Jason Tougaw on Finding Your Own Mental Stability When Your Family Didn’t Provide it

Content Warning: This episode mentions domestic abuse, substance abuse and suicide.  Acclaimed writer and university professor Jason Tougaw has a very serene life now as an adult. He’s married, living in New York, and although he says he works too much, he finds time to reflect on a childhood that was much more chaotic. Jason’s family passed around a belief that something was wrong with their blood, which they cited to explain generations of eccentric and destructive behavior as well as chronic instability. As a kid, Jason lived in a school bus, lived with an abusive stepfather, lived with his grandmother for stretches of time, and tried to make sense of his homosexuality in an era where being gay definitely did not feel okay. But Jason paid attention to habits and ways of living that he didn’t wish to replicate, paths that could lead him to a better life, and to the healing power of New Wave music. It’s a fascinating conversation for anyone who has ever felt that their family of origin was their destiny and anyone who wanted to break patterns.