Isn't it a question of when, not “if” the family will eventually struggle? | Family Issues Ep. 147 episode artwork

EPISODE · Jun 28, 2021 · 6 MIN

Isn't it a question of when, not “if” the family will eventually struggle? | Family Issues Ep. 147

from The Daily Disturbance · host Anthony Pangilinan

Don't avoid it, anticipate it. Your family will struggle, if not yet. Does this disillusion you? This is actually good. An illusion isn’t real, is it? So, technically, to be disillusioned is to be freed from illusions, and isn’t that Good?! Accept it. Believe you can go through it. Create the steps to make it happen. The ABCs of the overcomer.

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Isn't it the question of when, not if, the family will eventually struggle with you? This is the daily disservice podcast with Anthony Fungini. Here I am in a city north of Manila Baguio, they call it a recording this podcast outside of the studio, not using the same mic and system that I have for the past months with Hana. Nevertheless I felt that I should continue on a bit rough, a bit spontaneous, not as organized, but let me assure you just as authentic and real, perhaps even more, when I do it more naturally.

We're looking at family issues and now the question, is it the question of when, not if, the family will eventually struggle with, or because of you? A Portuguese proverb goes this way, a busy mother makes smothful daughters, that was a revealing quote that I'd like to actually share with what he said, my business will actually impact my son in a negative way, my wife's business at home may be an indication that she's not delegating and empowering our children enough and eventually the struggle will show. Here's a question of when, not if, the family will eventually struggle, precisely. When I say that I had hoped that we'd get a bit of leeway as we started our marriage, what they said, you know, would be a period of seven beautiful years before the possible itch or the honeymoon period, well, I think I shared this before we had none.

It came all too soon. It wasn't if, but when the struggle would happen. Benjamin was barely for when he found out that he had a condition that required immediate heart surgery and bypass, and not in the Philippines, it was recommended that it be done by some experts abroad. Not if, but when a dear friend of ours, who actually counseled, Maricel and I, before we got married, was going home and as she walks into her living room, she finds her husband in conversation with another woman.

I mean, one, one admittance led to another and she actually found out that her husband, a co-counselor to marriage, just including ours, actually already had a five-year-old kid with somebody else. What's the question for her of if but when I recall this word disillusionment, which initially sounds negative, but when you really think about it, it's another way of saying that reality bites, an illusion isn't real, right? You've got magicians who are illusionists. So if an illusion isn't real, a dis-illusion is the unveiling of what is unreal.

So in a sense, dis-illusionment is a good thing, and for all of us, it's not a question of if, but when certain realities will prove otherwise in our lives and in our families. I think seeing things, whether it is good, bad or ugly, is a blessing, and that is after your song by a Christian singer called Blessing that I have learned to appreciate, just a couple of words from that song. Because when your blessings come through ring drops, what if your healing comes through tears? What if a thousand simplest nights and what it takes to know you're near, what is trials of this life?

Are your mercies in disguise? Let me quote Rick Raulian, families are messy, immortal families are eternally messy. Sometimes the best we can do is to remind each other that we are related for better or for worse and try to keep the maiming and killing through a minimum.

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