Have The BEST Sex At 40+ (fix your relationship instantly) With Dr Karen Gurney episode artwork

EPISODE · Sep 22, 2025 · 1H

Have The BEST Sex At 40+ (fix your relationship instantly) With Dr Karen Gurney

from Is It Hot In Here? Midlife Podcast · host Dr Naomi Potter

Think your sex drive has disappeared in midlife? You might be surprised to learn that “sex drive” isn’t even real. Visit Menopause Care for more info on navigating menopause and sex & relationships: https://www.menopausecare.co.uk/what-to-expect-ihihIn this episode of Is It Hot In Here?, Dr Naomi Potter sits down with Dr Karen Gurney, a clinical psychologist, psychosexologist, and bestselling author to reveal what women in their 40s, 50s and beyond really need to know about improving their relationships.From how much sex you should actually be having, to what we've all got wrong about desire, Karen shares practical advice that every midlife woman should hear.If you’ve ever worried your sex life is 'broken', this episode will change how you think — and help you rediscover confidence and enjoyment in the bedroom. And it doesn't even have to be tricky! Listen along, take some notes, and be prepared for an almost-instant improvement!Follow Dr. Karen Gurney below:Karen's Instagram: @thesexdoctorKaren's clinic: https://thehavelockclinic.com/ Follow Dr. Naomi Potter below:Naomi’s Instagram: @dr_naomipotterNaomi’s TikTok: @dr_naomipotter00:00 – Intro to Dr Karen Gurney 00:49 – What a clinical psychologist / psychosexologist actually does05:06 – How we learned sex wrong: media myths & the standard script07:21 – The 'three times a week' myth 09:58 – What we get wrong about desire 11:05 – “Sex drive” isn’t a thing: desire redefined17:22 – Pain, pressure & routine as desire killers18:48 – Does less sex harm relationships? What the data says22:40 – The orgasm gap & why the script fails most women31:18 – The keys to rebuilding desire in long-term relationships32:34 – Building “sexual currency”: flirting, touch & zero pressure36:16 – When attempts don’t lead to sex (and why that’s OK)39:16 – How to start “the talk” without blame42:23 – Intentional effort: the couples who keep desire alive47:29 – New relationships in midlife: a chance to reset49:56 – Lube & toys: why they’re not “cheats"52:04 – Is culture improving? 53:41 – Listener Question: “I’m happy not having sex — is that OK?”54:16 – Listener Question: Body confidence after menopause1:00:01 – Final thoughts#karengurney #naomipotter #relationshipadvice

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Have The BEST Sex At 40+ (fix your relationship instantly) With Dr Karen Gurney

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