How can intimacy ruin me? How can intimacy ruin me when being intimate with others proceed in priority being intimate with me? When I'm not intimate with myself first and I decide to become intimate with others. That's a disaster waiting to happen.
Too many stories. Too many I've counseled comforted. Too many I've watched from the sidelines. People, young ones especially who got intimate with others before being aware real and true.
In other words, intimate with themselves. Leading to being violated, controlled, used, abused, getting sick and I quote infected, traumatized. And many, sadly even destroyed. First you got a B before you can do.
You've heard this before. First you got to do before you can have. First you got to know and be who you are. Before you do anything for anyone else.
Especially a longer term commitment. And then there will be no regret about what you will eventually have and pass on when the time is over. Unfortunately we mix it up and almost always instead of starting with B and then doing it having, we start with having and then we start doing and then there's no connection on with who we are. You know the 90s, the worst is movie.
I don't even know what you heard about. The German choir, Pong Cruise. And the second most impactful and unfortunately most copied line in that movie can you get? You complete me.
Intimacy with others will ruin me if I do not find completeness first in me. I remind you of the song. How do you lose yourself to someone and never lose your way? What do I think?
Most people who lose themselves to others never found themselves in the first place. Because once you truly find yourself and you get intimately acquainted with yourself, strength, weaknesses, your values, your non-goesables, your purpose, your personal God, you will guide it without your heart, without your might, without your strength. I mean not only to protect yourself but to make sure that your value and your contribution to the rest of humanity, even if it's just your family will always be preserved. But now I'm not going to be able to understand that.
But I'm not going to understand that. But I'm not going to understand that. I'm not going to understand that. I'm not going to understand that.
So I'm going to understand that. Intimacy can ruin you when being intimate with others comes first before intimacy with yourself. Another challenge is getting intimate just for satisfaction, not with purpose and reason and vision. Intimacy is getting to know self or another to the detail in every area of one's life.
What happens when you finally know completely? See it's not what you know, the Bible says knowledge pops up. It's what you do with what you know. Let me complete that verse.
Knowledge pops up but love builds up first. But anything's a one. Intimacy is a killer. If what we know, we don't respond to love.
I want to be the core of what I share a couple of months ago. Only share your heart with people who care for you, sincerely, and who listen well. Because they're those who care for you, but they're not the listen. And they're those who listen, who don't really care.
That's dangerous. So essentially getting intimate with others can ruin you and me if we're going to not forget to know, get familiar with, understand, and accept fully. In other words, get intimate with ourselves. First, secondly, you can get messy with the purpose or the goal for getting intimate isn't clear from the beginning.
Not knowing that's out, and that purpose first opens the door to misuse. And abuse drama, discouragement, if not depression.