"I Had to Jump Off the Roof of a Mexican Strip Club"

"I Had to Jump Off the Roof of a Mexican Strip Club"PAFO | Featuring Kurt GarnerChris and Zoë are joined by Kurt Garner, co-host of TMA Radio in St. Louis and legacy interviewer at Sound Story, for a wide-ranging conversation about dating in recovery, attachment styles, app culture, and why sobriety doesn't just change your relationship with alcohol. It changes the entire pond you're fishing in.06:00 — Sound Story and Kurt's WorkKurt talks about his work with Tim McCernan at Sound Story, preserving family stories as digital heirlooms. The conversations he's witnessed there set the tone for everything else that follows.19:57 — Serial Putt Shack GuyKurt breaks down his 55+ first dates, his date journal, and why activity-based first dates beat dinner every time. He is unashamed. Zoë is skeptical. The debate is respectful but real.25:29 — The Vodka IncidentOn a recent first date at Putt Shack, Kurt accidentally drank vodka. As in, a bartender handed him the wrong drink. As a person sober 4.5 years. He had to decide whether to reset the clock. He did not.35:59 — The Mexico Story (Part 1)Kurt's Tulum trip takes a turn when a travel companion brings something through customs they absolutely should not have. The local police notice. What follows involves negotiation in Spanish, an ATM run in the back of a cop truck, 8,000 pesos, and the film Coco on Disney+. Kurt's fluency in Spanish was, it turns out, very load-bearing.45:46 — The Mexico Story (Part 2)There was an earlier Mexico trip. It involved a roof. That is all we will say here.01:09:08 — The App LandscapeHinge, Bumble, Tinder, Feeld, and Lucid (yes, there's a sober dating app). Kurt has opinions. Zoë has questions. Everyone has a take on when to delete them.01:34:54 — Attachment Styles, Anglerfish, and the Guinea Pig RuleKurt is anxiously attached. Zoë is avoidant and working on it. She also spent eight years in an on-and-off situationship with someone she calls "anglerfish guy" and has a firm policy about not dating anyone who has never been married. She is not trying to be anyone's guinea pig.02:03:46 — The Pond Becomes an OceanKurt reflects on how addiction shrank his dating world to a dirty puddle. Recovery blew it open into something vast and unexpected. One of the more quietly beautiful moments of the episode.02:06:52 — The Back NineBeing 40+, divorced, and figuring out what the second half looks like. Kurt is honest about the scarcity mindset that creeps in and the work it takes to push back.02:19:37 — Granny's 90thKurt's grandmother is turning 90. She has firm opinions about tattoos and birthday money. He bought full-sleeve temporary tattoos from Amazon. It is going exactly as you'd expect.SponsorsMcKelvey Insurance Group | Independent agency, no pressure, no jargon. Compare options from multiple providers to find coverage that fits you. Quote or policy review at mckelveyins.com or call 618-623-0080.Light Source Psychotherapy | Belleville, IL. findyourlightsource.comLongStory Coffee | Small batch artisanal roaster out of Belleville, IL. Light in the Dark roast available at longstorycoffee.comRecorded at the Illinois Recovery Center / McKelvey Insurance Studios.