Hors D'oeuvres

On this non-award-winning show, Sandra & I are joined by special guest Colleen! My only friend, which feels kinda sad now that I am typing in this description....Welcome to the episode where Sophia's bestie, Colleen, makes her unforgettable debut and proves she fits right in with the chaos. Also, Sophia's son Josh returns to question his mother's life choices in real time.Get ready for a completely unscripted hour of beautiful madness as we welcome our first-ever guest. Colleen is a true crime junkie, a budding TikTok witch, and a woman who once thought "hors d'oeuvres" was pronounced "horse divorces." In this episode, we cover:The Clone-a-Willy COVID Scare: Sophia recounts her pre-surgery panic, thinking she had COVID, only to realize her sore throat and headache were actually from a... very enthusiastic breath play session while making a mold of her pre-op parts.The Brownie That Took Her Breath Away: Colleen shares the story of her first (and last) edible experience, which resulted in a 10-hour panic attack, a Scooby-Doo hallucination, and forcing her girlfriend to watch her "not breathe" all night.The Menards Takedown: In what might be the most lesbian date night ever, Colleen's trip to Menards turns into a live true-crime docuseries when she witnesses a massive police ambush and takedown right in front of her.How Carol Killed Kathy: A tragicomedy for the ages, Colleen tells the story of how her mother with dementia accidentally ran over and killed her own sister... at a children's softball game.Sandra's Haunted Desk: The bizarre mystery of a handmade desk that starts making noises during a storm, and the even weirder story of how she traded a Pyrex dish for a giant caribou rack with a neighbor who looks exactly like a local serial killer.If you enjoy our brand of beautiful, unmedicated chaos, please LIKE and SUBSCRIBE!SUPPORT THE SHOW:Merch Store: Get your Pessimism & Pop-Tarts gear at [Shop.com/PessimismandPopTarts]! Use promo code NOT4UVA for 20% off your order.Patreon: Get ad-free episodes, early access, and bonus content! Check out our plans at [Patreon.com/PessimismandPopTarts].Music Credits:Intro Music Bed: Udio v 1Song: Strut - by EmelineSong: Moderation - LilyisthatyouAlbum Art by openart.ai Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.