How To Lead People Effectively: Understand Them First

In this episode of The Expert Method, Ian sits down with Jay Jacobson to explore what effective leadership actually looks like when pressure rises, emotions escalate, and there is no clear playbook to follow.Drawing on 45 years in funeral service, Jay shares lessons from moments of real crisis—including his experience responding after the United Flight 232 disaster in Sioux City—and explains why strong leadership begins long before the crisis itself. At the center of his approach is a simple idea: you cannot lead people effectively if you do not first understand them.Ian and Jay discuss the importance of presence, how great leaders slow a room down, why interpersonal skills may become more valuable in an AI-driven world, and how personal values help leaders make better decisions under pressure. They also explore crucial conversations, emotional regulation, mentorship, purpose, and the role families and communities play in developing the next generation of leaders.Jay is the author of Lead by Legendary Example, a leadership book built around six pillars: presence, integrity, vision, servant leadership, adaptability, and mentorship.===============Jay’s Links:- Website: https://www.jacobsonprostaff.com- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jayscookiesLead by Legendary Example:https://www.amazon.com/Lead-Legendary-Example-Jay-Jacobson/dp/1970368004===============Download the Program Execution System Toolkit:https://implementgpts.com/pestoolkit===============- My LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ian-gatzke/- Schedule Free Blueprinting Call: https://api.leadconnectorhq.com/widget/bookings/implement-ai-blueprinting===============Highlights:0:00 Episode Highlight0:46 Leadership Is Built Before Crisis1:49 Calm the Room First3:33 Presence Before Leadership5:40 Leadership Starts With Understanding7:43 Learn Leadership Through Practice9:54 Turning Chaos Into a System13:10 The Pillars of Leadership14:54 Know Your Personal Mission17:08 Values Come Before the Job18:13 How to Handle Crucial Conversations19:27 Slow Down Before You React22:09 Model the Behavior You Want24:42 The Anxious Generation28:30 Leadership Starts at Home31:27 Discover What Lights You Up34:49 The Great Pivot37:54 Let Yourself Be Mentored38:28 Make Tomorrow Better