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'I Don't Do Very Well With Binaries' - with drag king Mr Wesley Dykes episode artwork

EPISODE · Mar 26, 2025 · 47 MIN

'I Don't Do Very Well With Binaries' - with drag king Mr Wesley Dykes

from Lost Spaces: Memories from Gay Bars, Lesbian Clubs, and LGBTQ+ Parties · host lost queer spaces

We talk a lot about — and when I say 'we,' I mean the wider queer community — how upsetting it is that queer bars and clubs are closing at an accelerated rate. But I think the bigger tragedy is the disappearance of queer cafés. And maybe it’s wrong to pit them against each other, but queer cafés offer that beautiful intermediate step. They’re not as full-on or intimidating as a bar or a club, and they’re places where you can just be. There’s no pressure to perform, no need to match the thump of a bassline — just you, your overpriced oat flat white, and the comforting hum of conversations that sound a little more like home. One of the absolute best queer cafés that ever existed — and I won't hear any counterarguments — was First Out Café in Central London. Before it closed in 2011 to make way for yet another railway construction project, it was a sanctuary. A place where you could nervously nurse a tea while pretending to read the free gay magazines that used to exist, all the while sneaking glances at the other queers who had found refuge there too. It’s also where today’s guest, drag king extraordinaire Mr Wesley Dykes, took his first tentative steps into queerdom. Growing up between Lagos and South London, Wesley navigated the complexities of identity, family expectations, and self-acceptance. And when that weight felt a little too heavy, First Out Café was there — offering a cup of tea and the reassuring presence of a community. Other episodes about First Out Cafe 'The First Gay Place That I Went Inside...' - with Alex Iantaffi from Gender Stories Podcast First Out Cafe, London (with Ali Brumfitt) Follow me Instagram: ⁠⁠www.instagram.com/lostspacespod⁠⁠ Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.facebook.com/lostspacespod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@lostspacespod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Sign up to the Queer Word newsletter: https://queer-word.beehiiv.com/subscribe⁠⁠⁠⁠ Support me Buy Me A Coffee: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lostspacespod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow my guest Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mrwesleydykes/

Episode metadata supplied by the publisher feed · Published Mar 26, 2025

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'I Don't Do Very Well With Binaries' - with drag king Mr Wesley Dykes

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This episode was published on March 26, 2025.

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