Life After Being an Ecstasy “Connoisseur” & MDMA-Fueled Raver, and the K-Hole That Scared Me Straight

Born in Italy to Russian parents, Dan came to the U.S. as a baby and grew up in a highly driven immigrant community near Princeton, New Jersey. An only child, he was pushed hard to be successful in academics and athletics, with video games becoming an early escape. As a teenager, he turned to marijuana and alcohol, escalating after his mother passed away during his senior year. He headed to college in 2013, where he bounced between fraternities for drug- and alcohol-related issues while throwing himself into lifting and bodybuilding. At a rave, he was introduced to MDMA, soon followed by cocaine, ketamine, and psychedelics. Despite the severe anxiety waves and emotional volatility that followed, he completed a mechanical engineering degree, stayed for a master’s in financial engineering, and moved to New York to work on Wall Street.There he tried to balance long finance hours with alcoholism, cocaine addiction, compulsive dating, and intense strength training. As he dove deeper into raves and festivals, he began to refer to himself as an ecstasy “connoisseur.” In 2022, he relocated to Los Angeles for a new job, still using while adding jiu jitsu, running, and competitive bodybuilding. A frightening ketamine episode, a collapsed relationship, and months of white-knuckle abstinence pushed him toward change. Inspired by discipline-focused figures online, in 2024 he committed to addiction recovery, found a sponsor in Studio City, and began working the 12 steps. After a relapse tied to his MDMA addiction in May 2024, he restarted his sobriety on May 21 and returned to the steps with urgency. He left banking for full-time personal training, completed a full inventory with a new sponsor, and eventually began sponsoring others.In May 2025, he stepped back on the bodybuilding stage sober—this time pairing competition with a life grounded in discipline, service, and the steps.GUESTDan VaysburdDan is a Certified Personal Trainer (NASM) and Nutrition Coach (Precision Nutrition). His strength-based system helps clients achieve success without intense workouts, extreme diets, and expensive supplements. He offers online coaching to anyone worldwide through phone and video conference.Learn more about personal trainer and nutrition coach Dan VaysburdFollow Dan on Instagram @dan.vaysburdMatt Handy is the founder of Harmony Grove Behavioral Health in Houston, Texas, where their mission is to provide compassionate, evidence-based care for anyone facing addiction, mental health challenges, and co-occurring disorders.Find out more at harmonygrovebh.com  My Last Relapse explores what everyone is thinking but no one is saying about addiction and recovery through conversations with those whose lives have changed.For anyone disillusioned with traditional recovery and feeling left out, misunderstood, or weighed down by unrealistic expectations, this podcast looks ahead—rejecting the lies and dogma that keep people from imagining life without using.Got a question for us? Leave us a message or voicemail at mylastrelapse.comFind us on YouTube @MyLastRelapse and follow Matt on Instagram @matthew.handy.17About Harmony Grove Behavioral Health Harmony Grove delivers outpatient addiction and mental health treatment focused on wellness, creativity, and authentic human connection—providing a supportive space for healing that extends beyond traditional clinical care.Harmony Grove’s IOP in Houston, Texas, is more than a program; it’s a lifeline for those ready to take the next step in their recovery. We are ready to meet you where you are and find your unique path to change. If you’re feeling overwhelmed or struggling, you don’t have to face it alone. Reaching out for support is a sign of strength, and help is always available. If you or anyone you know needs help, give us a call 24 hours a day at 844-430-3060.Host: Matthew HandyProducer: Eva SheieAssistant Producers: Mary Ellen Clarkson & Hannah BurkhartEngineering: Chris MannTheme music: Survive The Tide, Machina AeonCover Art:  DMARKMy Last Relapse is a production of Kind Creative: kindcreative.comQuestions this episode answers:How does a high-performing Russian Jewish kid from Princeton end up addicted to cocaine and ecstasy?Why did a video game addiction at age 10 set the stage for harder drug addiction later?What does addiction look like when there's zero trauma, a loving family, and every advantage in life?How does a Wall Street finance career and cocaine use become impossible to separate?Is recovery only real if you go to meetings — or can you build it entirely differently?What is the single best sign that someone is genuinely in recovery — and it has nothing to do with meetings?How do you give back in sobriety when the traditional sponsor model doesn't fit your life?