EPISODE · May 15, 2025 · 32 MIN
How A Simple Framework Can Help Us Communicate With Candor And Clarity
from Imperfect Mens Club · host Mark Aylward & Jim Gurule
Mark brings up the topic of communication in the context of self talk and self reflection Then he shares a framework Jim brought that he uses for communication. The triple A method Assumptions/Agreement/Action Mark is a fan Jim brings up a favorite quote of his - "The most important conversation you'll ever have is the conversation you have with yourself"…and that's a crazy person Mark shares his self talk routine Jim - simply…you have to turn the channel He shares how his mind works. He finds or creates tools to help him. That's where this AAA framework came from. He uses it to make meetings and conversation brief and productive. He does it out of respect and courtesy. It encourages personal accountability Jim jokes that everything he just said doesn't apply to women:). Joking aside, both guys see big differences, but believe them to be compliments Mark sees the conversation being about personal responsibility as they talk about Stoicism Jim distinguishes between different types of conversations and different times in our lives Clarity, transparency and efficiency are all served by the framework Mark shares the saying on his t-shirt - "What do you mean by that?" Mark shares his appreciation for frameworks…specifically Jim's AAA framework Mark says a lot of people don't like to be held accountable Jim shares a visual rendering of his framework and offers some explanation of how the framework works. Mark chimes in in agreement Mark shares his experience with people who are scared to speak up. Most people don't like candor and confrontation. It makes them afraid Jim clarifies his opinion of women as being better than men at many things Jim also clarifies that his framework is not for more personal conversations. It's a business framework Mark shares his story about taking meeting notes in his sales meeting. How 10 people handed in 10 different sets of notes Jim thinks AI tools will help with this. Transcripts. Word for word. He explains how he might use them to bring in. His framework on command. Prompts and percentages of time that people talk during the conversation Mark shares how he started handing out transcripts of meeting notes. He was surprised at how reticent people were to be held to what they said by the transcript Mark shares his stories about how he handled this before AI Jim clarifies that his framework is to be used before, during and after conversations. Not just before. Then Jim brings up our wheel to add context to our topic. He has redone it for his use in an upcoming speech. And because we haven't updated it in a while. He reflects on all the selfs…agent, respect… Both guys express their appreciation for the wheel. Their framework Jims goes over the wheel in detail Mark shares his opinion that he changes the way he communicates depending on what life area he's in Mark goes into detail about the difference between how Jim's brain works versus Mark. Jim continues to analyze how the wheel works and gets into ideology and politics as well as other levels outward on the wheel. He goes into details about the profession category. The differences between employed people and self employed people. Whose money are we playing with. Not a criticism. An observation Both guys share their father's perspective on this Mark shares the power of "WHY" and "WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT" The value is in the follow up question. Clarity and context
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