How Sharing Our Stories Turns Grief Into Connection With John Kammer and Nicky Perfect

This episode is part of Podcasthon 2026, a global podcast movement highlighting the work of charities around the world. For this special release on Friday 20 March, we are proud to support SHOUT, the UK’s free, confidential, 24/7 text messaging service for anyone struggling to cope.Grief can make the world feel smaller, quieter, and strangely far away from who we used to be.In this deeply honest conversation, John Kammer joins Nicky Perfect to share how repeated loss shattered his illusion of invincibility and pushed him into years of numbing inside the relentless pace of the hospitality industry. Sobriety eventually opened the door to something different — an active, deliberate approach to healing.The conversation moves from raw guilt and unspoken words to an unexpected bridge: building an ethical, text-based AI designed to help people express what feels stuck when the room is dark and the heart is loud.Together we explore why the familiar “stages of grief” often miss the mark, and instead focus on Worden’s Four Tasks of Mourning: • accepting the loss • processing the pain • adjusting to life without the person physically present • creating an enduring connection that allows us to move forward without erasing love.John explains how structured prompts can help organise scattered thoughts, make therapy sessions more effective, and turn late-night spirals into clear reflections you can take to a professional.We also step into difficult territory — men and vulnerability, the way strength is often confused with silence, and why caring for others starts with acknowledging what we ourselves are afraid to feel.From psychodrama tools such as letter writing and the empty chair, to the thoughtful design choices behind his AI project, the conversation stays grounded in dignity. No voices. No avatars. No pretending anyone comes back. Just language that gives shape to the presence we already carry.If you’ve ever wanted a simple way to support someone who is grieving, borrow this question:“Tell me about them.”Stories unlock connection. Stories keep memory alive.As part of Podcasthon, this episode also shines a light on SHOUT, whose volunteers support people across the UK through text conversations during moments of crisis. Their work reminds us how powerful a few words — and a listening presence — can be.🎧 Listen now. 💬 Share with someone who may need it. ⭐ Leave a review to help more people find these conversations.And remember — sometimes the most powerful thing we can offer someone is simply the space to speak.Resources & support (UK)Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7)PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.uk