I hired a sex worker to teach my husband how to touch me - Lynn

Lynn shares her trauma history, and then opens up on a deep and detailed level about hiring a sex worker to save her marriage.  Because no one in her family talked about sex or bodies, for much of her early life, she believed that her vagina was a fatal birth defect. Lynn is a 49-year-old, cisgender female. She describes herself as white, NOT straight, mostly monogamous, married, and peri-menopausal. She describes her body as "very average." Sex workers can play a critical role in sexual healing. It's a safe space with clear boundaries, and without the emotional charge (or baggage) often built up with a partner. A sex worker can help you overcome resistance to pleasure, focus on sensation, and figure out what *does* feel good to your body. And some do work with couples. Lynn's first memory of sexual pleasure occurs at age 9, with the accidental placement of a blanket between her legs on a hot summer night. Her surprise discovery leads to a serious misconception but she knows not to ask questions. She experiments with touching and kissing with her best friend, trying to figure things out with the benefit of sex ed. As her home life falls apart in her teens, Lynn falls prey to attention of older men. She leaves home at 16 and gets married, in order to escape things at home. Things are good at first, but when she gets pregnant, he gets violent. Lynn meets her second husband. He is wonderful and so is the sex, but life quickly throws a few wrenches into the works. The lack of sex in the marriage destroys their emotional bond. Lynn tells her husband he has permission to see a sex worker to get his needs met. He resists…at first. After some deep introspection, she suggests an alternate set of plans to her husband to celebrate their upcoming anniversary—involving Lynn visiting the sex worker. Lynn discovers her body is not, in fact, broken. They go to the sex worker together for their anniversary. Much unfolds from this and subsequent sessions with the sex worker. Lynn shares about the medical help and therapy she sought before turning to a sex worker, and her fears of social disapproval. Extras for this episode are: Lynn and I took a deeper dive into the nature of the relationships she was having with older men – was it predatory? Was it healthy?  Is it possible that it could be some combination of both?  Lynn and I talk about how, having had a history of violent homes, she managed to create a home without violence for her son. We also talk about how she approached the topic of sex with her son, and what her relationship with her body is – and how that has changed since menopause. The extended Lowdown Q&A   Update:  Since this episode was released, the podcast has concluded. Here's how you can find me now: Book a FREE no-pressure intro consultation Keep up to date and get your FREE Three-Minute Game All my classes and downloads are at my store Any audio extras for this episode on the Good Girls Talk About Sex website Here's everything I'm up to today I no longer use Patreon — you can now support my work on Substack   EPISODE CREDITS: Host / Producer – Leah Carey (email) Audio Editor – Gretchen Kilby Administrative Support - Lara O'Connor, Maria Franco Transcript creation – Jan Acielo Music – Nazar Rybak