healing & helping others heal from relational trauma with Kirsten Bunch

After witnessing so many of her LGBTQ+ coaching clients experiencing relational trauma in their workplaces, Kirsten Bunch signed up for an intensive program of study on the topic. Was the universe laughing or helping when, just as the course was starting months after she signed up, her partner of 18 years ended their relationship in a way that she described as including a “denial of [her] queer identity”?The place where I got teary, though, was when Kirsten talked about her surprising discovery of queer community in the small Georgia town where she moved – from New Jersey! – post break-up. Find show notes at: https://rawzcoaching.com/kirsten-bunch***About Kirsten Bunch | life & career coach for the LGBTQ+ community, new Southerner, inherently worthyKirsten Bunch is a writer, speaker and certified leadership and career coach who helps LGBTQ+ professionals get promoted to leadership positions without sacrificing their queer identities. A former multi-million dollar nonprofit fundraiser and executive leader for global nonprofits, she helps clients overcome the trauma, unexamined storylines and fear-based beliefs that hold them back in their professional and personal lives. Get your free The Out CEO Checklist at https://careerhelp.kirstenbunch.com/checklist***All Up in It is a project by coach SB Rawz focused on telling stories of growth and change from the thick of learning. Learn more about SB & her projects at https://rawzcoaching.com***Some key moments in our conversation:Kirsten is a life and career coach for the LGBTQ+ community; she’s also single after an 18-year relationship ended in a way that has inspired her to explore how all of her identities intersect and her true, inherent worth as a humanShe helps individuals heal and self-actualize so they can do the systems workShe’s learning while helping people navigate relational trauma ie healing from toxic relationships whether professional or personalThe expanded focus on/awareness of trans and non-binary people has some people treating these identities as new despite the reality of trans and non-binary humans always having existedThe ways social narratives can adversely impact individuals in a domino effectKirsten’s study of relational trauma was spurred by her career coaching work and then coincided serendipitously with her tough break-upLearn/share/learn and omg/cool! cyclesThe shaky ground where Kirsten is finding freedom during this time of change; and it’s also excruciating depending on the momentEmbracing the no-knowing and the opportunity to learn who she is nowHer surprise at discovering she’s liking her new life in the South including living near cows and discovering queer community in small town livingHer tools include her whole coaching toolkit, writing, intentionally navigating distracting/self-soothing and sitting with the feelings, movementKirsten reflected on giving herself space to distract during a post-break-up time when she couldn’t process until she noticed that she had the bandwidth for processing and being elsewhere in her lifeOrganization spotlight: The Trevor Project, an organization whose mission is to end suicide among LGBTQ+ young people via crisis and community services.