Hold Nothing: Elena Brower on Recovery from Cannabis, Shame & Grief

In this intimate conversation, Taryn Strong sits down with beloved teacher, writer, and artist Elena Brower to explore the layered realities of recovery—including cannabis dependency, tobacco addiction, grief, and shame. Elena shares the self-abandonment loop that kept her stuck, the moment of truth that helped her stop hiding, and the simple, powerful practices that helped her rebuild trust with herself.Together, they also open into grief as a lived practice—not something to power through but something to move with—and they explore how shame can stunt our inner world…and how repair, compassion, and do-overs can restore what shame disconnects. Woven throughout is the heart of Elena’s book and journal, Hold Nothing, and the recovery medicine of storytelling, service, and self-honesty.In this episode, we talk about:Recovery from cannabis and the quiet dependency many struggle to nameThe daily internal battle: “You can do it. No, you can’t.”The role of hiding in addiction - and how shame feeds secrecyWhat helped Elena quit cannabis (and what replaced the ritual)Recovery from tobacco and the emotional roots underneath the habitWhy substances often function as a stand-in for connection and solitudeGrief as a practice - learning to respect pain and exhaustion as pathways of healingBuilding altars, talking to loved ones who have died, and honouring impermanenceShame stress, nervous system repair, and the power of relational “do-overs”The phrase ‘how human of me’ as an empathy-based pattern interrupterElena’s service work: hospice volunteering, teaching yoga in prison, and supporting formerly incarcerated womenA loving invitation for anyone quietly questioning their relationship with a substance or behaviourResources Mentioned:Elena's website here: books, workshops, resourcesBook: The Grieving Brain by Mary-Frances O’Connor Research on shame stress referenced: Allan SchoreNonviolent communication: Judith Hanson LasaterDeath doula course: Sierra CampbellOn The Inside: nonprofit providing rehumanizing and healing programming to incarcerated women while reducing recidivism and intergenerational incarcerationAbout Elena Brower:Elena Brower is a bestselling author, artist, mentor, and yoga/meditation teacher. Known for her depth, honesty, and devotion to practice, Elena creates resources that help people meet themselves with clarity, compassion, and courage—including her journals and the book Hold Nothing.About SHE RECOVERS® FoundationSHE RECOVERS Foundation is a non-profit public charity and a global grassroots movement serving thousands of women and non-binary individuals in or seeking recovery from life challenges including mental health issues, trauma, and substance use. SHE RECOVERS is dedicated to redefining recovery, inspiring hope, ending stigma, and empowering women to increase their recovery capital, heal themselves, and help other women do the same.If you found this conversation helpful and you are able, please consider donating to our lifeline organization or sharing it with others who may benefit. We would love to also receive your rating and review of the SHE RECOVERS Podcast on your favorite platform.Visit sherecovers.org to donate today.