Latino Love

Cayden Eldridge grew up on the East Coast, just outside Washington, DC. He was raised by a Chilean mother and an American father. Annual visits to Chile where he spent time with his nine aunts and uncles and thirty-five first cousins made a huge impact on his life. Today Cayden lives in Lafayette, CO and works in IT. He has just come out of an eight year relationship and for the first time is exploring life as a single man. I got to know Cayden during the Boulder County fires in December of 2021. He was my downstairs neighbor and I was the only one living at my friend Laura’s house. We spent hours together on the sofa, waiting to be evacuated. During these endless hours, we bonded and talked about life and love, soon realizing how similar our relationship dynamics were. Just like my husband Pata, Cayden was raised in a very traditional latino way. His mother catered to him. His ex-partner Betty and I, on the other hand, were raised to be independent and take on chores at a very young age. Pata and Cayden bring a calm and grounded energy. They can go with the flow, get things done in their own way and are not hard on themselves or us. Betty and I are a bit more like fire. We love our independence, prefer to be in control and need our alone time. While perfectionism can drive us (at times to insanity), this word does not really exist in their vocabulary. Opposites attract and can bring so much beauty and growth, they can also create challenges. Sharing stories and moments about our relationships, helped us both understand ‘the other side’ without the charged emotion that can weigh on a romantic relationship. Any loving and passionate partnership will be work. And communication is the only way through. The trick is finding the right words and the right time. “Humans aren’t easy.”