EPISODE · Mar 10, 2026 · 52 MIN
Ladies, If He’s Not Giving 100%, Kick Him to the Curb
from The Devil You Don’t Know · host Lindsay Oakes
Send us Fan MailEver felt your stomach knot because someone you love keeps you guessing? We’ve been there, and we’re calling it out: when a partner is only “60% in,” you end up giving 100% of your peace. We dig into the quiet ways people get trained to accept less—cold feet before a wedding reframed as “nerves,” infidelity excused as “a phase,” and late-night vanishing acts dressed up as “freedom.” If your days revolve around decoding texts, competing with other women, or lowering your bar to keep the vibe light, you’re not in a partnership—you’re in survival mode.We break down the sunk cost trap that keeps smart, loving people stuck. Time invested, shared friends, deposits paid, even the dream of kids can feel like anchors, but they’re not reasons to abandon yourself. Leaving earlier hurts; leaving later devastates. So we name the real signs of a 100% partner: he doesn’t downgrade the relationship when life gets messy; he doesn’t make you compete for attention; he owns his words, plans the future, cools off without quitting, and returns to repair. That’s not perfection. That’s presence.We also tackle fear and scarcity head-on: the myth that “all the good ones are taken,” the dread of being single after 30 or 40, the pull to fix people who told you from day one they don’t want commitment. You can’t perform your way into someone’s certainty. Boundaries are not ultimatums—they are clarity. Define your non-negotiables, believe people the first time, and leave while you still have power. You are not an applicant. You’re a partner, and calm love—the kind that feels like oxygen, not a test—is possible when you require it.If this hits a nerve, share it with a friend who needs the reminder, subscribe for more real talk each week, and leave a quick review to help others find the show. Your story might be the lifeline someone else needs.Please email us at [email protected]
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Send us Fan Mail Ever felt your stomach knot because someone you love keeps you guessing? We’ve been there, and we’re calling it out: when a partner is only “60% in,” you end up giving 100% of your peace. We dig into the quiet ways people get trained to accept less—cold feet before a wedding reframed as “nerves,” infidelity excused as “a phase,” and late-night vanishing acts dressed up as “freedom.” If your days revolve around decoding texts, competing with other women, or lowering your bar t...
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Ladies, If He’s Not Giving 100%, Kick Him to the Curb
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