How Coercive Controllers Use Timing to Keep You in Their Orbit

In this episode, I'm talking about something I call the Saturday text. It's never Tuesday at 10 AM when your coffee is warm and you're mentally ready. It's always when you've finally exhaled, and I want to explain why that timing is never an accident.I go deep into the way dysregulation gets used as a delivery mechanism of coercive control, including what the person sending the text is actually getting out of it, which is not just pressure relief but confirmation that they still have access to your nervous system. I also talk about co-regulation, what it's supposed to be, and how it gets weaponized in coercively controlling relationships.I share my own experience with this pattern, including the specific moment when someone I was with sent a breakup ultimatum by text while I was alone in another country, and what that taught me about the intentionality behind timing.If you're in a high-conflict co-parenting situation, still entangled with someone controlling, or just trying to understand why you're always exhausted and can never quite explain it, this episode is for you. I also talk about practical ways to start creating distance between the text arriving and your response, because your nervous system belongs to you, and so does your Saturday.Support the show*Please Note: there is a long intro that explains my services. If you do not want to listen, just fast-forward 5 mins past. This intro will be changed in future recordings to be shorter. I am not paid to record this podcast and it is a free offering. Offering my work is the only way I can sustain the podcast*Join the Patreon: https://patreon.com/Youarenotcrazy*New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your RelationshipWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: [email protected]{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner