do for work? He was a hedge fund owner owner. Wait that's hot. Owners.
Is that a thing to you? How did you meet him? Nanceckit. That's...
And he didn't have children or kids? He got a... Got me pregnant. He got you pregnant?
Yes that was the same guy. Inclimidea but I thought the committee appeal was post-pounding my period. So it was like double homicide. Pow pow pow.
How? How? What? Can I not say that?
You know what? I think you fucking should say that because in the state of the motherfucking union of our country you had a right. And thank God I was able to have an abortion back then. Honestly I can't even imagine if it wasn't an option to me.
So imagine you as a mother right now. Like right here. Hi father Cooper. New union interview.
I think Tits can I even breastfeed? Wait. Okay. You?
I think there's under the muzzle. I continue. Okay. You know you...
That's what I remember you drugged me in the back of the car with Matt and I and I and her way back. You're like guys I have something I really want to talk to you about. And I'm like oh we're in time back so dirty whatever. You're like I kind of want to go bigger.
I don't want to go bigger. I stand by the... You want to go bigger? You want to go bigger?
You're bigger. You're too. Well there are all right. Two 95 CC high profile and everyone thinks they're real.
Everyone thinks they're real. No like when I like oh my god like everyone thinks they're real. Like I'm not gonna rock in a sock. Like picture a rock in a sock.
You know you're swinging a rock in a sock. It's like a weapon okay. So like I filled that up and I went conservative with the CCs. But they don't look fake enough.
If I'm going under the knife. Pop it up. Make them look fake. You want to go bigger.
They bounce. You don't like that. You don't want them to bounce. Not really.
You want them to just be... Oh I'm just sat. And listening to me. Wait you went to Catholic school?
Yeah. That's shocking. That's literally makes so much sense. I went to Catholic school also.
I was like that oh yeah. Just a lot of repression. He's like caging a wild animal and setting them free into the college. From fifth through twelfth grade I never had a class with a male.
I'd slept with one guy and I'd done like one line of Adderall. And I was like I'm a freak. I'm so crazy. And then I got to college and I was like wait dick.
Wasn't saying. So high school you were pretty tame. So tame. What was your first boyfriend?
He was like this very religious. Went to the brother's school. All boys Catholic school was like captain of the hockey team. Very nice guy.
Very religious. Massive dick. I know. I miss him.
Okay. Where is he now you think? He is girlfriend. Oh he's like five seven.
Are you five eight? Yeah. In grass. Five foot.
But the big dick. He was a tripod Alex. The walking tripod. If the wind gusted him right over he wouldn't be standing right up.
But now that is your first experience of the little intimidating though. Well intimidating for everyone else. Like after him it was like what is this? What did I sign up for?
Why do we break up? It's upsetting. The second guy I got with after my ex had a micro penis. Literally my pinky.
What did you do when you saw it? It wasn't a seeing it thing. It was like is it in yet? Is it in yet?
I had no idea. Like it was like this thing. I swear to God. You've actually tried to have sex with micro penis.
I did have sex with micro penis. What position worked the best? None of them. I was on a bean bag in my friend's like common room and call it.
So disgusting. Wait. Can we talk about karate? Yeah.
The karate kid is here today. Hey guys. It's a fun fact that I am a brown belt and karate. I did it for nine years.
I wasn't like an athlete. You weren't going to see me in soccer. Hockey or whatever. What other is work?
Track. No like none of them. I, my parents like usually karate. And like that's a sport you put your kids into when you're like three.
And I was out popping my fucking pussy until I was probably 17. Hold on. I'm a brown belt. Did you get like bullied for this?
Yes. So I, for a period, I stopped. And then I accidentally before I sweet 16 got alcohol poisoning because I was 14. I was young as my grade.
So I was like before I sweet 16 and I like drank too much. And my parents like you're grounded for nine months and you have to do karate. And I was like all right. Like fuck.
And I'm like 14. Like guys are just starting to notice me. And I have to go back and put my D on. I'm like a little brown male.
And I'm like cool. Yeah. Yeah. And like, I'm like guys aren't going to fuck with this.
It's true. Give me like a hand move. What would you do? You'd bow first.
Be respectful. Because I can't really get into the group. It's the I used to like do the job. I used to judge younger karate students.
What? I was not good. I was so good at karate. Do you use any of those moves in the bedroom?
Probably. I'm violent in the bedroom. I'm anti-stimmy coming. Howie.
Can we talk about your dad? Yeah. Let's talk about the finances. Let's talk about the finances.
Are you still using your dad's credit card to this day? Yeah. I mean, it's actually a sensitive topic today. I got a text this morning being like in the group chat.
My dad goes, I just canceled the JetBlue card. Good luck. Love you. To my family group chat.
I go, what the absolute fuck? He goes, you know, I don't use it anymore. I'm like, what do you mean? What does the JetBlue card like his card?
We all have an apple pay. But it's like my apple pay. It's like bang, bang, it's like, oh bang, where dinner, bang. You know, I could fly around the world 17 times.
So you got cut up on the JetBlue. No, yeah, we're done. The black card we're so back. The black card hates see me coming.
It's nice that he's not a sugar daddy. Like this is your actual dad. Yeah, the sugar daddy minus the sugar. Do you think he'll ever cut you off?
Um, no, because like he really wants us to be safe. He's big on safety. Like the reason why he would never like disclose his credit card number for the black card. He does not let us do subway transportation or Uber X.
Like it's, I'm not kidding. He like doesn't feel safe with that. He also doesn't feel safe with this having a bad haircut. We're bad hair or like bad clothing.
He doesn't feel safe. Alex. He protects our safety. I literally can't handle you.
Okay, so it's all about safety. Yeah. A new bag. Safety.
Yeah, new hair. Safety. But also like, but also like nice interior design. Makes me feel safe.
The CB2 safety. William Sonoma safety. Revolve. Revolve makes me feel safety.
So let me get this right. Do you have a like a you can't spend more than this in a month or no? I'm not disrespectful. I don't want to use it.
It's like I'm going to burgdorff and like popping my abs with pussy upper door while he's out there. But when I'm there, we're probably right. You know, ever go too hard. What is like a reprimand from your father?
It's an email. It's an email where it says purchase activity not detected or like purchase activity. I wasn't there. And he sends a question mark and we just usually don't reply.
Stop. I'm like trash. Bam. My quiz list.
Okay, let's talk about your dating life. Okay, let's talk about your dating life. Okay. Do you have an age limit?
Um diapers. Is that bad to say? What's funny is I was thinking like 85 65. Yeah, diapers.
Oh, yeah. I don't know. You're an old man. Yeah, an old man with diapers.
Hospice. Diapers. Wait, what? Who's going to talk about younger?
And that's the problem. We have to talk about that. Okay, that was weird for me. Um, can you tell me what is the oldest you've gone on a date with?
Date or fact? I don't know. The old guy I stopped with. I don't date a lot.
Okay, right. Sorry. No dates. Just like.
But the oldest guy I have stopped with is probably 52. Okay. How was that? Good for him.
I stuck in sideways and fruition. He sounds sunset. I think. Have you ever had sex with a man and then realized he was married after work?
Yes. How do you handle that? I mean, what? That's not my problem.
If you are hooking up with me and like your relationship and you don't disclose it. I don't see how that's like my issue. It's not your issue. What is the most expensive thing a man has ever bought you aside from your father?
That's a good question. Actually, um, I mean these guys, this man thought he bought my tits. What? This is actually a really good story.
Share with the class. So this is the guy I was seeing at the time. He was in London. I'm her face.
I mean, he was horrible to me. Like he'd be like, I'm getting this influencer and that influencer. I'm like, okay. But I'm like, I'm so cool with that, whatever.
And I would be like, I think I want like new tits. And he was like, I think I agree with that. Like he was horrible to me. And then he goes, he's like, it's six am in London.
I'm so fucked up. I'm sitting up. Hey, like I'm going to Venmo you, 10 grand for your tits. So him and his best friend, Venmo me for each tits.
So these think they own one tit. But then, wait, they've been mowed you? No, they've been on the spot. Him and his friend?
Yeah. But then my mom was like, wait, if you really want me to pay for the surgery, just get real estate license and I'll pay for it. So like my guy, I have her on the fucking keyboard. I studied so hard.
I got my real estate license and like within like a week and a half, I swear to God. And these fucking dumbass billionaires, like pocket of their money is so quick. So you get back and later. You had 10k for your tits from them.
Yeah. Pocket. I just paid for them. I never sold a house ever either.
I fucking love that for you. No. Have you ever signed an NDA? Yeah.
Oh, have you? Like what? No, no, stay. For like a, um, I know you can't talk about it, but not for like business.
I've never signed an NDA. I don't know. Like I've signed a couple. But like for like guys, I don't even think deserve them.
Like YouTube guys, I'm like, be so fucking real right now. You signed an NDA for me. No. Have you fucked someone that does YouTube?
Multiple. Actually my own channel. Wait, but you've never fucked David Dobrik. Have you?
I'm shaking out my sunglasses for this. You. Okay. Are you fucking nice?
My eyes are like, where am I? Okay. We might as well, we might as well. Wait, yeah, we might.
Okay. You thought I fucked David Dobrik? No. I'm out of here.
Can we keep that in? Can we keep that in? What is the weirdest thing that someone has asked you to do in bed? Probably the weirdest thing that guys, anything asked related.
This one guy got on all four, and he was arching his back, and I was eating his ass out. I didn't love that for me. He loved that for him. Also, there was this one guy.
That had the extension bar. I told you about this. No. This fucked me up.
Talk about it. No, I'm not. This is the hogtie was fucking light work. The hogtie was not even the part.
I just part of the story. I didn't explain it. This guy had an extension bar, and he had shit like, I hope you can see this right now. He had like the clanks here and the clanks on each ankle.
And there was a bar in between my legs. And if you move your legs like another inch, you can't go back in. So if you move your legs another inch, you can't go back in. So I was in like the splits for like three and a half hours, and I swear to God, I wasn't going to fly back from LA.
Cross-eyed, dislocated. Let me just say this. Howie and I are sitting next to each other in LA, having a cocktail. That's easy.
We're whispering sweet, nothing, sweet, I'm like, I love you. I'm asking her just about her escapades. And she starts talking about this machine, essentially. That she was getting home depot PR hall.
It's like a curtain rod between her fucking legs, but there's a spring. And when you said that, so is this happening when you're getting fucked from behind? No. So like I was on my back in the hog time.
That's what made it crazier, the hog time I was in front. And I felt like a chandelier at one point. Yeah. He put the bar over his neck at one point, and then flipped me over.
It was like, I can't move your legs. I thought I pulled a hamstring, Alex. I thought I was needed PT after this. Wait, what?
I had recently watched the Jake Gyllenhols show. Oh, you thought it was what to say? I got a video of it. I was like, oh, I'm shocked.
No, I, while she was explaining this to me, had watched the Jake Gyllenhols show, if any of you had watched it, it's like presumed innocence. And the girl is murdered, and she's wrapped up in a hog tie. So aside from a hog tie, what is a weird thing? Like a weird thing that would make Halle Batch, I'll definitely be on the Richter's sale of weird that a man has done today.
I mean, nothing makes me blush, but this one thing made me fear for many lives. I'm not gonna lie. Like this man was love bombing, the absolute fuck out of me, in a way where I was like, aware it was happening. But there was one that he called me, and he always would call me, spend two hours on the phone talking about fucking nonsense.
I don't fucking talk about it. I'm trying to go to bed or order Uber Eats. I don't know what fuck you're saying. So he called me up and he's like, I wrote a short story about you.
And I'm like, oh my god, like trying to be like so cute, and like interested. What was it about? And he's like, I wrote it about you. And like, you were in my muse.
And I was like, I've never been amused before. Really, like, tell me everything. I'm like, tell me every time I'm hot. I'm like, tell me every time I'm in detail.
This story was basically like, this random girl gets set up with this guy that works on her ranch. And they go on her first date, it's a blind date. And like, he like teaches people how to shoot a gun. And she's like, I'm scared of guns.
Anyways, she's like, whatever, they continue dating. And she keeps using the gun to like masturbate, to like fuck herself with the gun. She's like popping her pussy with the gun while he goes to work. Okay.
And I was like, okay, this is a really good story. So he's like, yeah, like then she uses the gun. It's like a rifle to pop her pussy out of wear. Well, anyways.
And there was this gun. One day, the end of the story was he walks in because he forgot his wallet or something. And she's like using the rifle to masturbate and accidentally shoots her whole fucking head off. Like, I go, that's so sweet.
What? I'm like, we're so, um, so I'm like, this girl below is her brains out. And I'm, I'm the moose. I'm like, what?
I'm like, I've never even talked about masturbating with this guy. But all of a sudden, I am popping my pussy with a rifle. Dude, isn't that fucking insane? I feel so like she walks in and like, it's like, he like, she's like, oh my God, you walked in.
Like, like what? Here's the thing. I do feel like life is about how you handle moments. And I do feel like of any woman in the world for a man to share that kind of short story.
You are the type of person that could maybe handle it better than another woman. Cause like some bitches would just literally start like crying on the phone being like, why would you tell me this? But you're like, I said, thank you. And then when you got off the phone, do you like call your friends or do you just like, pick back up your, that one's, I mean, like, I can like handle a fucking weird, weird, like dirty tax or whatever, but like a weird two hour story about like how I blew my head off with a rifle via master meeting.
I didn't really know what handle. So yeah, I was like, I don't handle this. I was like, I don't handle this. Well, I'm about to visit him, whatever.
And they're like, honestly, period, not the period per what's still do it. I still visited him and I came. Hallee. Yeah.
Hallee. Alex. I couldn't get on that flight. I'm too paranoid.
I think he was gonna fucking kill me. I mean, her podcast is gonna be fucking insane. You're literally lounging like, which story should I tell about him? The hog ties?
I would even consider that bad sex. That was good sex. You enjoyed that. I like that.
What is the worst sex you've ever had? What would you consider bad sex? There was this one guy hooked up with where he had like this weird baby fetish, like where he thought it was like a doll or like a baby doll. And he was like, oh my pretty little princess, my little girl, my little, my little, pretty little princess.
And I was like, who the fuck do you think you're talking to? He was like, just my pretty little princess, maybe fucking fed. And I was like, do you need to be fucking murdered? Because I'm like, you're not gonna be right now.
No, about today, but should I'm not into freaking the weak? I'm gonna ask you some rapid fire. Okay. Who is the most famous person in your DMs?
You know this. You can't say it. You want me to say it? No, we're here.
Or do we want to let you like hook up with him first and then? Yeah, I mean, there's a lot of famous people on my DMs. How do you handle that? Do you like that?
No, well, I mean, they're all fucking weirdo losers. I feel like as a grown up, I feel like, I'm like, oh, be so cool with like a famous guy and they're like, oh, these famous people are fucking weird freaks. Like Scott Dissick. Get out of my DMs.
Weird fucking weird freak. Okay. Have you ever hooked up with your friend's boyfriend? Yeah.
Well, like it's Memorial Day weekend. And like she can send it. I mean, like she was like, second sideways. I said I was like, I'm diagonal.
No. Can I tell the story? Yeah. You heard how the story.
But I won't tell who it is. No, like please tell the story because I want to tell the story so bad. I think it's hilarious. It shows how close me and Lauren are.
She loves the story. Is she okay with it going by like? Okay. So Holly and I are with Lauren and we're with Braden.