How Our Counterfeit Emotions Undermine Connection and Intimacy | Curtis Morley | #177

We sit down with Curtis Morley to learn how “counterfeit emotions” quietly disconnect couples and how authentic emotions build peace, clarity, and real intimacy. We dig into practical shifts like choosing curiosity over anger, honoring pain without turning it into misery, and removing shame so connection can grow. • Curtis’s origin story after divorce and the loss of his friend Jerry • Four criteria for spotting counterfeit emotions: connection, direction, motivation, valuation • Why peace has no counterfeit and what that means for relationships • Curiosity as the antidote to anger and a path to calmer conflict • Two marriage practices: promise to lean in and create a nightly slow-dance ritual • Anger versus advocacy and how to address injustice without burning connection • Nice versus kind and how people pleasing blocks growth • Attachment versus connection and moving from need to want • Pain versus misery, how shame and blame fuel misery, gratitude as a reframe • Sobriety versus recovery, healing underlying emotions instead of white-knuckling behavior • Love versus lust, give and receive versus take • Parenting around porn exposure, using “thank you” to remove shame • Takeaway tools: name emotions, pause before reacting, the 90-second emotion window Happy Hacks: 101 Science-Backed Ways to Boost Happiness, Reduce Stress, and Build a More Meaningful Life.Available now starting at 99¢ on Amazon and Dave's Book StoreWritten by Dr. Dave Schramm, this practical and uplifting new book offers simple, research-based strategies to help you build greater happiness, strengthen resilience, reduceThe opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this podcast do not necessarily reflect the views of the Utah Marriage Commission.Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.orgYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLifeTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelifeInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.comhttp://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com/