How a former porn star is helping straight men understand intimacy and themselves

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit theoryofchange.flux.communityWe live in a world of unprecedented convenience. Many of us can do our jobs entirely remotely. We use our smartphones to do a million different things. Electric cars are commonplace. And you can pretty much get anything delivered in a matter of days, if not hours. There's no doubt that when it comes to commerce and communications, things have never been easier.But outside of those areas, particularly when it comes to personal relationships, many people are finding modern day life to be anything but convenient. Some people have struggled with making friends or even realizing that they need them. And in many cases, the organizations that used to help us build relationships, like churches and community organizations, are no longer relevant to many [00:02:00] of us.On the romantic side of things, modern day media, whether explicit or not, has enabled us to know what we find attractive in others, but there's absolutely no guarantee that we can get what we seek. Sure, dating websites and apps have made looking for that special someone easier than ever before, but actually finding relationships that are lasting and meaningful is often very difficult.I hope you've enjoyed the previous two episodes in this miniseries, and I'm pleased to wrap it up with a conversation featuring Nyomi Banks, a woman who's seen firsthand many of these trends I've just described throughout a very multifaceted public life which began in adult entertainment but has since taken her into a new career as a life coach and personal advice podcaster through her new program, Ask Nyomi: Bridging the Gap.In order to keep Theory of Change sustainable, the full audio, video, and transcript for this episode are available to subscribers only. The free version runs 30:12 while the paid subscriber version is 1:07:34.The deep conversations we bring you about politics, religion, technology, and media take great time and care to produce. Your subscriptions make Theory of Change possible and we’re very grateful for your help. Please subscribe via Substack or Patreon to get unlimited access.Audio Chapters (Full Episode)02:57 — Ask Nyomi: Bridging the Gap's unusual audience11:53 — Being spiritual while working in adult film15:48 — Entering a new career to help her father26:21 — A brief brush with racism in the porn business34:29 — Why didn't she see as much racism as others have noted?38:46 — On "gay for pay" in adult media40:42 — Has porn made it any easier for regular people to be non-heterosexual?43:25 — On being spiritual but not Christian or religious44:31 — Starting and stopping an OnlyFans account50:48 — Continuing her fan relationships as a lifestyle podcaster57:33 — Why anti-porn attacks are about social control01:00:17 — Why you have to love yourself before you can do anything else This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit plus.flux.community/subscribe