Brought to you by the EveryDollar app, start budgeting for free today. I'm about $4,000 in credit card debt right now. I don't have any other loans, no any other thing else. And basically me and my girlfriend are talking about getting married and I've been thinking about just engaging her soon and stuff and she could be talking about homes and everything like that.
And we've been talking about the show, but I just want to know how can I tell my girlfriend that I've kind of lied about my financial situation. Oh no, you lied, what happened? So basically I only told her out like $2,000. Why did you lie, Trey?
Why? So at first, that's where I was at. And then I started just, it started racking up over time. But I did get my first, my third apartment and then not just now with you.
So let me make this, let me understand. When you told her you had 2K, did you have 2K and then you accumulated another 2 without telling her that you accumulated while you were accumulating the other 2? Yes. Okay, okay, that makes me feel a little bit better.
Yeah, for sure. Yeah, so you didn't lie to her like upfront because you've not been honest with her since. When was that conversation that you told her 2K and now it's 5K? Was that a year ago or like two weeks ago?
It was a couple, it was a couple weeks ago. Couple weeks ago. Two weeks? Yeah.
Oh, okay. Doing what again? Did you say your third apartment? What was the 2K for?
2K was used mainly for basically like a lot of the stuff that I have currently. I got a lot of new stuff that I really haven't kind of told her about you. Like what? Name it.
I got new bed, I got new bed, I got some other like pot pan, stuff like that. Okay, did you just move? Okay, so you're buying stuff for the apartment? So basically I moved not too long ago, but I've been at her apartment a lot of my time.
Understand. So just tell her. So just tell her. I'm like, I'm like, I'm moving.
What do you think will happen if you say hey, just so you know? I'm just looking now, she's listening now, but she's probably hearing me. Is she there with you or is she like at work listening? You're going to come home to your like.
You're like listening on the, yeah, I'm going to be able to come home. All right, well, hi, Trace girlfriend. This is like, well, this is like, Maury, why did you make it like this, Trey? Okay, so what's your girlfriend's name?
Can you say it? Oh, we're going to Shaila. Shaila. All right, Shaila.
Now you know, and we're trying to tell him what's happening here. He's coming home tonight and tell you what happened, but he's telling you now. So the key here is you need to start paying this off. What are you making?
What do you earn, Trey? So I originally earned about 48, but now I'm going to go around 50, because I got a four percent pay increase. So I'm going around 50 a year. At this point, I've been talking to me and her.
I've been talking about this. Like we've been talking about the show. We've been talking about the baby stuff I sent to her today. So we've been really talking and honing in.
And we've been talking about all the stuff about getting out of date. She kind of told me where she did it on her end. How much did she have? Kind of just like around eight or nine dollars.
Okay. Now, can I ask you, Trey, if you've been listening to the show, what caused you to go? I mean, you have a fine income, 50,000. What caused you to go into debt to buy pots and pans in a bed?
Why didn't you just cash flow that? What was going through your mind? So at first, the problem was that I had to get the stuff that's currently in my apartment. The like couch in bed, stuff is not mine.
It was my sister. So I had to get that back to her. Got you. So you fell in your time crunch?
Yeah. I was in a time crunch situation where like I had to, you know, kind of just kind of do it. You can do it. I see.
I see. So I just want to encourage you going forward. There's always going to be times where you feel like there's a time crunch. There's going to be times where you feel like you have to move fast.
Urgency is where the debt industry loves you when you're urgent, but you're on a car lot. You're like, I got to get a new car. Yes. I moved to, oh, go, go, go.
They find you in crisis. That's right. A hundred percent. A hundred percent.
But if you can start now to exercise the muscle of just even taking a moment, taking a breather, and going, okay, what can I do instead? Can I sleep on a friend's couch for a week while I save up some money? Yes. Can I go on Craigslist?
Or an air mattress. A hundred-hundred. A hundred-hundred. So just always know, Trey, that there is always another option.
So in a situation, whether it's furniture or a car, there are options out there. So slowing down is a really big part of making wise financial decisions, not feeling you're back into a corner. And then, and I would want to get to, and again, it's only been two weeks, so it's not like you've lived with this for months and lied to her. But I would want to know from you what's caused you to not tell her.
Is it because she'll get mad? Is it that you're embarrassed? Is it that you wish you had done better? And now you can have some guilt and shame around the choices that you've made?
What was the main motivation? Do you know? I would say, honestly, for me, the main thing, which is me and her have been talking about marriage. And we've been talking about how much we want to experience.
She's been talking about being in the low, so we can save a lot of that money. We don't just go in and have this big wedding ceremony. And she's not looking for that. I think we've been in a situation where a little bit of a bear's mind, like, you know, I didn't really want to tell her that I just did this because she's going to tell me, hey, why'd you do that?
You didn't need to do that. Absolutely. Sure. Yeah.
Even this Trey is an example of just learning that communication pattern. You had a feeling about not telling her you didn't tell her, but then even still you came on the show as a strange way of telling her, I would just want to encourage you in the future. If this is a person you love, you trust, go to them and tell them the truth. Yeah.
And starting off marriage with hiding the pots and pans, Trey. We don't want to do that. We don't want to do that. We don't want to get in that habit.
Because genuinely, I mean, secrets start to, that erodes trust so fast and as honest as you can be, Trey with her about this, and going forward. I mean, we've been married over a decade, but it was in our own husbands. Yeah. Sorry.
Not to each other. That we, I think we both say that, you know, there are things that are going to come up and like that you're embarrassed about and you're, you know, you don't like things. That's right. I mean, like that is going to happen.
And the moment you start hiding those things is where that trust erodes. So the more vulnerable and honest you can be trained, this is a great first step. And let me just say to lighten the light in a little bit that it's $2,000. Okay.
It's not, you know, it's not, you know, it's not, it can be much worse. It can be much worse, but that doesn't matter regardless of the amount. It's the principle behind it that I want you to get in a healthy pattern of you guys communicating and being off and I want you to cut up the credit. Was it credit cards that you, that you charged it on yourself?
Yeah, it was on the credit card. Okay. Cut it up. You guys have been talking and listening to the show, you've been talking about the show, listening to the show and she's doing stuff that we talked about.
So cut up the credit cards. You guys cash flow. She sounds amazing. And she's listening for all.
We are for you. We are on her team and you're on the trade, but she sounds so level headed and be wise about this, you know, if you don't have the money, don't buy it and let that start to be a pattern in your life. And that includes the engagement ring. That includes the wedding and the honeymoon and all the things.
But yeah, I think it's going to be awesome. Do you know when you're going to put? Well, no, I don't know. How long have you been together?
Right now I've been with her off and on. We were off and on for about a year now. Okay. I have been secured with her for about two going on three months now.
Secured with her. That's a good reason. I've really, really, like I've been secured. Like it's secured.
Like it's before we stopped talking for a little bit and then we got back together. Okay. Okay. I like it.
I like it. It's great. I'm excited for you all. Oh man.
Love it. All the security coming forward.