Helping an Addict Triumph by Ministering to the One

This is a powerful guest post by a new author (who will remain nameless). There are fantastic leadership lessons to be learned--focused on ministering to the one. Enter Anonymous Guest Author... We are called to lead a stake, ward, auxiliary, quorum or group.  Leading the many is not the way of the church.  Though it is absolutely necessary, ultimately our challenge and calling is to minister to the one.  We administer to the many but minister to the one.  Let me relate my experience of being “the one” and some of what I learned. It was several years ago and I distinctly remember the moment.  I passed my Elders Quorum President (I’ll call him John) in the hall on my way to Sunday School.  He turned and asked me if I was available for a PPI the next night.  I agreed.  As we met that Monday night, he started talking about the dangers of pornography and his personal experience fighting it.  He related his long struggle with this horrendous addiction and the repentance process he went through.  Although I was listening, I kept repeating in my mind, “Don’t ask!  Don’t ask!”  Then it happened and he questioned, “when was the last time you viewed pornography?”  I lied and said it had been in the last couple of weeks. John continued by informing me what he was willing to do to help me overcome this repulsive sin.  The next day the weight of my lie was upon me and I sent a quick text confessing my lie to John.  He lovingly responded and expressed his confidence in me.  From that point forward I don’t remember the exact order in which everything occurred.  I confessed to my wife and then met with my Bishop.  Within the course of four days I had gone from living in sin continually to coming to a realization of all that I had done. I spent the next several months working out my salvation with my Heavenly Father and truly learned the significance of the Atonement of Jesus Christ.  I met with my Bishop regularly and spent time leaning on John, his faith and determination to help me through this trial.  He would organize car pools to Addiction Recovery classes offered by the church.  John regularly checked in with me and continuously offered his support and encouragement.  Over the course of several months, John became a dear friend and one I can count on. So what is the point of all this?  Being on the receiving side of someone’s ministering provided me great insight as I now sit in a leadership position.  I hope some of these will be helpful to other leaders in their ministrations. Dedicated First and foremost, John was absolutely dedicated to the cause.  He was truly available whenever I needed him.  Whether it was a blessing late at night or a text early in the morning, he was there for me.  Despite John’s calling, family and school, he never made me feel like I wasn’t important.  As is the case in true devotion, John’s wife became involved and made herself available to my wife.  My wife made the contact and opened up to her.  This proved to be very beneficial to allow my wife time to mourn, heal and forgive. As leaders, we often feel pulled in several directions all at the same time.  We all have competing priorities but as Brad Wilcox stated in The Continuous Conversion (a book I highly recommend), “As we are thronged by people and projects all competing for our time and attention, we can trust the Spirit to touch the hem of our garments [in reference to the story of Christ in Matthew 9:20-22] and turn us about to focus on the most important need then.”  We can’t do everything for everyone but maybe, if we truly trust the Spirit we can be everything to one. We learn in 3 Nephi 17:21 that Christ, the One who suffered for each of us, ministered to the Nephite children “one by one.”  Although we always speak of the Atonement covering all sins, temptations, errors and feelings.  I have come to learn that the Atonement covers all MY sins, MY temptations, MY errors