EPISODE · Jul 15, 2025 · 23 MIN
"If You Cared, You Would…”: The ADHD Relationship Lie That’s Breaking Us
from ADHD Realities · host Dr. Leann Borneman
In this no-BS solo episode, I dive headfirst into the relationship narrative that’s wrecking ADHD partnerships... the idea that "if you cared, you'd just show it." You probably do care. Your executive function is just struggling with the neurotypical expectations attached. I break down why ADHD brains struggle with “prioritizing” in the ways neurotypical society expects by explaining the real role of executive function barriers, environmental cues, and those WTF moments. This episode is packed with: Real talk about working memory, task initiation, and time blindness ADHD-friendly ways to actually show up for your partner (without shame) Why forgetting isn’t failing—and planning your love is still love A solid reminder that intention does not equal execution, but both deserve compassion Whether you’re the ADHD partner feeling like you're constantly falling short, or the one wondering why your person never “just remembers,” this episode is a must-listen. Because your love is real. You just need a roadmap—and maybe a few post-it notes. 👉 Share this with your partner (or therapist). Let’s rewrite what prioritizing love actually looks like for ADHD brains. Follow me on IG: @bornemanpscyhotherapy Interested in working with me? Check out my Website
What this episode covers
In this no-BS solo episode, I dive headfirst into the relationship narrative that’s wrecking ADHD partnerships... the idea that ”if you cared, you’d just show it.” You probably do care. Your executive function is just struggling with the neurotypical expectations attached. I break down why ADHD brains struggle with “prioritizing” in the ways neurotypical society expects by explaining the real role of executive function barriers, environmental cues, and those WTF moments. This episode is packed with: Real talk about working memory, task initiation, and time blindness ADHD-friendly ways to actually show up for your partner (without shame) Why forgetting isn’t failing—and planning your love is still love A solid reminder that intention does not equal execution, but both deserve compassion Whether you’re the ADHD partner feeling like you’re constantly falling short, or the one wondering why your person never “just remembers,” this episode is a must-listen. Because your love is real. You just need a roadmap—and maybe a few post-it notes. 👉 Share this with your partner (or therapist). Let’s rewrite what prioritizing love actually looks like for ADHD brains.
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"If You Cared, You Would…”: The ADHD Relationship Lie That’s Breaking Us
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