How to Talk to Your Partner About an Eating Disorder: Boundaries, Support, & Next Steps With Dr. Dana Harron @monarchwellnesspsychotherapy

Clinical psychologist Dr. Dana Harron joins me to discuss how couples can approach difficult conversations about eating disorders with honesty, care, and mutual respect. Together we explore what makes these conversations emotionally charged, how to prepare for them, and how partners can support each other without taking on the role of therapist or monitor. Dr. Harron offers practical guidance from her book Loving Someone With an Eating Disorder and her work at Monarch Wellness & Psychotherapy. You’ll learn what helps these conversations go more smoothly, how to create safety before and after hard talks, and when to bring in a therapist who understands both eating disorders and couples dynamics. Content Caution This episode discusses eating disorders, disordered eating behaviors, and relationship stress that can arise during recovery. Some listeners may find certain details activating. Please take care of yourself while listening, and pause or skip ahead as needed. About Our Guest Dana Harron, PsyD is a clinical psychologist and founder of Monarch Wellness & Psychotherapy in Washington, D.C. She specializes in trauma, parenting, and eating disorders. She is the author of Loving Someone With an Eating Disorder: Supporting, Nurturing, and Connecting With Your Partner and is currently writing Parenting Beyond Trauma. You can find her work at monarchwellness.com and on Instagram at @monarchwellnesspsychotherapy. What You’ll Learn How to prepare before opening up about your eating disorder to a partner Why I-statements and emotional honesty matter more than having all the answers The best times and places for difficult conversations about food and body image What to say when your partner asks questions you cannot answer yet How to plan a follow-up discussion and build routine check-ins Why post-conversation decompression helps the nervous system reset What couples therapy can look like when one partner struggles with an eating disorder How to balance support and autonomy without creating a power differential Conversation Highlights Dr. Harron shares how her book was inspired by the lack of resources for partners of adults with eating disorders. Tips for partners on when to speak, when to listen, and how to avoid meal-time conversations about food behaviors. The importance of humor, co-regulation, and small moments of levity in recovery. How systemic patterns in relationships can reinforce eating disorder behaviors. Why “honesty” in recovery is about emotional congruence, not just full disclosure. Key Takeaways for Couples Prime the moment: Let your partner know a sensitive topic is coming and ask for what you need—listening, reassurance, or space. Avoid high-stress times: Skip conversations around meals or when one partner is emotionally depleted. Plan ongoing conversations: Short, consistent check-ins build predictability and reduce tension. Use shared recovery language: I-statements and gentle curiosity create safety and understanding. Involve professionals: A therapist or dietitian trained in eating disorders can guide communication and prevent relational burnout. Related Episodes You're Not Too Much: Setting Boundaries & Asking for What You Need in Eating Disorder Recovery on Apple & Spotify. "Boundaries, Therapy While Black, & Eating Disorders" on Apple & Spotify Work With Dr. Marianne If you or your partner are navigating eating disorder recovery and want support that honors both of your needs, I offer therapy in California, Texas, and Washington, D.C., and global coaching for couples and individuals. My approach is neurodivergent-affirming, sensory-attuned, trauma-informed, and consent-based. Learn more or schedule a consultation at drmariannemiller.com. Learn With Me Explore my ARFID & Selective Eating Course to understand sensory challenges, reduce distress around meals, and improve communication within your household. Episode Credits Host: Dr. Marianne Miller, LMFT Guest: Dr. Dana Harron, Monarch Wellness & Psychotherapy (@monarchwellnesspsychotherapy) If this episode resonates, share it with a partner, therapist, or loved one who may benefit from a more compassionate way to talk about eating disorders and recovery.