How To be Happy? - What Causes Sadness And Suffering?

Nanak Naam podcast by Satpal Singh on the nature of Happiness & Sadness, covers:* Common myths * Causes of suffering/sadness? * How can I overcome my pain?  Myths we live with * We cannot help moving between these two feeling as it is a normal & healthy part of life * Pleasure is better than pain * Pain and pleasure are independent opposites and not linked to each other   Gurmat tries to create conscious humans - actively aware of their thoughts, so the goal is * To reach a neutral state of bliss to all circumstances and situations in life. * Constant tranquillity or 'sehaj' (not the same as excitement or happiness) * Is this possible - yes, this is how you should judge/asses our own progress.  Causes of suffering * Desires (I want = I don't have) * Ownership       * Body-mind identity       * Ownership of possessions and people * Delusions of permanence       * Death - we say things like "I lost my father" * Control       * People should act how I want them to. Everyone acts according to his or her own conditioning.  Solutions * Choose not to focus on the negative       * Suffering and anger continues as long as you keep narrating the same story to yourself        * Your mood immediately changes when someone calls or rings the doorbell       * Music is an instant mood-changer. * The past is not your reality now       * "I cannot change past but I choose happiness now" * Be impartial to everything       * Don't prioritise pleasures over suffering.             * All pleasures received in the past have faded, leaving you wanting more (so pleasures lead to desires and suffering)         * Don't judge anything or anyone's actions as good or bad               * In hukam there are only occurrences                * These labels only reflect how they affect us.  * Predict unpredictability       * Let go of expectations       * Expect the unexpected       * Anticipate and get comfortable with the ever-changing nature of reality. * Treat Praise and Criticism equally       * When you are criticised - think about how that can serve you? (Fareeda burrai da bhalla kar) * Live in gratitude and grace       * Focus on what you have and not what you don't have       * ਦਸ ਬਸਤੂ ਲੇ ਪਾਛੈ ਪਾਵੈ ॥ He obtains ten things, and puts them behind him; ਏਕ ਬਸਤੁ ਕਾਰਨਿ ਬਿਖੋਟਿ ਗਵਾਵੈ ॥ for the sake of one thing withheld, he forfeits his faith. ਏਕ ਭੀ ਨ ਦੇਇ ਦਸ ਭੀ ਹਿਰਿ ਲੇਇ ॥ But what if that one thing were not given, and the ten were taken away? ਤਉ ਮੂੜਾ ਕਹੁ ਕਹਾ ਕਰੇਇ ॥ Then, what could the fool say or do?       * Start to use the 'Thank-you' mantra       * Treat each moment as a gift          * Bahuta Karam Likhiya Na Jae, Vadda Daataa Til Na Tamaee - Japji Sahib