Jokes and Boundaries: How to Respond to Hurtful 'It’s Just a Joke’ Comments

After doing something offensive or unkind, people often follow it up with, “It’s just a joke.” They use this as a way to undermine your legitimate feelings and to also make light of how ‘sensitive’ you are. Don’t be fooled by the undertones of aggression! Your feelings are valid!    There are different forms of humor, mockery being one of them. Mockery though is often hurtful and usually there’s a person who ends up being the butt of the joke. However, teasing someone is often much more playful and it’s a harmless banter that happens between friends. Usually teasing comes from a place of comradery or when your friend circle is poking at a shared experience.    How are these two different from sarcasm? Sarcasm can be seen as a more sharper sense of wit being played. You can be more ironic or mocking a situation with a twist of wit to it. However, when being sarcastic, it usually isn’t at the expense of someone you care about. It’s used to lighten the mood and call out the obvious.    It’s different to navigate between the lines of being humorous vs. being hurtful. It is all context based. When it’s teasing and sarcasm, all parties are usually onboard and are here for a good time. When it’s mockery, you know you’re getting the short end of the stick. Someone is trying to sick your boat so that others may raise and look down on you.    Continue Your Growth Journey: Kaminiwood.com