How to Save Your Marriage | Matt Droguett

Matt Droguett is a Life Consultant and Self-Sabotage expert who is passionate about encouraging men in living whole and healthy lives, and who firmly believes in the importance of doing his own inner work. Hailing from the Hawaiian islands, he brings his experience, expertise, and attention to men caught in patterns of sabotaging their marriage, particularly through use of pornography. His dream is to see emotionally healthy people go viral. As is our custom, we talk about recovery - Matt’s passion is not about helping men quit using porn; what he wants is for them to be able to live whole and healthy lives! Porn just happens to often be one of the biggest obstacles. We further discuss the challenge of the Spiritual Bypass and why you can’t just pray away your addiction problems. We explore at some length the difference between a thriving spiritual practice that builds a strong connection with God and doing all the same religious behaviors as a way of avoiding yourself. Along the way, we talk about men and leadership, and the balance of “owning and leading your ship,” with humility. Drawing on his coaching background, and me reflecting on running men’s recovery groups, we talk about a very practical issue - how much should a person in recovery tell their partner about slips, lapses, relapses, wayward thoughts, or other means of acting out? There’s a balance to strike between overshare and deception, and we aim to articulate what that is. The important thing to remember if you have lied to and betrayed your partner is that your partner’s biggest need is for safety. Finally, we talk about the necessity for community, for spiritual practices, and for regularly doing spiritual practices in community. The Outer Circle Inner Stillness is made possible by support from listeners, patrons, likes, and shares. To learn more about how to support the podcast, visit www.patreon.com/outercircle.  Rhys Pasimio can be found through www.patreon.com/outercircle and on instagram at @newpattrencounseling and through New Pattern Counseling at www.newpatterncounseling.com, and is always happy to dialogue with listeners bringing honest questions! Matt Droguett can be found on Instagram at @mattdroguett and “The Matt Droguett Show,” on every podcast platform and on Youtube. He is further developing the ap “Uplift,” which is meant to encourage men by reminding them of what they already know about how to live well.