In Our House: The Truth About Abuse We Were Told Not to Talk About!

Episode 15: In Our Homes — The Culture We Protect vs The Culture We HealA lot of harm doesn’t start loud. It starts normal. The silence. The “respect” that really means obedience. The control that gets labeled tradition. The emotional suppression that turns into aggression. The loyalty that protects the family image instead of protecting people.In this episode of Walk With Me!, David Torres checks in, talks briefly about a disturbing current trend he calls the “online Rape Academy” (spaces where men normalize tactics of manipulation and coercion), and then brings the focus back to where these mindsets are born: our homes, our culture, our everyday norms. Because abuse doesn’t survive in a vacuum. It grows in environments where certain behaviors get excused, minimized, and passed down like “that’s just how it is.”This episode centers on the Latino community (Puerto Rico) through David’s lived experience, but the message is bigger than one culture: when something is normal to you, you don’t question it you adapt to it, learn it, and sometimes carry it forward without realizing it. There’s beauty in culture: family, pride, resilience, music, food, connection. But loving something doesn’t mean accepting it at face value. If love doesn’t want growth, it becomes enabling. And enabling is the opposite of love.We unpack what these patterns often look like in real life: “what happens in this house stays in this house,” silence culture, respect confused with control, emotional suppression, normalized aggression, and loyalty placed above safety. Then we shift into what change actually looks like: naming things honestly, private honesty before public truth, setting small boundaries, learning to pause and ask “what am I actually feeling,” lowering your tone instead of matching energy, and redefining loyalty as honesty + accountability + boundaries, not tolerating harm. And yes, it’s hard. Questioning your upbringing can bring guilt and feel like betrayal. But acknowledging harm isn’t betrayal. It’s growth. And when you break cycles, you don’t just change yourself, you change what gets passed down.Weekly Challenge: think of one belief you were taught growing up and ask: does this create connection or control? Just observe it honestly. Half-truths and rug-sweeping don’t change anything. Integrity is what you do when no one is watching.Fashion tie-in: Latino culture expresses pride through style heritage, identity, presence. And identity can evolve. David highlights how artists like Bad Bunny and J Balvin challenge rigid masculinity norms through self-expression and openness, showing that evolving culture isn’t rejecting it, it’s refining it.Follow MeYouTube: @WalkWithMe-PodcastInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/walkwithme.podcast/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@walkwithmepodWebsite: https://www.walkwithmepod.comSupportNational DV Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE — https://www.thehotline.orgRAINN: 800-656-HOPE — https://www.rainn.org988 Lifeline: call/text 988 — https://988lifeline.orgUntil then — take care of yourself.And I’ll see you on the path.