Is Mourning Out Loud Over Our Losses Good for Us?

Everyone experiences loss in their lives in one way or another. How we attempt to cope with those losses depends upon several things. First, the kind of loss we are facing can dictate whether our response to it is mild, strong or severe. Second, our cultural environment offers up expectations as to how our mild strong or severe responses are to be displayed. In biblical days, grieving over difficult losses was often displayed in a very outward, very public manner. The Bible is full of examples of such public crying, wailing, renting of clothes and despair. For many of us in our present-day mindset, these things may seem to be over-the-top and too dramatic. Actually, when we seek to understand all of this lamenting, we find very strong lessons of faith, growth and acceptance. Help! Loss is difficult. Sometimes it is unbearable. When we seek help in coping with such things, the counsel is always the same: Go through the experience and don’t try to avoid or hide the emotions. We need to give ourselves permission to feel what we are feeling so we can, when appropriate, move forward to the next step. In the Old Testament book of Ecclesiastes, we are told there is a suitable time for mourning, just as there is a suitable time to dance for joy. The Hebrew word for mourn actually means “to tear the hair, to beat the breasts, to lament or wail.” Wow! For us living now with our current cultural backgrounds, that certainly sounds dramatic. Biblical lamenting To be clear, we are not suggesting that our lamenting be so dramatic. What we are suggesting is that we be willing to face our tragedies with an openness to feel them. Why? As we look into the deep lamenting revealed in the Bible, several things begin to rise to the surface. Most striking is that our lamenting not only serves a purpose, but it is also part of a distinct process. There are four essential steps our outward anguish can bring us through. The first step is for us to come face-to-face with the reality of our tragedy. Without this acceptance of the pain of our experience, we would not be able to fully move forward through the healing and growth process of the other steps. Check out our March 25, 2024 podcast, “Is Mourning Out Loud Over Our Losses Good for Us?” for more. As we lay out the scriptural steps our anguish can lead us through, we also uncover several other reasons besides personal loss that can provoke such outward lamenting. These issues can be a result of our own bad choices, as well as tragedies that don’t happen to us but nevertheless have a dramatic effect on us. Join us as we uncover the strength and growth that can come from our mourning. Though this topic is rarely talked about, it is absolutely a worthwhile investment of our time and attention.