Healing Vs Moving On Ep. 79

In this episode of Breakup to Blessing, we explore the crucial differences between healing and moving on after a relationship ends. Understanding these distinctions is key to achieving emotional freedom and forming healthier future relationships.

Show Notes:

• The Difference Between Healing and Moving On:

  • Moving on means being free from your ex in terms of attachment and desire. This involves not having any romantic feelings towards them and not letting emotions like resentment, anger, or jealousy prevent you from committing to another relationship.

• Healing:

  • Healing is a more complex process that varies depending on what needs healing. It can take years, especially if the relationship involved abuse, trauma, or long-term emotional pain. Therapy might be necessary to aid in this process.
  • Sometimes, you may not even realise there are unresolved issues until you are in a new relationship and get triggered. These moments reveal what still needs attention.

• Testing Your Healing:

  • The true extent of your healing often becomes apparent when you commit to another person. Real-life situations can test your emotional responses, revealing any lingering trauma. For example, if your ex's unresponsiveness caused you anxiety, this might resurface in a new relationship if not fully addressed.

• Complex Sources of Trauma:

  • It's important to recognise that unresolved trauma may not only stem from your relationship with your ex. It can be a product of various past relationships, including those with family members, which affect your romantic relationships.

• Moving On vs. Complete Healing:

  • Ideally, you should start by moving on from your ex before aiming for complete healing. Waiting to be fully healed before entering a new relationship might mean you never get into one. You can heal while in a relationship, but remember, it's not your partner's job to fix you. The responsibility is yours, though having a supportive partner is crucial.

• Supporting Each Other:

  • A partner's role is also significant. Even if they weren't part of your past, they have a role in supporting you if they want to build a future with you. A committed relationship involves embracing both the good and the difficult parts.

• The Reality of Past Experiences:

  • Everyone has a past, and the older you get, the more likely it is that you and others will have things to work on. There's no such thing as being fully healed and completely free from the past when entering a new relationship.

• Key Takeaway:

  • The minimum you should aim for is to move on from your ex—the person. From there, you can work on healing other aspects.

Show Links:

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