IIT EXCLUSIVE: "Gather Us In" Discovered to be a Traditional Latin Hymn

The DiscoveryHistorians and archeologists focused on the early Church have made a shocking discovery, announced today. Deep in the catacombs of Rome, an ancient, mysterious circular disk was discovered that turned out to be—get this!—an ancient Roman record recording of a Church song that all of us thought was composed recently after Vatican II by “Marty Haugen.”It turns out, the historian (and IIT correspondent AND former or maybe current FBI agent) Andrew Parker tells us, who just so happens to be employed by Catholic Inc., GIA Publications, and OCP Press, that the song “Gather Us In” actually was an early 3rd century composition by St. Hippolytus and isn’t a cringe leftover from the revolutionary 70s but is actually highly traditional.Entitled “Congrega Nos” in its original Latin, IIT managed to obtain an exclusive computer-repaired version of the ancient Roman record of the song in its original Latin, which appears to conveniently confirm every Vatican II era belief about “resourcement” and how the early Church celebrated the liturgy.“Vatican II did everything right. It just hasn’t been implemented fully yet. We need more guitar Masses, more music like this, and, obviously, more bubbles, banners, and balloons (and clowns),” commented Cardinal Arnold Robelche of the Vatican dicastery for the liturgy. “This discovery proves that everything we, with help from our friends at GIA publications, have been trying to do to the liturgy for 60 years just needs to be tried even harder.”Apparently, if the apparent baby voice of the singer on the track is any hint, they had babies as cantors back in the 3rd century Church, which is making many people on the cutting edge of synodality propose that maybe we need to introduce that into the modern liturgy.ControversyTraditionalists are questioning the authenticity of the recording, including questioning the idea that ancient Rome had record players, but Fr. Martin James S.J. told IIT that “those backward trads just aren’t living in the spirit. If we look hard enough, we’ll find that the early Church sang all the great hymns from ‘All Are Welcome’ to even the Dan Schutte ‘Gloria.’”Cardinal Tagle, for one, can’t wait to add the new song to his repertoire, and further boost his credentials as a trad-icon:The USCCB is already planning to mandate that the Latin version of the song be sung at every Mass (including every Latin Mass under their jurisdiction) this coming Sunday.Thanks for reading Irkutsk Ice Truckers! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.“See, I love tradition,” said Bishop Melvin of Charlotte, NC. “Trads should love me.”LyricsHere is our transcription of the song “Congrega Nos”, which it appears merely to have been rediscovered and translated by Marty Haugen in the 1970s.Lumen profluit Hic in hoc loco, Nunc tenebrae evanescereIn hac cella timores nostrasDuctum hic tibi in luce dieCongrega nos, illi perditiCongrega nos, caeci illiAdvoca nos nunc, exsurgemusExcitemus in illo sonoSumus iuvenes, mysteriaSumus veti, desideratiCantati sumus per saeculaVocati lumen populisCongrega nos, dives et superbi —Congrega nos, elati et fortesDa nos cor illa humilis estDa nos virtutem intrare cantemHic accipemus vinum aquamqueHic accipemus panem novam…Hic vocabis filii et filiaeVoca nos saltem esse ad terramPermitta nos bibere vinumPermitta nos edere panem tuiNutri nos bene et doce nosUt faciamus vitas sanctasNon in tenebrosis basiumNon in caelo longinquē adestSed hic in hoc lumen profluitNunc regnum est, nunc dies est illaCongrega nos, et tene aeternumCongrega nos, et faci tui Congrega nos, omnia unaIgnis amoris in caro ossaqueIgnis amoris in caro ossaquePLEASE PARDON THE BAD LATIN GRAMMAR. It’s hard to make Latin’s greater number of syllables fit metrically into the same recording.AND SOMEHOW WE MADE THE THEOLOGY EVEN WORSE!Here’s Haugen’s original if you haven’t yet avoided experiencing the cringe in English:And if you want another (non-baby) voice recording of the track, here’s an alternative version with the original (my) voice:Which song should we translate (err, try to discover) next? This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit irkutskice.substack.com