"I Was Sat On The Kitchen Floor With A Bottle Of Wine And Drugs Coming." — James Sutton

He was in your living room every night. He played the first gay character most of us ever saw kiss another man before watershed on Channel 4. Men still message him today saying his character saved their life.Behind the scenes, he was drinking alone on his kitchen floor on a Tuesday afternoon, waiting for someone to deliver drugs, freshly divorced, trapped in a cycle he thought was freedom.This is James Sutton. And this conversation went somewhere neither of us expected.We talk about:Growing up in Staffordshire — working class, post-industrial, no investment, no futureMoving to Liverpool and becoming John Paul McQueen on HollyoaksPlaying TV's most iconic LGBT character as a straight man — and the weight of that responsibilityThe guy who watched in secret in his bedroom, and is now married with two adopted children"I was sat on the kitchen floor with a bottle of wine. Someone was going to deliver drugs. My wife had left me."The gradual collapse — not a rock bottom, just the same bad day on repeatLeaving Hollyoaks after 22 years — why autonomy mattered more than safetyBuilding Protocol: weekly letters, keynote speaking, a course for men, and a book called How To Become Reliable AgainThe man crush segment that broke us both — Michael B Jordan, Ryan Reynolds, Declan Rice, Xabi Alonso, Paul Brunson, Henry CavillCasting a UK Friends — Alan Carr, Zach Polanski, Paloma Faith, Olivia Dean, Lauren Lo SungDating at 43: "I like redheads. I'm terrified. I don't know what I'm doing."Marvyn offers to matchmake him live on airThree tips each for men who feel stuck — gym, talking, service, self-trust, and making peace with your parents"Stop making promises to yourself that you're not going to keep"This is the best podcast I've ever done. His words. Not mine.Welcome to The Marvyn Harrison Podcast — a story-driven conversation exploring identity, fatherhood, masculinity, relationships, culture, politics, sport, and modern life.In each episode, Marvyn Harrison sits down with leading thinkers, creatives, athletes, policymakers, and cultural voices to unpack the defining moments that shaped them. Through image prompts, structured storytelling, and revealing game segments, guests explore pivotal memories, career turning points, personal struggles, and the beliefs that guide their decisions today.Expect honest discussions on mental health, family dynamics, leadership, equity, ambition, resilience, and the realities of navigating success in Britain and beyond.This is a podcast about clarity, where lived experience meets sharp cultural insight. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.