Jackie Tohn

Welcome. Welcome. Welcome to the first episode of 2021. Brand new year.

Happy new year. Happy new year, you Monica. Of course you're listening to our entire episode. And I'm still Dan Rather and you're still Maximus.

That's right. So far, so the same. So far, so the same. We have a friend on today, an old friend.

Her name is Jackie Tone. You heard her on our very first Christmas special because she's incredible singer and songwriter. But you also probably know her as Melrose on Glow, which is on Netflix. And she's a new show called The Best for Leftovers Ever, which is out right now on Netflix.

So I hope everyone checks that out. Can you hear the toilet running in the background of this intro? Possibly. Well, that's fun.

We'll try to keep that as a tradition in 2021. Oh, that's lovely. The year that running toy. Okay, please enjoy Jackie Tone.

He's an object. We have a set in this orientation in a lot of months. I know. I'm so thrilled.

We're just staring at the stupid desk now. We've come across them to. I miss the desk. And you guys haven't known for my reps.

I'm looking at my eyes. Right? No, I can't talk. I'm talking.

I'm going to be on the computer screen. Anyway, that's running your face. We'll be running FaceTime real time. I'm new.

So here we are. We're lovely opportunity. I remember the pod. I was a shower from ours.

Exactly. Which gives rise to an in-person real time interview. We're not the year with a real person interview. I remember the pod on the pod.

Oh, I missed that. A pod member on the pod. Bad news, Jackie. Your shoes weren't nearly as clean as you thought.

Look under your look at this. Oh, I got news for you. Wait. I'm eating friends in here.

That was here when I came. You had a mud under the end. Directly under my shoes. And real dark like it's wet.

Like it's wet. Also, there's two pieces of bad news. A, you had an existing thing. And here, B, there's a water leak.

That's me, that's moist. So a lot going on. And all pointing to, I definitely sold your road with my mud boots. But I don't think I did.

I swear. Goddamn it. We don't need to point out all the little issues in that. We got a lot.

No, I got a peek up. We got some dirt. So the first thing that you notice, Jackie, there seems to be a couple of your numbers. And it doesn't even seem to be a couple of your numbers.

Clearly, 100% concludes the way a couple of your numbers. How many days do you think that you're in? I'm going 11 to 14. Oh, wow.

I think it's about eight days old. It was last week. So we had bring up speed, which was I had to pull you to all mine. So as everyone remembers from last year, way long ago, way long ago, 2020, the year we will never speak up.

Different decades. Yeah, different decades. Yeah, I just did the thrill controversial sort of pain in there. I love 2020.

Yeah. It was a phenomenal 2020 for me. In addition to having two surgeries relapsing being in quarantine spending 10 months straight with my kids. But I'm not letting those things cloud the entire day.

Like a such a great year for me also. And it had a bunch of challenges. I guess I would describe mine exactly the same way. All the specifics are different.

Other than glow getting canceled or renew reversed. Because that's a term I didn't know was even a thing. Wait, what's renew reversed? We were a shot at the season.

The fuck got you here. That was one of the massive, about punches of other than 2020 being a large buyer. Had you shot half. Then Corona happened.

You got shot down production. You were going to resume. You know what? That's right.

We're not doing half of it. So we're 10 out of order. So all the costumes were fit. Our characters were everything was there.

All the scripts were written. Everyone was ready. Everyone was so much money. And I asked you a greedy monster question.

Yeah, I did. Yeah, you picked up your season. We took it two weeks break. And then we just didn't go back.

And that's just a while. And then anyone's mind was more just a matter of like, when are we going to go back? I'll push again. Oh, other shows are picking back up.

I'm making swap. That's like an interface. People on each other. Very, very, very, very.

I mean, respiratory particles. You guys know what I mean? That's what's what I mean. I don't know.

So it was just while we kept just like waiting to find out when we were going to pick up. And then we were like, we're not. I know there were some girls on the show who were a little less heartbroken than others just because so much time had passed. And what TV a while thing is, I'm in first position at glow for as long as it takes to make season four.

If it takes two years, not touch it. A lot of girls were like, it's a massive bar. We wanted to make glow more than anything. But if we were just going to keep being on hold for six month and can't do other work.

And I don't get too much into how it's also just maybe you think this is fascinating. And this does have to evolve. So traditionally, you did movies, people did movies. And you were actually obligated them for three months while they made me a three weeks built in your contract to reshoot.

So we're chasing your off the market for four months. And then the other option was you wanted to network television show. It's generally shot for nine months of the year. And you were exclusive to them.

Now you had to ask them if you could move in the summer. They would give you the right to do that. But again, you were employed for nine months of the year. Now in this new world of streaming and small shows, you're only shooting fucking seven, eight weeks a year to make your eight episodes of your ten episodes.

And then they hold you for 48 fucking, and it's not like the old days where you would go do a movie in that period because there are no movies to go do. So really what you want to be able to do is go do more limited run TV shows. This is where I think that they're sitting together. There's no fucking exclusive TV stuff anymore.

Just like there was no exclusive movie stuff. Well, you did a Disney movie this year. So you will not do a universal movie this year. But that's kind of what's happening in television in the torsion.

I am going to take that down by the play for people. Because that is exactly what it's going to be about the whole time. It's also a tricky one because being in this whole position that I'm in right now, I find a challenging to say complaints out loud ever about what I find to be the quote, unquote, unquote, unquote, injustice with this business because I'm just so f***ed that anyone is taking any time to even look in this direction for minutes. But then all that said, you get this in place and you're like, we're talking about it.

We're like, listen, when that work for four months becomes a year, it becomes a year and a half, it becomes two years. It's two dollars an hour. It's correct. I'm besides that as actors and one of the performers I want to capitalize on momentum and keep that.

What's going on going from your point of view, if I were you, that would be the single stress. I wouldn't have anything actually to do with the money I was losing. It would be like, I've been on here for 25 fucking years. Finally, people want me to be in shift.

And I can't. My manager was in two of glow, I fired mostly for this, but for a lot of things told me not to do glow season two. Because he was like, you know, if you turn it down, that's how you have the negotiating leverage. And I was like, you realize that I'm 35 and no one's hired me till now, right?

And this is down to my speaking voice. You know, I got a specific thing. You know, I'm selling just this, right? And they're buying it.

Well, this is why we're on the wild in person rising. I'm assuming you get a little bit more linear because the communication is so challenging. And if you don't run my face, it's tracking you guys. It's a major lighting perfect.

Okay, so you and I can always tell, we know each other because you and Kristin are friends. How did you guys become friends? It's crazy. So Kristin and I met in 2003, which is a minute ago.

Yeah, it's 18 years ago now. So and we met because Andy Fickman, the famed and jolly or we love so much director directed her in a 99's theater production called Snow and directed me in a 99's theater black production of a show called Geotopia. Oh, Geotopia. So Andy was directing both of our little shows and Kristin came to Geotopia.

I went to Snow and we were the only women of our girls actually. Girls of our age and I said, Andy, who's that long girl? No, I just loved her. And he's like, you know, so we're actually getting to the number.

She said the same thing about Geotopia. I think she just moved here from York and she didn't like, no, it's super time to people. And I don't know if I can say this, but the Kevin days. Oh, no, I don't know.

I'm a wonderful guy. So you have to say about him. I'm a little bit nervous about the other in that cap of Kristin. And anyone who's been a Kevin wonderful.

That's a wonderful. Nevermind. Oh, you like him. What if you started dating Kristin's auntie?

I'm sorry. I'll get into it. Well, then you would be officially Kristin's stepdaughter in some weird way. I don't know how that would work.

It's somehow. Yeah, you'd be just. I was her stepdaughter. Then pull the mixedness.

If you're marrying Kevin, he's not adopting you. That was a misfire. And if he did adopt her, would have nothing to do with Kristin. No, no, no, no.

But she is my stepmother. The P baby is her stepgrandchild. Uh-huh. With her husband.

Uh-huh. Oh, I'm really sorry. I just, because being dang. Uh-huh.

Maybe that'll be our second P baby. Oh my goodness. You're going to have to pee in there as well. No, but maybe I don't think you know.

So Monica's house is just across the street. We were there during it and I pee in the toilet. It turned out the water. We shot off.

So it just sat there. And I don't know. I had to pee on top of your pee because what else was I going to do. And then we figured out we discovered that we had made a P baby.

Who now lives in that toilet. It's our child. Oh, it's actually like a thing of it's a child. It's a baby.

Yeah, it's a beautiful baby. And I just want to say about a couple of seconds ago when I said that that was in the meeting obviously throughout because that's a normal response. I want to apologize for that. Thank you.

You'll face up both of your facial expressions. I was way off. We love this baby a lot. And we worry about her.

No other P baby. She's a princess. No brethren. No.

I'll never make a second. You and that became really good buddies. And then of course 13 years ago, 13 years ago I started dating Val. 13 years ago?

Yeah, a lot more. That's crazy. When you used a few longer, I can't tell. In the moment that you said that, I feel like I'm going to be my whole life.

But in that moment I was like, that felt longer than it had been. because I also remember sitting on the bench outside her house in the valley. And you guys have briefly broken up. And I went over there and there were dogs everywhere.

And I was just being a homie and it was not great. And then it was great. So I'm trying to get to the point where you and I share so much similarities. I think.

I'll label them for myself as mostly my character defense. But like we see each other. Yeah, that's pretty true. Well, I mean, a circle on someone's say something.

She knows that the worst part of me just wanted to fuck this guy. I fucking got one's all the attention. He thinks he's got a fucking clubber story. And I'll just look over and he's like, watching it all register.

Okay, now he's jealous. Now he's mad. But then I'm feeling similar things. like we've both gotten pretty good at biting our tongues.

And just a selfless feeling. I believe this is why you and I relate so much. It's that I like you. You just mentioned you were 35 and got on your show.

And I was nine. I was nine. I was nine for 10 fucking years. And I was in a rally.

I was watching all these people working, all these people make money. It's just slowly killing me. And I'm like, the options or feels like the options at that time are you'd acknowledge I'm worth them. Or acknowledge there's something in just.

And once you've decided it's in just I resent people. Sure. I found it and this talk about the worst parts of myself. And my character defense.

I found it difficult. And you know what? I think Kristen was always somehow an outlier. You weren't jealous of her.

Because she's my best friend and your daughter and your her upset. I'm sad that her P baby and your her husband. But like I just never was that way. But you know actually interestingly I never saw talk about it in security and stuff.

I don't know that I ever really believed that level of radio. I was like, oh cool. My movie is our mobile friend. And then it was really my friends who got the episode of Castle.

I tried out for it. It was that it was hard to be because that was within my reach that I went in on. And 99.78 times I'm 100. It wasn't me.

And then I also think you and I share that like you're either into this or you're not. Well, I was be for me. I was very good if you plugged me into this. I can do a couple things pretty uniquely.

I think that's what I'm writing on. And so the smaller end of the game, the beginning steps of the game are really flexibility and being able to get plugged into things. I was not good at that. And you know what else was wild and you're both going to cackle me.

Didn't know I was specific. But I also think this is all compounded by the fact that you were out here when you were nine and you had deals. You had stuff. I was in your work with me.

Oh, well actually I can fact check you later. I blew it. What was the first time I was there was two fact checks that we had our fact check. And then you and I had a bad one.

And then we factored. And then we were in the mirror in the mirror in the mirror. And it started acting when I was nine. And I did random things.

But I could get the only real job I got. I was on the nanny a couple times and played two different characters. Oh, my god, oh, my god. Oh, my god.

Oh, my god. Oh, bores. I can't imagine any one in the world being better at playing young friend Russia than you. Oh, my god.

My character once was Francine. And then I think the other time Tiff and I was friends cousin. Oh, it's Tiffany. My second cousin twice on my own.

Oh, my god. I told you my friend, Russia. No, give it to me right now. I'm gonna be thinking how do we overlap.

So I went to some party that I should have gotten into. It was like I'm after party for some movie or some shit. I'm going to go on and say, she really dug me. And she said, she smells.

I was in it. And she gave me her number, and she got mine. And she said, I want to call you in for stuff. And I was like, oh, this is reverse happening.

Like we're a kind of a man. I'm going to eat some of these. But I went in audition for her show based on that. Having dancing.

And I never got called that. Did you audition for large brand pressure? Yeah. Miss Michelle.

Miss Champ. Yeah. That was not like Jeremy Lewis. Does he really have to?

The crazy thing about brandmaking is, she just has some she can't reach. If you blow up your nose while doing Fran, you can't do it. Because the sound is coming out of your nasal. Oh my god.

There was so much pressure going into the audition. Like she's kind of like, I got to stop. I got to stop tonight. I get this and I didn't get it.

Well, I think a lot of the time too. When I speak for myself and other overlap, when I had nothing going on, it was almost impossible to get a job. Because every opportunity meant so much to me. They could feed that little seed of meat in your eye.

You walk in the door. And they're just like, oh, she wants this way too bad. You're like, hey, you're doing a bit. I'm going to stop the mirror, man.

It's about to go over something. You're not doing jokes. Okay, so thank you, Fran, for being interested. He was so interested in her.

He was my hero. I loved her. She was my hero. And then obviously I was legitimately a mini Fran.

And then I got on that show. And I was like, this is a cool shit. But to your question, Monica, I started when I was a kid and I got whatever little things I could, which were very, very few in far between. And for a large part of my childhood elementary middle and high school, my mom was taking a New York City to go on auditions.

And when I graduated from high school, I went to the University of Delaware for a single semester. And I was planning on going back. Because at that point, you had to be a mind. I had been acting a decade.

And I was like, hey, Fran, maybe I'll go to college, be looking normal kid for a little bit. I went. And then Delaware has this big week, he's been keeping me in. So they stopped at the same 15th and go back to February 15th.

So kids could get all these extra credits. On that break, I went with my mom and my agent, Maggie Golda, fresh faces, they have all the long islands. Maggie Golda, fresh faces, they're from all the long islands. Oh, fresh faces, they just.

And this, the fucking agent of agents is one of them. She was just called Colle and Drilide Webber. She was never here for me again if you don't like this girl. I feel only in fresh faces.

I feel a del from what's funny is she's only started her career. She's only writing redheads. She gave herself a niece. Anyone that he had had.

So she was like this tiny agent out of her back house in Long Island. She was a killer. So then I moved out here when I was 18. And I think it was a fairly big error when I moved to LA.

Never told her this, here we go. People were like, you have a little tiny agent who works out of a house in Long Island. Get one of these big LA agents. And I did.

And I was better off with a woman who looked up who created Roseanne and was like those are Jackie's sensibilities. And called them until they answered the phone and would meet me. And I was like, oh my god, I'm just like, get that. Until they met me.

I would bring a boobot and sing to karaoke tracks in like the lobby of a hotel. She'd be like, I got this big producer coming to meet you. And then even though I would go sing to rent to karaoke tracks in the lobby of a hotel to the double tree, which we lied instead of saying it. I was a household by the airport.

I'm the adventurer of a hotel. With the adventurer of a hospital. And when she called people and they asked her we were saying she would say, log into her. Oh my god, I want to read a biography about her.

Is she with us? She's incredible. I'm starting to write something about this wild ass story. And she's a big player.

Oh my god, I would have come here. And I have lost all of us even. I'm concerned everyone thinks I'm a piece of shit. And nobody, oh my god, I have this embarrassing agent.

I've got to be with one of these ones. It says, I'm great. I wouldn't have met a manager at one point when I first got here. And I wasn't even embarrassed by her.

I just sort of was like, small potatoes. Let me get something bigger. And now, but this day, if I ever get another manager, the number one thing I will want is that they be somebody. I'll do this.

I'd be either client. They're just like figuring out the puzzle pieces of what is the next step for this person as opposed to just like a giant company where even where I'm at now, you just get kind of lost. You know, I had a period of like four years or something where I had three movies, fail, and I was really scared. And I thought I was never going to work again.

And I was so on my agent. And I was so resentful of my agents. And about, I don't know, three years ago, I called my old agent. I said, hey, I just want to apologize to you.

I was really scared. And I didn't think I was ever going to work again. And I was assuming you guys had way more power than you do. And I was putting it all on you.

And I'm sorry. And I recognized that you can't make me work. You can't. It doesn't work that way.

But in my frustration and fear, I started thinking I bet they send in Will or Net to that thing. I bet they're sending so on. Because again, it's either like, if you look at the options on the table, or I suck, or there's some thing of foot. There's a thing that's happening somewhere.

So I didn't even admit it to me. And then if it's me, I got a quick. I got to retire because if it's me, then we got to go. What do you think is the really, really scary truth of deciding to be in this business?

It's none of those sorts of things. It's like, I don't know that anyone was really doing anything wrong. Right. I remember you asking me.

And I think about it all the time because I don't know how it didn't occur to me. But when we did the Christmas special many years ago, you know, I often wondered when we were friends for all those years. And it wasn't happening for you. Like, why you were still doing it?

And there's something that we also relate on. There's a little part of you that's like, little sick that you will get back up every single year. You're told no, not $99, $99, $10, $10, $10, $10. I'm just for 20, 20 years.

And then you get up the next day. And you're like, maybe this one will be it? It's delusional. Yeah, that journey is not for everyone.

Oh, no, no, no. Well, healthy people. Right. And I think my interest in that question specifically for you isn't so much like, not why you keep doing something you're crazy dancing, I was having a very vocal about that.

But the toll it took on me, I mean, I would've been an act no matter what. I was only, I needed so much relief from that experience. I needed to go check out a lot. It was just so hard.

Just feeling like a failure for a decade. What sucks too is like, I want to tell actors coming up. Don't do it. Don't feel that way.

You're not a failure. But when I was not working, it's like, well, objectively, yeah, you are. Everyone around you is killing it. And you're not.

And you're standing there doing the same things a lot of time. You're working way harder, writing way more, doing more stand up, showing up for you like trying any possible way you can. That's just not you sometimes. Oh, yeah.

You sang and performed. You did college tours. You got in the stand up. You took stand up workshop.

It was a lot of people around. That is the difference between someone that's experiencing what you did. And I did. That doesn't get over the hurdle.

It's because that is part of it. I couldn't bring more. What ended up happening when I did start really doing all the things you said. Because in my twenties, I didn't really.

I told him jokes occasionally. I wasn't like a club comic where I was like touring and trying to really do stand up musical comedy and get out. In my twenties, I wasn't writing. I wasn't really making my own stuff.

I wasn't. And so then in my early thirties is when I really was like, I need to be doing more stand up. And it was that. All these other avenues that made me talk about the whole Steam.

Feels much better about myself. Because I was getting validation. What you reminded why you wanted to do this. Because you forget.

It's all about the result of getting hired at some point. And all you're thinking about. And you literally forget like, oh, I like entertaining people. So good.

It made these auditions. Not the only thing in my life. But I would have to think I just want to praise person. And I got to a point of auditions where I've been acting like I said.

Since I was a kid in my thirties, my hands started shaking on auditions. And I started getting real because I guess I reached critical mass of not being able to take it. And my nervous system was like, yo, we're out. And then I was like, I would have to keep like press my feet into the ground.

And I don't even have to be 20 years of it. So you would understand. When you get to propane on all of that. And now, baby, you are now.

Because of okay, baby. Yes. And I imagine that would have been super helpful. Because it's only about beta blockers.

And that helped massively combo that with doing stand up and getting out there starting to tour. And then starting to earn some money. When I went on auditions and I met producers, you weren't my god anymore. Because like, okay, it is what it is.

I'm sure the improv tonight. I'm opening for Garland next week. I'm feeling a little bit like shit doesn't stay again. I'm on the comedy on your shows and feeling that's like, but you bring that energy into a room.

You're like, oh, that's a mind fog. It's kind of the opposite of secret. It's like, for what I understand about the secret. It's like, you believe in that.

It's almost the opposite. You can ensure you don't want anything. It's just pouring. No, no, no, no, no.

You can't convince yourself. That's the difference. You really have to be there. Which is why the stand up and the things.

You weren't just trying to tell yourself, I don't care. You really didn't. Because you really had something to do about that. I can't fake it.

Like if you go into these meetings. And I would like sit there. I mean, people said, I would sit outside the thing. And I would try.

I would try and sit there to come on my mind to make my fucking hands and feet sound. And I would sit out there. And all my friends are successful and everybody is killing it. And for a ten-liner for Castle and just sitting out there pressing my hands into my left is trying to stop shaking.

And you're with wilds. I didn't feel nervous. I wasn't like all those people in there. They could, I just, your body keeps the body, kept the score.

Stay tuned for more harm. If you dare. Okay. So essentialism, if you read that, okay.

So what you're just talking about the agent in the book, he says that having boundaries actually makes people drawn to you. When it tells them is this person values themselves, they know their value and having like boundaries. I'm not gonna work on the weekends. I'm gonna do this in that.

It's like all counterintuitive. I want to work around because I want to work with this person. That's been a massive issue in my whole life from my parents to my relationships to my reps to everyone. I'm a boundaryless person because I want to be liked and I want to be cool.

And I think that's, I mean, I'm sort of realizing that now obviously I didn't ever have a real light on that until more recently. But I really, I've never been a boundary person because I was like, I'm like, I'm like, I'll do whatever. And I'm cool. Well, your sex stories are always the most amusing of all of Chris and Seren.

Thank you so much. But those boundaries were more obviously, no, you're joking. But those were my choice. I wasn't like me letting dudes do anything.

More emotionally when I see a moment where like I should put my down and you need to get the fuck out because it's okay. And you'd respect me if I did that. I'll just like revert to childhood and sit quietly and not say anything and then be grumpy or be sad or be passive aggressive. So basically fulfill everything that's going on in your life and nurture all these wounds that exist.

And turn my 20s where two things, one, I wasn't doing other stuff. I was just saying, okay, I got reps. I hope I get jobs, wish me luck fingers crossed. And the other thing was I was so wrapped up in my relationships in my 20s that I focused so hard on the dudes that I would take one for two years, two years, two years, three years.

And I was serial man, I would miss and I would always have a boyfriend that I would watch them. So I rock it too. Yeah. And I would still rock it over and over and over again.

No, no, no, no. Yeah, my pussy is. So I'm a... You're a teacher manager.

This is Jackie Town Colling from Post E-Magedon. This is Post E Town Colling from Post E-Magedon. Right? Yeah, right now, me too.

Does that manager only like Redheads? No, no, no, no, no, no. My matchable pussy movie, my running partner Rachel and I just finished it and we're going to pitch. Yeah, we're going out.

Wait, we've learned into reality for another. We had like a fun joke about your pussy, the manager. And now I'm learning for the first time. You actually have a project.

I've said that my pussy is a talent scout for... Oh, I know this is my reference. I'm definitely never said this to you. That sort of thing.

I've moved the idea of the other way, I've always had my head and just gone like, you know, there's a story in here. Completely for my 20s, every two ideas skyrocketed to fame. I mean, just crazy. I mean, there's Grammy winners, showrunners, directors.

And when we dated, we were arguing about this story. What's about the envelope? Was it that you were seeking out people who didn't get proximity to that? Oh, I had nothing going on.

I hit you with my theory on this years ago. I don't know if you remember it. I'm sure I do. What's your...

You said I can't date someone who's not really funny. Yes. And I said, are you sure it's not that you can't date someone who's approval of you mean something? Meaning this person's a community.

So if I can make them laugh, that approval will feel better. I think Joe Tasty-Cab driver laughed, big fucking deal. So it's not unrelated because she was attracted to people who were hyper talented because their approval felt really good. And of course, I've heard talented people do end up working.

Yeah. So it's not unrelated. No, it's not unrelated. You know, as we talked about a million times, there's a ton of hyper talent that nothing ever happens to them.

A. And B. With these particular set of dudes, disabled gents, Kara. I mean, one was broke within the next one.

They've gone a couch in his friend's studio on Franklin and then became like a multimole. Multimole, I'm not familiar. Yeah. Pop, start, like crazy.

Yeah, it's just wild. Jason Moran. Jason Moran is just like, it's just wild. Like, it's just like, it's just like, it's just like, it's just like, I started to like sort of write the seeds of the movie.

And then because of the pandemic, right? I'm running. I'm fishing. I love this.

Are you still in touch with any of these people? No, you're a person who does that. The most others now. None of the others.

I mean, I mean, I love it. I haven't spoken to him in, oh, God, I have no idea. Years, you're probably five years. Maybe we exchanged a text three years ago, but it's been, you know, we don't talk.

You're so supportive of him that I assumed you guys talked. Because I've recently discovered what a change is. He's a gentleman. I went again on Instagram, I think it's a completely funny.

And I keep telling you about it. You know, I'm still like, you're in Instagram. He's not went into a crazy town, and now I think it's easier for me, too. Because we are all doing wellish.

That it's not like me, on the sidelines, like it used to be. Like if I could get more still any of the things that you have going on. You know, sort of. And Ricky knows this.

But like, I remember him when you was on last night. Rick Lassman. You are a wonderful man. I thought it was for a brief reason.

I'm just going to get promoted to the head of Marvel TV show. Behind the scenes, videography on Iron Man. Rad is another president of Marvel. He's not a real fucking television.

So I'm so happy about that. She got in on the ground floor. I mean, I was a fucking loser drug addict. And then Rad was doing videography, and she picked some.

like come home from a date of all and have a totally reasonable right about job. I would want to make a Jackie Shade hole in the wall and fucking escape through concrete anyway I could. Yes. By the way, sitting down on my own, I would come home and their job from my leotard.

I was like, literally the zipper was digging in my back. I was wrestling and turning and I was like, hurts. I can't. I can't sit back.

Just whatever the natural gripe was. But if you're talking to your partner who doesn't have a job, you can't get a job. And like, you would come home and be like, oh, I don't know about this dialogue or whatever. I couldn't sympathize.

I couldn't be a partner to him. Yeah. Like I couldn't sit there and I was back because I was like, I was fucking killed. I would kill for what you're playing about.

Yeah. Yeah. And again, just to make sure I'm not putting it about like, he's more in. No, he wasn't a premonel.

No, he was like, did you know how regular work stuff? I mean, when people wonder why Brene broke up, it was because of having an old relationship. And I'm like, no, that really wasn't it. There were many things.

But one of the bigger ones was I was an ice cream. I was like, I was like, no, we bought thermostatic valves at whatever the high end home people you see. I was like, I was like, I was like, I don't know. The thermostatic valves are the fucking valves that are behind them.

Not being turned into shower. And I had bought $6,500 with them to remodel at the house. And I was very upset to spend $6,500 and then you don't even see. And I was complaining about it for the 25 minutes.

And she went in the car and she finally goes, you fucking are going to make a million dollars issue. You fucking shut up about the 6500. Now I'm like, you have from her point of view, fucking get over it. Yeah, why do I have a shoulder or yours?

Yes, I'm from making a grand to make a million dollars and she's still making whatever. And yeah, it must have been maddening. We're both right. Yeah.

I'm just saying it's that we're starting to like we're just counting your experience, which also is totally valid. Yeah, I don't want to say I feel safe. And I still don't spend it. We talk about this because I don't have that issue.

And I tried to get it. I know I'll talk to him. I'll be like, can I just like, well, I want to start on these really gorgeous shoes. And I was like, and where's the booty?

Like they were excessive. And I was like, what are we doing with those booties? And she was like, there's not a party. And I wanted them.

And I bought for myself. And I was like, teach me the fun way. So someone knows both of you. I just, I don't know.

I do think someone in the middle of you too is probably because we have that mongano. I'm so sorry. Well, how much was the person that I'm like, I know why am I ever ever in a position where I'm like, oh, fuck, I have no money. I spent the money on that land.

But I shouldn't have no money. Why do we relist it about my life and about what things cost for me and how much I have to buy lamps and shoes. I think doing the big thing is your parents' hustlers. My mom's hustler money was money was money.

So money was on our minds all 18 years. And Monica's parents were more comfortable in a computer programmer. I think I grew up around a lot more fear of financial insecurity. My parents are immigrants.

Who did not go a day without telling me you make sure that you picked something safe and that you have that money. It was not not an issue. My mom is immigrant as well. And the child of Holocaust survivors.

And so our house growing up, you can throw out a chicken. We're not going to have anything. Don't throw that out using the bones. We're using the fucking bones for my mom.

She was not keeping the marriage. I'm making not making stuff. I'm making stuff. I'm not a chef.