How to Be a Decent Human When Someone Is Not Decent to You With Dr. Joseph Ciarrochi

On The Wise Effort show, Diana Hill talks with Dr. Joseph Ciarrochi, a researcher in process-based therapy and ACT, about self-righteous anger and how to stay honest and kind when others aren’t. They explore the psychology of getting “hijacked” in conflict, describing outrage and being right as an addiction (experiential attachment) distinct from experiential avoidance, with different intervention implications. Using examples like a conflict with neighbors, online outrage, and relationship fights, they discuss wise distance, not adding fuel to the fire, asserting boundaries when effective, and directing core human yearnings (competence, connection, purpose, meaning, orientation, and feeling) toward what truly satisfies rather than empty status pursuits.Related ResourcesGet enhanced show notes for this episodeBecome a Wise Effort Community memberSign up for my newsletterOrder my book, Wise Effort: How to Focus Your Genius Energy on What Matters Most, and receive special bonus gifts.Diana's EventsSee Diana at an upcoming eventConnecting With DianaSubscribe for free on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.Leave a 5-star review on Apple so people like you can find the show.Follow Diana on YouTube, Instagram, LinkedIn, Facebook, and Diana’s website.Thanks to the team, Craig and Ashley Hiatt, and Benjamin Gould of Bell & Branch for your beautiful music.Mentioned in this episode:Tell the Truth Salon Series You are invited to join me live in person or streaming online here in Santa Barbara to Tell the Truth Salon Series. This is something that I have been dreaming up for a while now. I want us to gather in person, online, and have real conversations, unedited, unscripted, with people who are change-makers in our world, but also to uncover our own inner truths. https://drdianahill.com/salonTell the Truth Salon Series