Interview with Craig Bulmer on authenticity, understanding people and where the platypus was discovered (#3)

1:24 - where the platypus was discovered.  4:22 - if you want to connect you have to think of the other person.  5:56 - being present to connect with people.  9:08 - being vulnerable is about being real without the facade.  11:18 - it takes courage to go first.  12:28 - why we're scared to show our true selves.  14:33 - why take the risk to be vulnerable?  15:51 - performing for approval makes you less likeable.  17:01 - finding the balance between technique and authenticity.  18:44 - why people are important.  19:15 - silo mentality.  19:49 - the right people in the right role.  21:01 - What is DiSC?  25:15 - building rapport.  27:24 - using DiSC and technology to understand people and build relationship.  29:26 - it's important to be aware of each other's style, especially under stress.  29:59 - under stress people resort to comfortable behaviours because of fear.  31:09 - rapport building techniques can be manipulative.  32:51 - it's not about technique, it's about trust.  33:02 - humour is a good technique to build rapport.  34:04 - how to build trust. Is trust given or earned?  36:33 - don't fight resistance, adapt to it.  37:14 - meeting people where they are at.  38:58 - intellectual vs emotional empathy.  40:28 - how stress changes behaviour and impacts empathy.  42:24 - making decisions based on what we want, not what they need.  43:19 - tension between our desires and others' needs.  45:15 - incredibly proud of achievements, but it nearly cost the relationship.  46:00 - re-investing in strained relationships.  48:20 - what we're praised for is often not what's important.  51:21 - selfishness does not make you happy.  52:01 - productive conflict.  52:42 - separating ego from conflicts.  55:02 - what makes us happy.  55:55 - be aware of your own triggers.  56:57 - emotional intelligence is counter-intuitive.  57:58 - excuses for bad behaviour.  59:54 - personal responsibility.  62:58 - expecting people to do things they are not capable of.  64:18 - being a good performer does not make them a good leader - but we promote them anyway.  65:25 - rewarding people for being the best at what they do.  67:37 - you need to understand your people and what drives them.  68:11 - understanding people helps you to better utilise their strengths.  71:46 - last words.More detailed show notes can be found at https://candourpodcast.com/craig-bulmer