John Betjeman. How To Get On In Society.

Phone for the fish knives, NormanAs cook is a little unnerved;You kiddies have crumpled the serviettesAnd I must have things daintily served.Are the requisites all in the toilet?The frills round the cutlets can waitTill the girl has replenished the cruetsAnd switched on the logs in the grate.It's ever so close in the lounge dear,But the vestibule's comfy for teaAnd Howard is riding on horsebackSo do come and take some with meNow here is a fork for your pastriesAnd do use the couch for your feet;I know that I wanted to ask you-Is trifle sufficient for sweet?Milk and then just as it comes dear?I'm afraid the preserve's full of stones;Beg pardon, I'm soiling the doileysWith afternoon tea-cakes and scones.