I didn't know I liked pain until I tried it – Betsy

Betsy is a 38-year-old, cis-gender woman who describes herself as white, straight, monogamous and in a relationship. Betsy had sex for the first time at age 27, and after a brief period of one-night-stands, married a man whose sexual desires were significantly different than hers. She says her naturally high libido was "beat right out of me." Today, divorced and reclaiming her sexuality, Betsy is with a new partner and exploring her long-suppressed interest in BDSM. Last year Betsy came to me to do sexual communication coaching. She tells some of that story in this episode. Major themes in this episode include exploring new sexual realms (with support from a coach), navigating a changing relationship with her body, and BDSM. How Betsy started to feel better in her body by doing a sexy dance workout Her relief at losing her virginity at age 27 Betsy joins the bar scene and has sex with lots of different men Settled into marriage, Betsy and her husband had mismatched libidos Betsy's dawning desire for BDSM activities Betsy met her current partner and experienced immediate trust and opening of communication The yes/no/maybe list (download at leahcarey.com/checklist) The dynamics of a BDSM play sessions, including sub-space and post-mortem talk sessions Betsy shares some of the specific activities she and her partner do during play sessions Anal play, learning to use pain for pleasure, role playing and restraints The role trust plays in her current relationship and how it affects all aspects of Betsy's life The audio extras for this episode are: Betsy talks more about her BDSM relationship with her partner, including specific activities they enjoy and how important trust is in their relationship. Extended Q&A   Update:  Since this episode was released, the podcast has concluded. Here's how you can find me now: Book a FREE no-pressure intro consultation Keep up to date and get your FREE Three-Minute Game All my classes and downloads are at my store Any audio extras for this episode on the Good Girls Talk About Sex website Here's everything I'm up to today I no longer use Patreon — you can now support my work on Substack   EPISODE CREDITS: Host / Producer – Leah Carey (email) Audio Editor – Gretchen Kilby Administrative Support - Lara O'Connor, Maria Franco Transcript creation – Jan Acielo Music – Nazar Rybak