JW Ep 188 - Jessimae Peluso

You can just lay it down. Oh my god. I'm so sorry. I can't believe you just did it.

You should have been parental advisory. It should be a pop rental advisory for this episode of People Should Smoke Pop for the last. They should. Oh my gosh.

I know this is a podcast. Can you hear the movements? How the fuck? No.

How the fuck? I love my word. Oh my god. Hello.

Is this how the podcast goes? Are we just start? Yeah, we just go. Are we starting?

We are starting right now. Here. What? I hear.

What news here. And how do you hear what you hear? Oh, we're gonna have some fun. I don't know if this is a good idea.

What? I thought it was like so much... If I had a dollar for every time I heard that. Why do I sound like Justin Martindale after a weekend in West Hollywood?

Hey... You know what's so fucked up? Is I can't get off this microphone now. I went to Disneyland yesterday On a full a fast pass and a and a even faster edible actually take it back switch that reverse it a Shroom Is there any other way to go?

Hello Mickey Mouse is multiplied and goofy you know what I have a theory about goofy. He's a fuck boy Goofy's a fuck boy how so you should see the way he dresses and acts like a fuck boy You know she dresses like a hipster exactly. He's a fuck boy from Venice, California And he's like oh I'm goofy. I got a fucking fedora on and it taught me about home a shirt You want to hang out and have some house margaritas I heard From a tour guide yesterday that mini is an independent woman Does I want to marry Mickey Mouse.

We'll take that shut and shut up your ass Take it back. Take it back. Take it back. Take it back.

Take it back. Take it back. Take it back. Take it right back Okay, let's do make it on a switch Mickey tries to tell her what to do.

I'll say you better watch out I'm gonna fuck that goofy motherfucker the fuck boy goofy motherfucker His shirt so stupid in his ride is cute. So I'll give him a little bit of the boo I Float for about 36 seconds. This is a rabbit's streak and fire with you I think this is what Walt Disney envision when he built the Magic Kingdom a couple motherfuckers in the garage Singing about how many's a hot? Feel like all of this is clips Can I do my makeup whoa Hi Brad Pitt that's crazy.

I'm ready for the family cookout On a scale of one to a river runs through it. How likely am I to become Brad Pitt's girlfriend? Okay before or after the hair styling. Let's go with before.

Let's go with after okay, so after pretty likely pretty likely pretty likely should Jen Aniston watch the F. I don't know if they're dating, but I know they probably still have love for each other. They definitely still have Love for each other. Did you see the friends reunion?

I didn't did you I did I had to why did you have to cuz I it was on HBO Max and I was like it's being advertised on billboards and stuff and I was like curious much yes Yeah, absolutely How are you not gonna be able to like be in life if you don't stay up with what's on bill box? Seriously if I don't watch everything that James Gordon put out am I even living anywhere? I'm not living. I don't think I'm living.

I'm living up in that thing This message brought to you by Kardashian nation Kardashians offering nothing for the world except for photoshopped asses and hips Hey, I'm gonna kiss Travis Barker. Who is that? That's one of the Kardashians. Yeah Travis Barker Oh, no wait Do you think that we could keep a conversation going and asking a question that answers the question we asked but also opens up another question Into the conversation Do you think that it's possible that that could be a likelihood of this podcast?

But if we take it in another direction that that could be good too Have you ever thought about the fact that we're on the same page and sometimes when we're together There's like a magical mystery to earth or both on that we didn't realize that we had fucking season tickets to Did you know that this podcast comes with water? I told her I told her I The little behind the scenes I was like hey, I usually don't record this time of the day So dress cool just in case it's warmer outside That's my dress cool. Is your dress cool? I look like Jennifer grave from Dirty dancing yes, or you look like JLo as a flight dancer and living color Super sensitive I mean Conor McGregor fucking broke his foot on an elbow is that what it was from my lips to God's ears?

I watched that video over and over That expression from my lips to guys years was just a woman queefing. That's a wonderful tweet I think it's a wonderful tweet and now I wish I had said it and I'm probably gonna break one of your equipments Water break water break. Hmm. Hey, so what kind of water are you drinking a jazzy me?

You know I really like to get my water inspiration from whatever hot girl there is hawking water like Jen Ance was Smart water smart water right so now we're really on a new wave of fart water Mmm fart water Yeah, because there's a lot of pollution in the world and we're using sustainability to hydrate What's more sustainable than a fart? I mean, you know manure grows flowers fart water can grow internal hydration fart water is the essence of life Surely that's beautiful. You're motivational. Thank you so much.

I believe I saw that on a plaque in marshals. Did you really? Yeah? Did you think of card of cars because I returned the 45 sweaters?

I bought not a good purchase in the summertime But I couldn't beat the deal yeah, but that exactly that's why they're on sale is because it's summertime Yeah, exactly and I was like oh my god somewhere someone's gonna be chilly I need to have 14 sweaters against all my friends come over and we're all suckling I wake up called suckling suckling like parrot I think it meant suckling like y'all like gotten just like a rabbit some milk or something. Oh god. I'm thirsty This water is so effing good From your lips to God's ears. Why am I holding my fist like this?

What's over here? Is there a ghost over here? I'm getting ready to punch a fucking good on the defensive. Have you ever seen a ghost?

I've never seen a ghost no well Something's wrong with you You need to get your priorities straight and life mister and open yourself up a little bit Yeah, and open up your cheese one of your cheeses shut the fuck down because that's what helps you seek out one of my cheese Yeah, one of your chakras must be fucking blocked Oh, they said cheese like craft or like macaroni or block a bitch up to put it in a different way, right? Right, right. Did you have an edible? Who does it?

Hand it to me on the way in did they yeah with a bottle of water fart water and edible is that what everybody gets there that guy wasn't with us Oh shit. Hopefully it wasn't methy. It could have been a little bit of methy I'm gonna be Jesse May into methy May. It's gonna be a fun fucking Wednesday is it Wednesday?

Methy may pull it though. Hey guys. Hey guys. It's a messy may pull it up here.

I just Met this bad kids We gotta do a water break fire water fight water Mmm if you could if you had to do a drug yeah hardcore, okay had to add to had to forced or you die what drug would you go to? Hard core it has to be hardcore drug. Yeah, like the ones that people usually die probably heroin Heron or PCP ACP is acid dangi dust yeah, what you call me? That's also what comes out of a woman when she queefs an angel test Every time a woman queen Jesse and I and angel gets a wing Time to hear mom a queen just know an angel's just got its wings How's it double set of wings or just a single set like fair wings where there's like a lower set of wings and an upper bigger set of wings Or is it like shitty little fucking fly wings?

Oh, there's a little shitty wings and go and take it nowhere and take it nowhere They can be fully filled wings Baby what why are you talking about flies and stuff mommy's trying to tell you a poem about a queef and you turn it into little fly wings Cuz I get distracted by all the types of wings. Why can't there be one wing? Why has it got to be so many varietals varietals cause me stress? I get option paralysis.

So you're saying every time an angel gets his wings. You thought an airplane wing could shoot out of an angel Have you ever not seen it? Yes, it's hard when it's a double negative ain't it? Right yeah cuz you're not sure if you answer in the affirmative or the negative well that's up to Jesus I guess it is I guess it is I guess we'll find out this Sunday if you're even allowed through the doors Oh, you might burst in the flame you Satan spiller Regret that and I will tell you I it's I tell you my mother told me not to spill nothing if it comes out of Jesus or your husband You keep every drip drop for yourself because you never know I'm just gonna be a famine You don't know who's watching you don't know when the raptors coming back You don't know what an in and out is doing in a state that it doesn't belong to you don't know what it's doing there It's like what kind of witchcraft is happening here You also don't know if you're related to everybody at your family reunion No, there's some people who are what we call stuff stuff.

Yeah, Uncle Larry says And Deborah so it's all the way Queen's us Queen's us Queen of the Suss. They're located. It's been touched by something He's an angel. He's an angel back naked right there.

He's been through a lot. He's been through a lot He's been through a lot cuz he's got fatal alcohol syndrome. Yeah, which means he loves beer. Hey He started drinking out of the doggy bowl since I put it out for him at the family picnic Oh, he drinks like that.

That sounds that sounds a little sus. That sounds like it came right from scripture I'm sorry. I was just doing my what I saw him do. I mean it sounds like a devil jerking off So heroin would be pretty tight You know, I think that you know, there's probably a reason why people get addicted to it Yeah, I would say it's probably the most addictive thing on earth.

Yeah, probably probably I think so Yeah, do you think it's a bad idea to take somebody who used to be addicted to it asking for a left ovary? I think that it's just something to note in my iPhone notes. They're like my soul notes boys my mother's okay Remind me the beginning of every month theory The guy that I'm about to start dating what used to be hooked on heroin and that could be an impact on the reason why he behaves in certain ways Thank you for the reminder and I will talk to you next month. I love you Siri.

Bye You joke, but it's not a half bad idea. It's not a half bad idea Just like checking in every month and be like wait a second. I did forget that he said that about himself Yeah, I did forget that he used to be addicted He's a junkie, but now he's my junkie. Yeah, and if he's a junkie for me if I'm his new vice rather than a heroin That's healthy, right?

Oh totally to be someone's drug is tote healthy. Yeah, absolutely Like make sure that you know you're the only focus in their life and they don't have any other priorities Oh god, that's the healthiest way to have a really actual shop. Yeah, I think that's how you have a healthy operation I'm not wrong. Yeah, I mean, basically what you didn't want to have a buy by I think it was at least a marriage Guys, I don't budget me.

I don't know what yeah I can't wait to see the captions of that. Mm-hmm. See if I got it right. We'll see see you guys next week We'll be back next week with the report on what happened with those subtitles on the show And the opioid crisis in my in myself I Can't tell if you're ship captain or pop-eye.

Hey, I'm a sheep You're giving me like Dave Kool-e-a Right, right. All right. Do you think Dave said the only way he was gonna do the shows if he could do his is if he could be a Guys topical news, let's talk about the cast of flowers What okay, we should always be checking in with them seeing what they're doing Who's who do you think is the most annoying cast member? Oh the most annoying on the show or the actual outside of the show?

That's a really good question on the show. Let's go on the show. We'll start nice Well on the show they wrote it this way the Kimmy Gibbler is the most right but I feel like she's probably in real life Most of the time those people are usually really nice because they're playing against Whatever, right, you know, I mean yeah, she probably is like the nicest one out of the whole cast Yeah, cuz she had to play that annoying character. Yeah, yeah I don't think anybody else would have taken that role.

Maybe it's Teddy Who's Teddy? Just clipping that from the podcast who's Teddy? You're just stirring your tea you just get outing me That's really good Sorry I had to clear out whatever was left in my throat. That's okay.

It's all right. It's all the drips of Satan Yeah, did you ever use to do the waterfalls with friends? I just did it on my shirt. Did you?

Yep? Whoa? This this bod guy's just got real different. Oh my god.

Oh It's so wet What's going on you're my stepmom? I know and I'm like a 16 My stepmom 16. What's going on? Dude, I'm all welcome to the housewives of some small town in West Virginia Dude my mom's 16.

I'm super developed for a 12 year old. You're so dumb You're like you're the deepest voice ever Get real people Did it No, we started creepy when you shut that garage door like jigsaw Turn around I'm like you ready to podcast or what it was like the end of the first saw where he slams the door shut That should be the only way How do you remember that? I love those psalm of ease they're great and in uh, and I actually did a saw bit for years in my stand-up You did and your stand-up and my stand-up and my say it's on my special. I do a bit about saw The premises.

I don't want to hear it. It's not over. It's watered down the wrong How occurred was that that whole year? Oh, go anytime watered down the wrong throat hole this past year?

Yeah, it's not go Paul it's pollen this pollen. It's all it anybody with cat dandard dust and pollen allergies were screwed last year and I have terrible allergies I don't know why You're listening all those things and I have terrible herpes And I have terrible choice in that like you're just introducing the dust in the pollen What is one thing in your life as a man which is coming to a wrap up Jeremiah's gonna be post out of any second here ladies He's turning up he's turning the corner and he's about to pass the baton of his mail into a female real quick I mean, what is that guy even wearing a tank dumbin about? Yeah, I mean canceling immediately We'll be right back after this commercial break I might Jeremiah wonders is brought to you by upstart. Do you dread looking at your credit card statement every month?

I don't blame you. I'm at the alamo But upstart can help upstart is the fast and easy way to get a personal loan to pay off your debt all online I've had a bunch of debt and it sucks. Sometimes you need a little bit extra help That's why I'm recommending upstart Whether it's paying off credit cards or consulting your debt over half a million people have used upstart to get a simple fix monthly payment Unlike other lenders upstart looks a lot more than just like your credit score like your income and your employment history This means they can offer smarter rates and trusted partners. Just a five-minute online rate check right David Crockett Prove the same day and can receive funds as fast as one business day If debt is taking over your life, it's time to get a fresh start with upstart Where you're more than your credit score Find out how upstart can lower your monthly payments today when you go to upstart.com slash Jeremiah those people just signed up That's upstart.com slash Jeremiah.

Don't forget to use our URL to let them know that I sent you And I have to throw in this disclaimer loan amounts will be determined based on your credit income and certain other information provided in your loan application And now go to upstart.com slash Jeremiah and enjoy the alamo friends Do you riff like this with other people like in person how we know um special people Not like special needs, but like hold on. I'm gonna get ready Oh god that left That made me look a witch to see that part I'm ready to go into my my layer. Are you ready for the show? You want to come into my little witches there and that's what I call my vagina I'm just like I've got portions and of potions and my witches lie.

I'm having a child When I have a Houston faction. I call it my golden makuchi cold drive makuchi cold Double double clown travel double word tampon Scrubble Go down on me with your beard and stubble that hurts stubble. Yeah guys have to be careful with that Look, really. Yeah, it's you gotta be gentle down there.

I think probably right now I'd probably be uh, I'd have to to smooth it out a little bit. Yeah, just a little bit just a little bit a little wild It is you're starting to look like you're on rump spring up. There's a mountain man. I'm just a mountain man Just trying to leave out here Oh wow, what are you doing in the woods?

Well, I came out here originally just trying to find myself But then that was there 40 years ago. Did you find anything? I found a lot of things I found a lightning boat trail that went all the way to that mountain back there a trail of lightning books Yeah, the lightning books led me up that mountain back there. What was there when you got up there?

Well a lot of self-reflection and sadness God that must have been jarring use jarring speaking of jars Do you want to try some of my homemade dreams? I've been making over the years your homemade what homemade what homemade what homemade what homemade? What homemade jam? Whoa homemade jam.

Yeah, what kind of jam? Yeah, these bears are mowers and boys and bears blueberries peaches apricots all kinds of grams Is that in one jar? Yes. That seems like a little overwhelming for the palace.

It is. It's like a smoothie, but for jams A smoothie, but for jam. Yeah, that's pretty genius. Yeah, I'm thinking about calling in that But I don't have any business people to learn that way anything like that What if you follow that lightning trail back up the mountain and see if there's maybe an epiphany?

There's only a sadness up there. Okay Don't look up that you're wrong. What happened? You left alone to your thoughts and realizing that the best days that you thought about with your family were just a few years back Sometimes I think about the good times I have with family and then I realized that they're all gone Literally everyone's dead.

Literally everyone's dead. Everyone's dead. Everyone's dead. Everyone's dead.

Everyone's dead. Everyone's dead. Is she apocalypse? Oh, yeah.

Wait, what are you doing here? I'm gonna kill you and take your place. Why would you kill me? Because I fear that what's gonna happen is that we start to co-inhabit in each other's space.

Why can't we coexist? Because then I might what happens is I'm gonna start to find you attractive just on an evolutionary level And we're gonna have to make and I don't know if I can do that. Well, when was the last time you were with somebody special like myself? I don't know what I can say.

I was ever with someone special like you. Thank you Have you seen the movie The Hills Have Eyes? Yes. Hey, you're giving me Hills Have Eyes vibes.

You're giving me the Hills Have Fives vibes. Girl look thick right now. I like it. Look at very in red Ozark moment.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which by the way, the Ozarks are scary. The series or the Ozarks in general? The series is great.

But the Ozarks in general, you get up it. I've mentioned West Virginia a couple of times and anybody lives in West Virginia just calm the fuck down. Okay. There's bad times in the game.

She doesn't know the dreams. Well, I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna. Me, Jamie.

Me, Jamie. I think I got there too quick. I think there's a couple more verses. There she walks in the room.

She grabs a coat and uses a broom. Mary Sewhispers little things. She walks around and shakes away. What are people gonna think when they watch this?

They're gonna be like, can I more please? Is it usually like this? When I like it? Oh, oh, how'd you get in the comedy?

Oh, I know. Do you really want to listen anymore of those? No. Those are done.

It's over. Hey, guess what? Mark, Marin, you're a pioneer. I get it.

Okay, but like I'm done with that style. I'm over it. 30 minutes of pandering and complaining about your cat. We're over it.

Is that too personal? No, it's getting deep. As soon as I said, Mark, Marin, I didn't mean it out loud. Oh, sorry.

I just I always said the two things I know that he does on his podcast. Complaining cats. Well, that should be his new title. Complaining with cats.

Yeah. Captain complaining cat planing. He is the cat lady of the podcast. You said it.

Uh oh. I drove us there, but you said it. Don't clip that. Clippet.

No, don't clip it. I love Mark, but I don't think he likes me. Who gives a shit? I think that's his whole aesthetic.

Maybe that's what it is. Maybe I'm reading into his vibe too much. Marin does not want to be liked. Otherwise, he'd make more eye contact.

Now, is this Marin's internal monologue? Yeah, this is Marin. Just hanging out. I don't look at anybody because somebody looks at me that makes me and I don't want to be seen because I don't like who I am.

If someone sees me from who I am before I've acknowledged the fact that I don't like the way I am, it's going to get real fucked up real fast and I just rather walk through the hallways at the comedy store and avoid fucking eye contact and go home with my cats. Welcome back to Burning Red. I read something I was with Justin Martindale and we were walking on Abbot Can I? And there was this funny sign that said, may the bridges I've burned light my way.

Oh, that seems like that seems like something that Justin Martindale would say. He looked at it and loved it. Oh, I bet. Yeah, it was on a plate.

It was on a plate. It was on a plate. It's a very I don't want I don't want my plates to tell me things other than eat. Right.

I don't think we need to have an affirmation on a dish. Probably not. Or stencils on certain walls. I don't think we need stencils on walls.

I don't think so. I think they're done. I think they're done. I think they had a good run.

They're definitely so popular in many places in Texas. Oh, there's a lot. I mean, god, in the Midwest and the South, stencils are huge. We have a stencil on our baby room.

That's a baby. That's different. It's the name so you don't forget it. If you're listening on audio, we're sorry.

I apologize. There's a lot of faces going on. There's a lot of sign language. I'm going to crack my back.

Do it. Have you ever been to a chiropractor? I've ever been with a chiropractor at cracker. If I went to a chiropractor that was at a cracker barrel that I could eat while I was getting my back cracked pancake and readjustments.

Big money. Bitch. Bitch. A big money bitch.

I will say I fucking love a cracker barrel. I hate trash. You don't? I don't eat trash.

I don't eat fast food. Really? Yeah. I'd rather starve than eat McDonald's.

No offense, but that's chemical trash. I had this one college professor in the one class that I took that I went to. It was English writing and he always had the white foam on the corners of his mouth, which makes me nauseous. Anybody who has the foam, I'm so self-conscious I'm constantly wiping my lips because it makes me grossed out, but I used to have it every morning and it caused me nausea.

But I remember this one day he had his white foamy lips and he was like, just out of the blue. We're talking about English and proper sentence structure and all that. And then he goes, McDonald's is cancer. Just yells it.

Just out of nowhere. And it's stuck with me. It's stuck with me. It haunts you.

What's a, if it's not fast food, if you don't eat fast food, then what is that cheat thing that you'll get where you're like, oh, this is my thing that I want to like gorge on? Cheeseburgers. Okay. It's like good cheeseburgers.

Like grass-fed as much as possible. Oh, but how do you get that late at night though? I don't eat late at night anymore. Oh, I gave that up.

Even though. For Lenny. But I find that that'd be difficult with the amount of weed you smoke. You just think so.

You would think so. You would just have changed your schedule where it doesn't affect it. Yeah. And I've also learned how to fast and I fast more now.

I need that way more than I used to. Yeah. I will do. I mean, I literally was at canner's last night.

That's not a good example. But I don't know what you just said. I literally was at canner's last night. So I mean, that's not a good example.

Did Bradley Cooper from a star's born just coming to the room? I'm just looking real quick. You're not just looking. You're beautiful.

Hello. Jack. Is his name Jack? I'm sure.

Jack. Jack. Jack. Come back.

Oh wait. That's the wrong jack. That's a Titanic Jack. Yeah.

I'm not on a iceberg. Off the deep. Watch my last name. Meet your mom.

I'm crashing in your wedding while you fucking shedding. I want to meet your mom. I'm still over. Are you?

I'm still alone over. This is really good actually. Thank you. What's his fucking name?

Jackson Jackson Jackson Jackson. I refuse to Google me as well. Her name was Ellie. Ellie.

And Jackson Maine. I think Maine is something completely different. Maine. Isn't that something like an animal gets or something?

Maine. Yeah. Mean g? Yeah.

Yeah. That's what you get when you bet a Kardashian. Maine. Yeah.

Show an MBC this fall. Open mange. Open mange. Open mange.

No. Okay. Please. Jack.

Jack. Jackson Maine. Okay. That's something like that.

What was that song she sang? Everybody's saying at the top of their lungs and their cars at red lights. Oh of course. And the show.

Everyone's like don't. I was like Liza Manelli on skip. No. Did you see that new Liza Manelli movie that came out?

With Renee Zalaga? No. Me neither. You should have a parental advisory.

It should be a pop rental advisory from this episode of People Should Smoke Pop Before The Flash. They should. They should. They should.

I reached out to people on the internet and they reached right back. Is that ask Jesse Maine any questions or scene suggestions? And we got some good. I'm excited.

This one comes from, is just a question from my pal at Mikey McCurnan. He says what's your favorite place to smoke weed? Favorite place? Wow.

That's a good question. It depends on my mood, but in nature, lots of lush green, specifically like a completely engulfed canopy of trees on a trail deep away from like miles away from from houses and habitation and highway noise and deep in the in nature where you just can't make any moves, but on a place that was created by her. You know. By mother?

No. By Walmart. You call Walmart her? I do don't you?

I've never really thought of her as a her or she. Wow. Just as a being with this living. I thought of her more as a corporation.

You're right. Next question. This one comes from a car Blanchon underscore 75. Do that thing be farted?

Like what like am I the thing or is my pussy the thing? I need I need like the specification of the thing. What is the thing? The follow ups.

Like do I fart? I just thought that that was so such a funny question. It is a funny question. The fact that somebody typed that.

Oh no. You want to hear another one that somebody typed? Yes I do. At Luxurious underscore.

Lenny. She enjoy a good tongue punching of the old farm. A tongue punch of the fart box. I will answer that honestly.

The next week's sharp tongue. Bye guys. Thanks. Thank you so much.

I I do enjoy a little bit of the ass play, but I have to make sure that I've taken precautions to make sure I'm fully comfortable. And if there has been multiple penetrations that can create air pockets. And then when there's bumping those air pockets really side of your asshole in the form of a fart, which makes you feel a little bit vulnerable. But then again, who gives a fuck if you're getting some you're lucky.

So take on the farts. But to answer the question not from luxury, Lenny. Sorry. Only Brad Pitt can tongue punch my fart box.

Clip that. Done. Oh, this is Cozan, the mailman on Instagram says, murderer, you guys have to be Brittany and her dad arguing over the conservatorship. You did it again, Brittany.

I did what? You're not paying attention to what needs to happen in this house. Yeah, let me live my life. You don't know how.

Okay, you're going crazy. You're going crazy. And I'm shutting it down mainly because I don't want to work. Yeah, I'm going crazy.

And you just can't see. I can see I see all the checks I sign from your work. And I'm going to cash them and go on vacations because that's what I really want. I'm not really concerned about your well being.

I know dad should be crazy, but it feels all right. I want the world to think you're crazy. So I can continue making money. I don't want to think of you every night.

Well, you're going to have to because daddy signs those checks and cash is when I think of you. It keeps me up at night, dad. That's how that's where we're at right now. Exactly.

And that's where I want you to be in a constant straight state of stress because that keeps me able to control you. And I want to control you because I don't want to control myself. And I never made nothing of myself. And I look at you as my failure and I have to control that so that I can make money.

I need to survive a lifestyle that I don't deserve. It's called white entitlement. This is an FMK. Oh, okay.

F. Mary, Kill, Ryan Sickler, Bobby Lee, and Chris D'Efano. Oh, this is so easy. Do you not say fuck on this?

We can. Okay, but you didn't. So have I been breaking the fucking rules? No, not at all.

So why did you omit the up? I do FMKs on the show. FMK. Fuck Mary Kill.

Fuck Mary Kill. What you said F Mary Kill. So that leaves me to believe you're some sort of Puritan. Are you a fucking Puritan?

What? What? I'm not a Puritan. You look like one.

What? No, I don't. Yeah, you look like you teach Ashjanga yoga. Ashjanga yoga?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. As long as you're not going to enter me.

If that's something that you would like for me to not do, then I will not do that. I don't want you to do that. You would not like me to enter you. No, not at all.

Not at least until you get some hair relaxer. That is your choice as a being on the Earth. You don't have to have to make love with me as your yoga instructor. But I am here if you need a stretch.

What? I just was it. You were my new. I thought you were walking.

I couldn't have had you think. I was like that. I was like that. I was like that.

I was like that. I was like that. You look like a really active keniji. Thank you very much.

Someone's knocking on your door. Is it fake? It's God. Oh, what does he have to say?

He says you're a Puritanical bitch. A botanical or Puritanical? You're Puritanical. Puritanical?

But you smell botanical but that makes sense because you teach yoga. Botanical Gardens. That's what I call my kid in care. That's what I call my asshole.

Yeah. Fuck Mary Kill Ryan Sickler, Bobby Lee or Chris DeStefano. That question comes from Miki Ka Kano Vick. I'm gonna kill.

I'm gonna marry Sickler. Obvi. That's Obvi. Yeah, because I'm gonna have such great chemistry.

It may happen in real life. Who knows? Cool. So I'm Mary Sickler.

I'm gonna have to kill DeStef. We got enough white guys. If I kill an Asian, it's hate crime. That is a great point.

And if I fuck an Asian, it's a love crime. A crime of passion. Okay. So I'm gonna, I'm gonna marry Six.

I'm gonna fuck Lee. And I'm gonna kill the other white guy. Sorry, DeStef. Bye.

I'll send a check to your kids every month for six cents. Perfect. So that they remember that you're still alive in their hearts. Corey W Wright wants us to do some Ryan Sickler impressions.

Hey, what are you doing? Come on now. Go on now. Slap me twice and call me on a dude.

Come on now. Come on, crap. But what was it like to perform your first abortion? This show brought you my whole name.

The whole thing. The whole thing. That's just a city. Come on.

Maryland's a state. Who got Bradley? I'm sponsored by Graff. Oh God.

Hopefully not. I think we nailed it. We did. You're welcome.

I love you Sickle Cell. Anemia. This one. Oh, automotive underscore ADHD.

I'd love to hear her pick you up at a bar. Oh my God. You look just like Ryan Gosling. If you got a little bit less oxygen in the womb.

Thanks. That's fine. Thanks. I think Ryan Gosling.

What's your name? It's a compliment Ryan Gosling. Right. I'm ovulating.

That's not my name. It's just my current state of being. Oh, I was wondering if you wanted to maybe like get on my cycle and procreate. I know it's really fast.

Like a one-night stamp kind of thing or like an 18-year stand? Oh. I saw you pull up in that car out front. That G-Wagon.

Yeah. I mean, that's mine. Yeah. What do you do?

I'm in the crypto. Like creepy stuff? You have snacks and dead bodies. You're a crypto?

No, that's that's a neck row. Gross. But I guess I could be open to things. How are you right now?

It's cool. I can feel like I just left my left. Forlopes. Forlopes?

Yeah, it's the tubes. It's the tubes. Don't worry. I can really feel which side my egg leaves each month.

It feels like that. It feels like pressure, pressure, pressure. Then it feels like it's like passing little kidney stones from Jesus from my queen flips to God's ears. And then when the egg goes down and travels, I hear a little.

Hey, anything for the gram? Hey, put it on ice. They might go bad. Next question.

Did we answer the question? I don't even remember what it was. I think we did. Oh, yeah.

I saw an insult guy. I compliment him in the 90s, almost sex. Right. Pretty standard.

Um, this got a lot of likes, but I don't know what this is referring to. Okay. Underscore Brandon Bolton underscore. Why does she hurt Yannis?

Did you say they'd be honest? I did. You know, I was I was taking Cosby's put pictures to sleep master course and I nailed it. You know, it's really when you commit yourself when you I wanted to learn something in quarantine and master it.

Sure. And I chose the Spanish fly 101 that Cosby was teaching at riveting riveting, right? I you can put people to sleep within minutes. It's the course is like six seconds long.

It just shows you how the amount of stuff to put into the drink. And then the rest is just fun. You just improvise. So back to Yannis.

Um, why did I hurt Yannis? This is my favorite thing when people think they know your relationship and what happened. Um, people hurt people. And when you break up, everyone hurts everyone.

And mine was in the form of fisting him at 20 Starks. With all the infinity stuff. Instead of snapping, you just went up there. And that's all I heard.

And I'm sorry, but for everything else. I'm not. Yannis is a very talented man. Yeah.

He's hilarious. He's great. Why don't you ask him why he hurt me? Whoa.

What's his name? Bolton Michael Bolton. What's this guy's name? Brandon Bolton.

Yeah. Michael Bolton's kid. Yeah. Why did your why did your dad hurt at all the women in the 80s?

Yeah. Huh? That's something for you to think about, dude. Do we answer the question?

Yeah. Why did I hurt Yannis? I like it's also such a funny, um, it's really indicative of society. What do they just assume that the woman did that?

Yeah. What about Yannis? Huh? Yeah.

What did Yannis do? There's two people. Welcome back to what did Yannis do? Welcome back to WTF did Yannis do you know what Yannis did do become friends with fucking stamos?

Root. He knew. He knew what he was doing. That's that he doesn't want to be friends with him.

So you want to get back at me? Yeah. And I am I'm starting a campaign today. Really?

Yes. I don't know. It's called I'm just starting with you. Oh, you're starting with Yannis.

Nothing to do with Yannis. But probably like a food driver or something. Okay. Cool.

Yeah. Okay. Rhymes against humanity on Instagram. What is the better bite of a burrito first or last?

I have a very strong opinion on this one. That's a tough one because the first bite can burn your fucking mouth and ruin the rest. And the last can be a little sloppy with the juices. Everything kind of is dragged to the bottom.

That's why I like it. It's marinated. I'm going with the last. It's the last bite every time.

As long as you save enough innards so that you're not getting all flour. Tortilla. Well, yeah, you got to do the right proportions. Can we talk about the importance of how the innards are entered into the tortilla?