Holiday Budget Busters

And back on the show with me today is Life Coach Kathy Jo, Pauli, how are you today Kathy Jo? Terrific, how about you Paul? Hey I'm doing wonderful and it's always good to hear your voice and kind of a serious topic, but we do have some fun with this one. Holiday budget busters, and it's hard to believe it's time to talk about it again, but here we are, it's that time here.

Here we are, and I have to back up this. Sure. One thing you said that makes me smile, anything that we don't have fun with. Yeah I know, I think, yeah, any topic we have a good time with it, don't we?

We do, and I think that says a lot. It doesn't always have to be gloom and doom. I know we're talking about holiday budget busters and money, we talk a lot about finances. But you know, there's still always kind of a silver lining or a positive way to look at things if you dig a little deeper.

Absolutely, and whether that's digging deeper to find that extra change in the couch, cushions are between the car seats, every little cent, especially this time of your counts and anything. And I like that. You can save counts too, right? That's right, that's right.

Save, run to those cushions, dig out your coin jar, but don't build that exactly. You've got it. See already, already you're thinking. And if anybody's wanting to think, how can I reach out to Kathy Jo, your website, lifecoachcathyjopolic.com, correct?

Yes, you've got it. A-P-H-Y-J-O-L-L-A-C-K.com. There's a contact me on the left hand side with all the different ways you can contact me. And please, I welcome comments, questions after you from everyone.

And Kathy Jo, when we talk about budget busters, holiday budget busters, more importantly, that's where we start with this. Because I mean, I'm thinking we can start pretty much anywhere, but I'll let you take the lead on this one. Yes, we can start anywhere. Yes, we could.

But let's get started. Well, you know, some of the things we've talked about in the past, and thinking about myself, because it is always personal to some degree. And we can share things. But one thing that jumped out at me, and I'm going to put you on a hot seat like I always do, but there's a theme that I want people to remember.

And I thought we could open with it and close with it. Tell me what you think about it. It has to do with holiday joy. And it comes from within each of us.

And we cannot buy that for starters. That's exactly right. You touched on a key word that I often, I mean, I try to remember all year round, but especially the holidays, you said joy, which that's, you know, the joy principle. Jesus others you.

That's how that goes in life. So that's the joy principle. So when you said joy, that made me really think. That triggers that.

Yes, it does. I'm glad that you pulled that in. That's absolutely right. So when you think about how you feel that it really comes from material objects, what does it come from?

So before we dig into our talk, I want you to look at last holiday season. OK. OK. What do you remember about the holidays last year?

You know what I had what I remembered about the holidays last year. It was I enjoyed it. It was I had everything done. I didn't overdo it last year.

This year's a whole nother story, though. I'm not so well on track for this year. I'll credit cards are going to be smoking past February, probably. But the holidays, you know, I had everything in line and kept track of everything much better last year and less stress when we came around.

And I enjoyed the time enjoying time with family is really what it all came about. Having that, you know, around the table dinner, you know, the presence and things are nice. But as you said, that's not really money and objects don't buy happiness. It was that spending time with family and friends that those people, you don't get to see that often.

That's really what holidays to me is all about. That's a gatherness that you love and care about. And that's really what sticks out to me. I cannot even remember the gift specifically from last year.

And you know what, I think to myself too, we're always a society that feels obligated to buy. I don't understand that everywhere. It is. And it's like, you know what, the bank account can only go so far.

That's exactly right. There are limits to everything. Don't push the limits. Don't add to your stress.

So you think about what you remember from last year. And what went well and why it went well. And as you said, you really stuck to your priorities, you stuck to your list. And it was less dreadful and more enjoyable.

And I don't want to maybe we'll come back to maybe I should just put this out there right now. So what happened this year? Well, you know what, I didn't keep track of things as I should have. And so in that when you have your list stick to it and then don't say, well, Johnny now need to buy this for so and so.

And you already had things and it's like, well, wait a minute, I need to add something extra on. That's not enough. And that's not enough. You were not organized.

Exactly. OK. But I mean, I'm not completely off the track. The train's not completely off the tracks, but not as good this year as it was last year.

And I want to tell you, Paul, if the train starts to be rallying, please reach out to me. I sure will. And I want to help get you back on track. We'll talk about early.

Maybe we should do this earlier then, so that the train can get on track. Exactly. And we need to back it up to October 1st next year. You know, we probably should.

And I think that's a good idea for next year. Yeah. So hopefully, I mean, there's a lot of people that really don't get real. I know a lot of people that they don't even think buying things for Christmas, holiday get together, what have you or whatever it is that people celebrate and how they celebrate it.

Don't usually think about it so after Thanksgiving. I'm one of those in my mind's in Christmas mode. You know me and probably people, listen, I'm almost year round, especially as we get toward July. I want to get to bring you so much joy back to the joy again.

And if it makes you feel good in it, then I think it's wonderful. It really is. And I know it brings you so much happiness. So let's talk about maybe just going back over our priorities.

OK. OK. And this is a good thing to do. Anybody listening really think about what the holidays mean to you.

What are you celebrating? How do you want to celebrate it? What's the meaning and how can you best achieve that? OK.

Gather your family, your friends who were ever close to you that you're spending your time with. Have those conversations early and now so that you can be prepared and planned. But you've got to prioritize what is really important and write it down. And if you feel obligated, you know, because a lot of people, you know, they and people like to give and receive gifts.

Nothing. Obviously, that's what the holiday season. We enjoy that. But maybe I've always said this one way.

The adults, because to me, when it comes to buying gifts, it should be more about the kids anyways. But when it comes to the adults, maybe a nice ornament exchange. You take a permanent marker and as I've always said on the bottom of it, you write to from the years as that person has that and gets that out of every year. They remember who got it for them.

Always that nice and ornament exchange. Yeah. You can't go wrong there. Correct.

And gifts are somewhere in the mix. So you have to have the discussion about gifts. Who are we going to get to? Are we going to exchange?

What's our limit? Do we even want to exchange? Or can we do something simple like an ornament? Can we make something?

Would we rather get a gift of time and really think beyond just going and buying something and buying, buying more and more and more? Don't be afraid to say, you know, maybe we'll not do the gift exchange this year and just do a nice card. Exactly. Because it's a new tradition, a new celebration or the ornament.

I love that. I don't know for a lot of people, but you know, it's been a little more rough year. You know, and so the financial wise, it's like, you know, kind of try to try to trim where you can because, you know, it seems like cost of everything increases and there's just not as much to go around as there was last year. And you're right.

So why avoid that? Why pretend it's not here? Most of us do have a tight budget. There's a limited amount.

We don't have unlimited funds to just keep spending. And I would be heartbroken if I knew somebody took money that they really didn't have to buy me a gift, because that's not the meaning of a holiday for me or our love or friendship. It's not about what you can buy for me. Yeah, because some people that may come down to buying gifts or paying bills, right?

Oh, or feeding their family. Exactly. So this is, you know, these are hard conversations to have, but they are sincere, heartfelt and honest. And we need to get to the honest meeting and how do we want to celebrate?

And if gifts are in there, what do you want to do about them? How do you want to handle it? And then certainly we're not here to tell anybody what to do just to really be introspective and think about it, because you don't want to start January. And that's another thing that breaks my heart.

People overspend over the holidays thinking they're going to make people happy and everybody's miserable come January when the bills start rolling in. That's not the meaning of the holiday season. January's got a lot of things for me to be miserable anyways, because, you know, it's the holidays are over as much as I like that in January. It just seems like a long dark month and I don't need to have a bunch of credit card bills rolling in and make it adding to that because it's adding to your stretch already.

We don't need that. So make your list. Everybody right now start making lists and I would start off making a list of what you have before you start thinking what you do not have. And then you could look at your have list and see possibly what you're missing.

And I think every year I say to you, Paul, remember, I'm going to put you in the hot seat. Oh, you remember one thing that I always talk about one thing, but I don't really need the ones versus the needs when we talk about that stuff. What that is and things that we just like we say, what's the specific thing? I don't think that I talk about leave.

I think I do. I don't. Okay. That's okay.

That's okay. I think I want a new Christmas tree and every year I don't because I don't really need it. And then I put it up and I think, you know what, this really does look nice. I don't need to go buy a new Christmas tree.

I'm laughing because I know why I don't remember that because I have a new Christmas tree. I know and you have many. Yes, I do. At least seven to be exact.

And there's some that don't even get put out and I bought a new one. Oh, well, you know, and I want to be I know you did and actually thinking back. I know you have way more trees than I do, but they bring you happiness. They bring you join.

You're not back in the bank and you know, I say good for you. I don't think I'm breaking the bank. I could be a little bit. I don't think I am.

I don't think you are either. But actually last year, I think it was last year and I might have showed it to you. I love bears. So I did buy a little stuffed bear with a Christmas tree on a flag.

I can't remember that. And you posted a picture. I think you sent me a picture of it too. I think I posted it online.

So I guess I compromised with myself. I bought a little one, not not. I probably didn't need it with a compromise with myself. So in a way it was a tree, but I I haven't bit the bullet and bought that big new family tree because I don't need it.

That's time to do it. Take it from the pro. It's time to do it. You are a great influence on me.

I'm not going to come to the pressure. I'm not going to do it. It's not too late. So check your savings.

You're going to have your list of what you have. You're going to start thinking about what you need. The keyword is need not want to remember my tree. You don't.

What do you really, really need and set limits and think about, of course, gift, think about food or you're going to have company into the holidays. That would be extra food. What type of decorations and cards and scams and if you're going to travel all of those things, even your utility bills, because with extra family, I know people when when they stay with it, they end up starting, they wash clothes and they do all that and it ends up running whoever they're saying. It runs their electric bill up.

It runs some mean and maybe they like it a little warmer so they turn the furnace up higher. So there are even your utility bills can go up. That's a good point. A good point.

So you could look to prior utility bills when you had a house full thing, what they are. So come January, you can meet all those financial obligations. And the key is really to stay organized. And it's amazing.

That's where you kind of fell a little short. But I want to share a website and I'm not sure if I've ever shared this website before. But it looks to me to be a pretty good one. It is called organized Christmas dot com.

And that's with a D. O-R-G-A-N-I-Z-E-D Christmas dot com. That's a great website. They actually have, I believe, yes I have.

And things that you can print out and make your own binder with stuff in your Christmas card list, your budget. I actually several years ago, I think whoever admins that are is behind it, I did reach out to that person. And I told her that I liked it. And I think I even invited the person to come on the show.

That's from the way. And I can't remember how that went. She was so humbled by it. But I can't remember why she.

But that is a great website. And I'm glad you brought that up. Hey, you're the guy that's a great guy. But he did.

And it is a great site. It is. It really is. A lot of things about gifts and simplifying.

We've got all about simplifying. And that really is the key. To simplify it, not to make it complicated. And when we talk about shopping, a buster would be to take people with you, take the kids.

Sometimes not even taking your spouse or significant other. You need to stay focused, schedule time, have a plan, stay focused, take your list, and don't multi-path. Absolutely. Keep the blinders on too when you're in stores, because all those displays out that they're set up in the front of the store, tempted to make you spend more.

It looks like it's a deal you can't beat. Just keep on going. That's exactly right. That's exactly right.

So keep that focused. And if you're going to shop with a credit card, I prefer to shop with a cash. Or if I use a credit card, it's going to be one credit card that I will pay off in full as soon as the bill comes, or even early. Whichever you prefer.

But you do not want to be carrying that to the new year. That's going to add to your stress. Absolutely. Again, we're talking with Life Coach Kathy Joe-Polic today on Weekend Focus.

Kathy Joe, give us your website again. It's KathyJoePolic.com, K-A-T-H-Y-J-O-P-O-L-L-A-A-C-K dot com. And if you go to the links page of my website, you will see two holiday articles in green. One is hold on to read and tips for the holiday season.

And then also another favorite topic that we've discussed is reducing the stress of holiday family gathering. So that is on there as well. So some good information on there. Absolutely.

And stick with us, you said make those lists. And I looked at it twice. That's all I said. I sound familiar, right?

I'm real bad. Where did you get that? Yeah. I just said that and didn't realize what that sounded like because Santa Claus is coming to town.

But yeah. So when Santa comes to town, you want Santa to be happy to with what he sees left in your bank account. You want him to be disappointed. I don't think he's going to bring us money in that sleigh, right?

That would be nice. I don't think so. I have a couple of favorite budget budget that I thought we could talk about. Sure.

Panic buying. What I mean by panic buying. Okay, Kathy, just your top three budget busters. It's a good one here.

I think so. And I think we fall prey to it. I do. Hey, I do.

Believe me, I do. And number one is panic buying. Panic buying. Do you know what I mean by that?

Panic. I'm trying to think. Well, I'm trying to think, okay, I didn't get so and so enough. So I need to add this to it.

And you're out there and you're like, oh, and you're really at that point when you panic by you don't think it costs. You don't think it costs. You just think, I got to get that. That's intimate.

To make someone so happy. Everything does go out the window. It's emotional. You think I need to buy another gift for mom and dad or little Johnny.

He's had a tough couple of months. Her, my parents are getting older. I want to buy them more. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.

Is what I have to tell you. Okay. And I want to ask you. Will buying anyone more make them love you anymore?

No. Okay. It shouldn't. No, it shouldn't.

Because if it does, then there's bigger problems there. That's right. The normal person? No.

And buying more isn't going to fix the problems. No, no, it's your is just going to add to it. It is in so many ways. So resist that emotional panic mind that you need to buy someone more and what I would suggest to you If you're feeling I need to buy buy buy spend spend more think about how you can create a memory Okay, buy more items, okay?

Okay, if you any ideas help me out here. Well, maybe a beautiful holiday photo I like that frame and give to that person a photo collage of all the time that you've enjoyed together You know photos and things that you can do with them are amazing now I couldn't paint a picture to save my life But I know a lot of people that can paint and maybe even if somebody's a painter and they take and paint that person You know paint them some kind of a picture something they might think they enjoy and give that to him But we have something from the heart is speaks volumes and that person will display that and like if it's a Christmas scene in the Christmas time Maybe you're around but they'll always have that and that's creating that memory You'll have that hanging on your wall and it's like that person's right there with you That's right and that have a lot more meaning running to the department store and buying box gift Mm-hmm, it sure does and that's beautiful I can think of so many things that people have made me good friends over the years that I probably have on my walls and That means so much more so think about creating a memory Something that my mom just so enjoys is when I pick her up take her out and we have a day to celebrate Maybe a nice lunch, but you know Just what would they enjoy to spend their time doing with me and creating that memory and maybe taking a picture everybody taking pictures With their smart phones, and you know sharing that to think about that memory and it is funny And it has kind of goes bad. I'll share with you this but when you go out and you start doing your holiday shopping My number two budget buster is being tempted to buy for yourself Oh, and see I say that's the selfish side of me comes out because I'm like oh You because if somebody's with you like oh you're buying that for I'm looking like well me of course Then you feel really bad. It's like yeah, that's not the point.

I'm out here not supposed to be shopping for me Right, right? I don't say I mean treat yourself Certainly but when you think this is the season of giving not receiving and my mom's always a good one She's oh yeah, go ahead and get that treat yourself with that I don't I that's that's hard and I say no mom no no no no I really enjoy when I'm giving and not receiving especially over the holiday season and it's not really selfish to treat yourself But you have to keep again, I'm gonna go back to your organization and your focus It's a relief stress get the items on your list and then you know move on and something for me And I'm bad about doing this myself because I haven't sent out one and in several years I love to receive Christmas cards. Oh, yes I don't hear people say that too much anymore because we're a society that's so quick to text send an email Which don't get me wrong is seeing a text from a friend maybe I haven't talked to for a while That says hey, I hope you have you and your family have a great I love those two don't get me wrong those mean because it means somebody at least they took time out and they thought of me So don't get me wrong love those but something about that Christmas card because I keep my cards And throughout the year if you're going through stuff I keep them in a certain place I'll go back there and look who wrote this to me because text eventually those get deleted phones get changed You don't get to keep all that but those cards I always have those and think about that and when you open up that card You look at that handwriting yes, and then name don't you feel this warmth? You do because that handwriting is unique.

It's one of a kind They wrote your name and you know I have cards from people that are no longer here and now I see it's like that's their stamp That's their footprint I mean you run your hand over those lettering you know that that indentation they made in that card and it's like wow the person that They're not here anymore And it's just like that one of a kind from the heart and that to me that creates that special memory And that is that just that card is special gift in my mind and that means so much more than that box gift And I love card exchanges You know just saying let's exchange a beautiful card Why don't we each find one that we think really you know just says how we feel or something cute something catchy and and make it Does a card exchange? So I'm with you on that certainly and then my third budget buster is We talked about this a little bit but forgetting that budget and plan for everything really look back to last year What trips you up spending wise? What did you forget and when you pull your family together or your loved ones and you're talking about you know spending limits and things Hey, what do we need to plan for is there anything we forgot last year? What wrecked our budget none of us want to go into debt?

So let's make sure we've got a good plan going into this and it is about it is about planning so that you can enjoy it and not feel Stressed absolutely again We're talking with life coach Kathy Joe Pollack today on weekend focus her website Kathy Joe Pollack comm and Kathy Joe I know if anyone wants to reach out to you There are several links and in contact information on your website correct. Absolutely. They can just click on contact me It'll take you right to the contact me page. I have my phone number on there my email They can just submit a form if they like and we do like to hear from everyone and we have to give a huge shout out to someone special Yes, we do.

I know who you're talking about. I know you do Nancy Redford Yes, Nancy is our faithful weekend focus listener and she loves particularly our segments She's always I know she gets in touch with you She'll even on my Facebook page She'll comment and even send me messages and uplifting things and I can't tell her how much I appreciate that So see there's there's something she has no idea. She's creating wonderful memories by that She is an absolutely beautiful spirit a lovely lady and we met through you through your show Paul I still got to meet her in person. I know she's around the area and need to get her to the station I've wanted I've been meaning to get her on the air Well, let's make that our plan for the new year because we really met sort of online and over the phone and never face the face Nancy such an inspiration.

Yes, she is so we're putting her in a hot seat now And she I know she's out there listening and she'll get in touch with us. She hears this See we'll see what we are so huge shout out to Nancy and her family for sure Absolutely and and so when it comes to holiday budget busters here just a couple more minutes just keep it simple really don't get complacent Yes, don't get complacent. We don't like to get complacent. That's one of our favorite not do work Simplify assess what's important to you and your loved ones plan right it down make your list have the courage to discipline yourself And don't fall prey to buy now pay later There's gonna be a lot of pressure to spend spend money.

You don't have to say oh you'll be able to do it next year If you can't do it now You can't do it later unless you can really afford to pay that off Don't fall prey to it because you're gonna see that bill rolling in and you're gonna say I've heard it a hundred times Why did I do that exactly and I'm thinking here as I as we talk about this Kathy Joe You know if you're racking up a lot of debt this year chances are by the time next year comes around if you're not able to you're probably Still going to be paying off this year and adding on an extra year. So that's a vicious trap a vicious cycle It is a vicious trap and cycle So if you are gonna put on on credit something long term a major item You need to make sure the item is going to outlive the payments for starters There you go, not only can you import it, but will it still be around? So do think about that and something about gift cards that I want to mention when I get gift cards I don't always run out and spend them I don't like to just waste them on things that I don't need something that's helpful with if you have some gift card laying around Why don't you use that to buy the things on your holiday list put your gift cards to good use? That's a good point and not run up more debt Think about if you've got some gift card talked away that might help take the edge off some of the expenses for the holidays You know that's just a thought to should I throw out there too?

If you've got some gift cards as long as you know where you're sure where it came from and it doesn't have anything on it Right kid. Could you re-gift a gift card? Could you do anything wrong with that? If not something you can use and it truly is something somebody can use Then I would do it.

Yeah, I don't see any harm in not doing that. I do have to be careful with it Right don't give and don't give something a gift card They really can't use just because for the sake of saying I gave them something that's even that's even that's worse than giving them nothing Correct, you know, I don't like those token. I gave you something even though it wasn't anything you Whatever ever wanted but I gave you something that's what that's not what it's all about It hasn't happened to me But I've known of people that it's happened to if you're re-gifting watch for any some people will take and write a name somewhere on Different place on a gift bag that somebody won't think to look and then somebody's why does it say to someone so from so? You know, I mean the tag and stuff you forget to so yeah, I always appreciate everything.

I've never re-gifted one thing So, but I especially anything edible. I really like that, you know being a diabetic you can't go wrong there with lots of sugar and chocolate, right? And edible gift I cannot bake. I'm not a baker So I love when somebody, you know, maybe bake me a pie or some cookies or something like that That can be a wonderful kid because that's not my talent What to see if Nancy can whip us up a batch of chocolate chip cookies?

I bet you something tells me she makes a mean cookie so she's out there listening the call is out I believe so and Kathy Joe, I always appreciate you taking time to be with us today and sure we got one minute Okay, don't skip payment. There's gonna be other pressure on the test Why don't you skip your car payment or this payment so you have more money for the holidays and you make it up next year Adding to your debt don't do that make all of your payments work for you Don't skip and remember and my closing phrase what we started with is holiday joy comes from within you and you cannot buy it and Paul And you want to share with us about joy again? I know you love Jesus first others you in your life the joy principle J.O. Y Love it.

Love it. Thank you. Well, thank you Kathy Joe for joining us and wishing you and your family the very best of this holiday season So, thank you so much. You're very welcome and the same to you Paul