Talk about runs. I mean, I would put the Chili Peppers there for having like, five great albums, like in a row, pretty much. Or maybe more, you know? But that's me.
So people don't like... I liked you. What? I thought you were great.
I'm still right now. What? Chili Peppers are the worst. No way.
Oh, is that what's going on? I was like, the energy shifted. I'm like lyrics like, Skebbito-Bone, but getting the domed in. You don't like that part?
Come on. I'm not coming up. I'm not coming up. I'm not coming up.
I never come in. No. I never scayed around and went, go do better. He really beat me.
No. Yeah. Welcome to the show, maybe. Welcome.
That was great. I'm glad I put those headphones on. That was amazing. I didn't know what I was in for.
Yeah, told you. Because of course I've never listened to them. But neither is anybody else. That was really cool.
I felt weird sitting down for that. I feel like I should have been standing. Not like it was an anthem. If we had a big dude, you know what's crazy is the guitars were played.
Like, Scotty and played that. No way. That's dope. That was awesome.
It was insane. That was really cool. Yeah, it was really cool. Is that hurt?
You're thrilled to sing like that? No, I'm professional. Wow. That was awesome.
Yeah, that was a lie. Dude, you didn't see this, Michael. But I did a show with with Kalee for the other day with Tony Hall. And Tony was like, you guys both like our singers.
And it was just like, oh, yeah. I was like, I was on the build. Right. He's like, no, I was like, yeah, we were at one point.
I told him that we showed when we're on the series. We told everybody to get the song. Straight. We were number one on iTunes.
The whole album, one to 14, we were number one to number 14. And then the number 15 was like, I believe it was an Aussie song, correct? I don't remember. I know we dominated.
Well, the metal charts, yeah, and we dominated the Canadian charts for rock, I think. I don't think we had like the number one song on iTunes or anything like that. The metal charts, yeah. Yeah.
And then he called me the underground king. Whoa. And I was like, I need that as a promo. And they were like, it's not going to really do anything for the show.
And I was like, I don't care about the show. Most things I do don't do anything for the show. I'm a bit. Yeah.
But I was like, for my cause that's the whole festival is kind of finished. And I know it is. So the last shows that we're doing were the other day. What happened?
It doesn't do the ratings are not that it's weird because the ratings are good for us. Like us guys, it does really well. But for Tony Hawk is Tony Hawk and it doesn't do it's not like. I don't want to say your mom's house.
Like I think Tony would be happy with a half your mom's house. Sure. And that's really hard to get. He would settle for your mom studio apartment.
Yeah, but we're more like your mom's bathroom. So it's not enough for him to any works really hard. He's got all these other jobs that pay him a lot of money. And he drives to LA because a lot of famous people don't want to go to his rent to do a podcast.
Understandable. So he's driving LA. You know, he's driving like two and a half three hours each way and doing a show that makes him not. Yeah.
Anything that's what he is. And he also has like the Tony Hawk. He has a building with employees that he pays. And he's like, I'm saying no to jobs that pay a lot of money so that I can drive to Los Angeles and talk to.
Yeah. And I'm like, it's like it's actually good for me because I'm such an egotistical dickhead. And I go, this, he's bigger. He's more successful.
This is not that good for him. He loves doing it. We love doing it. But it's just not that we talk about skateboarding a lot.
And that's kind of fair. We are skateboarders. Yeah. And people in podcasting don't care that much.
You know, like the biggest podcast in skateboarding is the nine club. I don't think the nine club, whatever they pull is again, what Tony would call, I'm not going to do that for the rest of my life. I'm out. Well, I mean, I was so happy and was so cool to me.
And then also I was like, man, I can't believe Tony Hawk has to do this a little bit. No, he chooses to. And he's always gone the extra mile. I'm never like, what did he do?
Like a cameo on entourage when that was a thing. And then the next like four weeks on his show was like every actor from Entra. Because he's literally on the set. Hey, I do the show on Sirius radio.
You want to come by? Yeah. And I don't think he was making billions of dollars from that. He's like that.
And it's all the shows. Like every podcast we do at Hulk versus Wolf, he watches it from start to finish. He looks on the comments on YouTube. Like, he, and that's, and that's another reason why, you know, he's a press.
He's got multiple children. He's one of the better dads, if not the best dad I've ever seen. One is he loves his kids and he's a good guy. So he's a, he's there for him.
But he also mentioned if your dad was Tony Hawk and you were a kid. Yes. He has, Hey guys, do you want to go ride Kelly Slater's wave this weekend? Because I can't make us go.
Did he still have the Willy Wonka VIP card? No, we could just take a phone call and deliver candy anywhere. But I was a boy with him. He had a Willy Wonka card and he could just like dial the number and give him an address.
And just shit loads of candy would show up. That's why. The next day. That's crazy.
Right. And like I feel like to me, it's, he's kind of my father. Yeah, that's weird. Because now that the show's not happening, I've lost my father.
Because that was the greatest, the greatest thing that's ever happened in my life. And man, have I had a lot of great things happen in my life, but Hawk versus Wolf. Like I've been in conversations. I met Keanu Reeves.
Keanu Reeves was nice to me. He knew my name. Like I don't need any more in my life. Do it like he had a band and I was like, shut up.
That's awesome. Really dude? Like you actually pay, you, you, you googled me before the show. This is amazing.
And then the greatest thing is the animal chin ramp. Do you know what animal chin is? No. I mean, I think it's a beautiful video that came out in the early 90s, maybe 80s, I think 80s actually.
And the bones brigade and it was this thing in Australia where we just got a VHS of it. And we didn't even get, there was a bones first video. Then there was the second one, future primitive. And then the third one was animal chin.
And it was like this Japanese, they made a car. It's a movie. It was like a skateboard movie. Cool.
Well, they used a movie camera at Stacy Peralta who ended up being an actual movie director because he wanted, he had too many skills. And the bones brigade were at the time, the best dudes in the world. There was five of them and they were the best. The end of like, like, skateboarding now, there's like 150 guys.
And there's probably 50 of them that are the best, arguably, depending on who you care about. And it's constantly changing. New guys are showing up. This was back when there was probably 25 pros and the five best were on the bones brigade and they had a movie where they found this ramp at the end of the movie called the animal chin ramp.
And we didn't know all about it, but apparently they built it for one day. And these guys all skated and it was a ramp that had ramps attached to each other. So on the deck, there was mini ramps and there was a hole that they moved and they rode through and there was a spine. So a vert ramp with another vert ramp behind it.
And this was before anybody had ever done anything like this, ever. So when the movie came out and I was a vert skater, I was like, the chin ramp is insane. It's like seeing your first double neck guitar from JAPANCH. Except it was cool.
So there's that photo, right? And that's like the most famous thing in the chin ramp where all the four best dudes did hand plants next to each other on the vert spine, which is a thing that cannot be done because there's never been another ramp that is like that. So recently they built a replica of it so that the guys could ride it again in their twilight era. And we're doing the podcast and Tony's talking about it and he goes, you and I should do double hand plants on it.
Awesome. And I was like, okay, which doesn't mean anything to him. He's in the first photo and in the second photo and I'm not in the bones. I mean, I was on the bones with a different era.
And then we went and did it and the guy that shot that photo shot the photo for us. No way. So it's just this thing where we're doing it. Yeah, but that's us too.
That's awesome. And it was just like this thing where, you know, I've always, I am a skateboard. I love skateboarding. You know, you know, there's like things that I would want in my life.
But when I was 16 and I watched that video of him doing that with those guys, that's pretty cool. You took me 53 and to be in, look at that. Like that's myself and Tony Hawk doing a double emerald hand plants on the chin ramp. I can't, I just can't believe you guys can do that period alone.
I was thinking the same thing. We were about to go because he's obviously still better than me and I don't skateboard as much and doing hand plants is. It's, I can do them, but there it's a lot more. It used to be a lot easier.
Let's also, I'm imagining you're bigger now than you were. So you're a fighter now, but I'm slower. Okay. I'm actually, I'm actually bigger in my arms than I've ever been.
So it's not, you can do hands and all that kind of shit. I can do hands and I can't walk, I used to be able to walk in my hands, but I shattered this one so it doesn't flatten out. Oh shit. So I can't do, was that the hand on that?
Yeah, but when you do see how you can tell like I'm not stalling on my hand. It's more of a, you know, actually on that one, both our thumbs touched. That was kind of, it's pretty romantic. It's a, that's funny.
You guys think it's hard. I thought it was terrifying because I was like, that's not right. Like I feel somebody touching me. This is another time for anybody to be touching me.
Yeah. And I'm like, is this bad? Are we going to get stuck? But yeah, you don't really sit on your arm because we have to stay out because if we stall, we both hit each other.
Is your weight, is it more like you're touching the top there or is your way? Are you really holding yourself up there? Yeah, you're holding yourself up there. That's crazy.
There's a lot of momentum as well. Okay. So like it's mainly going up and there's a bit of weight and then you're on your way back in. Okay.
But doing a stold hand plan is when you go over the deck and you sit on your arm so you can stall for a couple seconds. That's crazy. But those are nuts. Look what would you say is the most impressive physical thing that you can do?
I can do some push-ups. Nice. I can do three to four pull-ups. Wow.
Three to four at any given moment? Any given moment? No break. No break.
No break. No, I do three to four. I'll do them in a row. What about for a hundred bucks that you do ten?
No. I know I can't. You know what I can do? Sometimes when I fuck my wife, I'm just like, I'm holding myself up.
You know what I mean? Full plank. You mean sometimes you collapse on her? No, I'm saying a lot of dudes can't do that.
And I can just hang out. A lot of dudes can't. People often confess to you. I think people are on their elbows.
I think people are like holding each other and I'm just full up there. You know what I mean? And I think that's pretty impressive. Elbows?
That sounds like way more of an ab workout. No, no, it's way easier. I'm up there. I'm doing this.
Because you're just screaming the way to cross the tower. I'm holding myself up. I can, many unlimited strokes. Wow, Louie.
Unlimited strokes. I exclusively plant on the one hand so I can put the other behind. No, you cannot. No, you cannot.
That is something great. I can't. I can. And Christmas being just around the corners for taping this perhaps I will.
Wow. We're taking mistle tote a whole other. I'm just going to say I want it to be in a room with such athletes. I'm trying to think.
That's what I do on a regular basis. What's your most impressive lifetime physical feat? Oh, once I was in India and I sat through a full Bollywood movie upstairs. No air conditioning in the middle of summer.
That was very difficult. They still talk about you over there. That's tough watching it because of how hard it was. It was the hottest I've ever been in my life.
It was a three hour sauna with a musical going on. It was horrific. Dude, have you seen that Indian movie? What's that racist that I just said Indian?
No, that's the thing. People are Indian. It is a place. Okay.
RRR. I'm just making sure because I look racist. So you got to watch it with me. RRR.
Dude. Dude. It's one of the greatest films ever made. It's easily the greatest Indian film ever made.
There's a lot of... How many Indian films have you seen? Okay, good point. Maybe two.
Wait, does Shappy count? No, that's not that. Now we've gotten racist. You know, when I lived in England because they have a huge...
Wow, that's an ad for liquid death that just happened right there. You guys are chug buddies. They gave you a hot trade idea. When I lived in India...
I'm sorry, in India because they have such an Indian population. I was going to say, whoa. They have such an Indian population and they show a decent amount of Bollywood films. Saturday morning, garbage time on TV.
Sure. And I saw... I don't think it was the first. I assume it was their knockoff of Mrs.
Doubtfire. Oh, no way. That sounds awesome. Yeah.
But the difference was, since the husband and wife had gotten divorced, I think it was a cultural thing, the divorced wife and kids had gone back to live with her father. Like she couldn't possibly be a single mom or whatever. So the dad falls in love. That's Mrs.
Doubtfire. That's better. It's kind of a better twist. That's incredible.
But then the plot really thickens when he is angered because Mrs. Doubtfire prepared meat in his home. Whoa. Yeah, they love cats.
That's great. Yeah. That is good. That is really good.
That sounds way better. I wish we didn't have to eat cows. We don't. I never thought of that.
But no, let me finish. Eating cows. I have to eat cows because it makes me strong. No, you don't.
No, I do. You really don't. There's no other substitute that makes me strong. Okay.
What about chicken? It doesn't work. It'll be so weak. It's scientifically proven.
And I'm saying if they made a fake meat or even a protein powder that had the same benefits as red meat, I would consume that instead of cows. Because I've seen, I saw a video the other day where a lady rescued a cow and it was like, not retarded, but like small and weak wout that is discriminating. It's not the same thing. We can edit that.
But anyway, we just set up a camera with like gum and tape. You think we're going to edit something out of this? That's a good point. It's like a special thing.
Yeah. That was better. I'm glad your cat doesn't speak English because you're basically just saying, I mean, I assume that's a run or this is kind of a special kind of lowrider. He's a little finks.
A lot of them come like this with a shop. He's a fan bino. Oh, it's a thing. Yeah.
I like lowrider better. He's bally's always there. He scrapes the ground. That's his answer to the show.
I've got to play that. She should learn how to bounce. He can. But yeah, she took care of the cow and the cow just thought that it was like mama and then the cow lived in the house.
And then there's like video of the cow like hanging out in the living room, getting on the couch and stuff. I guess she cleans him. So he's like not like crazy. He doesn't do like huge cow shits in the house or anything because he's like trained.
Yeah. Like a dog. Yes. And I'm like, man, I eat him.
Yeah, it's fucked up. It is fucked up. But chickens are kind of assholes and fish. You look at them in the eyes.
But could they not? But cows feel something when you look at them. When you say chickens are assholes, you could say that about people. There's some nice people out there.
Dude, have you ever looked at a chicken? You know what? You ever been to a car fight? I've got a friend that has a horse stable thing and she's friends with all the chickens and she has a special chicken.
She's got huge boobs and she puts the chicken in her huge boobs and goes to the supermarket with him. And he's a delight. Really? He's a friendly guy.
I would be too. Right. But he travels in her side by side and she rides around and he sits on the passenger seat like he's like a dog. He's really that cool.
It's pretty cool, man. I just take a bite. I just take a bite. They try to have sex with me.
Wait, what? The chicken? Have sex? I went into this big chicken coop because she was like, you want to see all my chickens?
She's like a chicken person. She's into chickens. He heavily into chickens. Has got a lot of horses.
Does she eat them? I think so. I didn't ask her but she seems like a kind of lady that eats everything. They're farm people.
They're farm people eat. Yeah, that's what it is. Right. So yes, exactly.
It is what it is. But I think she also has like these are not good eating, these are my friends. Got it. Oh, that one is very big.
I was was a big guy. Some are look-main. Some look-aggressive. But then there was a big turkey.
And he was alone turkey. And he tried to have sex with my leg. I can see that. And it was instant.
And she was like, he never does that. Like he was into me. She was a sheet. I'm okay, obviously.
Clarified that several times. Yeah. But yeah, she was into me. Sorry.
She was into me, for sure. Man, that's a nice turkey. The turkey raped you. Is that a nice turkey?
I think the turkey misunderstood my signals and thought I was like, hey, give it a go. The Weinstein defense. I always find it interesting, I defer to people who have more wisdom and more importantly more experience than I do, I think you don't meet a ton of farm people who are vegan. And so I don't think it's weird that they freak out, they have irrational feelings about being in the city, they think they're gonna get like carjacked on the tent or something and it's stupid but it's just based on the fact that that's what ignorance is, ignorance doesn't mean you're stupid, it means you lack information.
When the people on the farms are like, yeah hang out with them every day and then I slaughter them and grill the fuck out of them. Well what about horses, there's people that break horses in and then I saw a recently documentary on this old guy that he breaks horses without breaking horses, he connects with them all friendly and shit and then he makes them be good horses if you have a stallion or whatever they're wild, whatever they do, whatever they do, whatever they do, and you gotta break them in and it's pretty brutal from what I've heard and what they do. This guy did it in a way where he's not being mean to him and he was losing his business. It's brutal.
I think they whip him and stuff like that. Oh there's a lady who lost her career in, I feel like this would have come up in your feed these days, she's like a nine-time equestrian champion or something and there's a hidden camera of her whipping a horse and she's like finished. Wow. They are mean to the animal, like you gotta get them to respect you because they're big, you gotta tell them who's in charge but this guy did it in a different way and I guess nobody wanted to hire him anymore and then this is true.
The Queen of England found out about his technique, flew him to England for him to help with her horses and he did it successfully and now he's a famous guy. Is he autistic? No he's just old and he might be gay but he's pretty nice. I'm saying- But I follow him on Instagram.
You've heard about how autistic people can understand animals sometimes. Did you know that autistic people can use telepathy? That is not true. Yes it is.
Maybe they can talk to animals but I don't think they can make things move with their mind but they can make them shake a little bit. Maybe they can slide a bit on a table. No, no, no, no, no. What does telepathy do?
No, no, no, no. Here's how it goes. This is scientifically proven. You could Google it.
They had an autistic people have power. And I'm talking super autistic, not like, oh I'm slightly autistic, oh that bullshit shut up. I'm talking about- So sick of all the autistic people. I'm talking about me too.
I'm talking about full on, I can't talk, I'm a fucking tart. And they can read minds. They did a test where the mum watched shit in another room and then the autistic child wrote down what they saw or said what they saw and they did test with like hundreds of, I almost got a lot of tarts. Autistic people, 95% correct.
I don't believe that. Okay, this does the notion of telepathy. To lepathy. To lepathy and individuals with autism spectrum disorder is a misconception that has been debunked by scientific research.
There you go. Well, there's a new test because this is old. There's a documentary on it. I swear to god, everybody shut the fuck up.
I know what I'm talking about. There's a fucking horse guy who's got a documentary on how he breaks horses without being mean to him and also they recently did a test with a bunch of super autistic, not lightly. We're talking like mute, like they won't fly anywhere but Qantas motherfuckers. And they were guessing 95% correct.
They know how to speak without speaking and that's why they don't speak. Dude, that is such a leap from this guy's good with horses to autistic people at powers. This is a lot of information that I have. I'm just trying to hope.
If you want to see the video, I'd be care of this lady who with the horse, she was in a three time Olympic equestrian champion. I'd like to with her. From what's on. Oh, don't you?
She has been provisionally suspended. Because I do this, Michael. I make my horse do circles. And I have a horse.
Yeah. How many animals do you have? 12, 11. What are they?
I've got six dogs. I've got a blue healer, a Boston Terrier, a Pomeranian, three Chihuahuas. Wait, is that seven? I don't know.
No, that's six. Okay, six. And then I got three hairlas cats, one's got chubby little legs and a dragon. And a dragon?
What do you mean you got a dragon? I got a bearded dragon. Oh, bearded dragon. I'm from Australia, mate.
Really? I mean, we all are. All dragons are from Australia. So yeah, I walk a horse around and you've got a little whip thing where I crack it near him.
I hit him with it. Wait, she's just hitting him? Yep. With the girl on it.
Oh, dude. Oh, dude. Yeah, that's, yeah. Look, I'm at the ranch at least once a week.
And I see these ladies doing this. My girlfriend does this with horses. And she wins. And she wins.
She wins. She wins. She wins. She wins.
She wins. She wins. She wins. She wins.
She wins. She wins. She wins. She wins.
She wins. She wins. She wins. And you respect it.
Right. And like he's older. He's like, I don't wanna walk around. And I like go, I usually go, okay.
Yeah. And they're like you gotta get him to go. And then she was breaking in this other younger horse. And he'd go around and then he'd go and if he stopped, she cracked the whip.
No, no, it's not even a whip. It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, like a pole skinny pole with a flag on it and she cracks the flag on the ground near the horse and the horse keeps walking. And then when the horse stops, she stands in the middle and when the horse walks towards her, that's when it's, that's when it's okay to continue doing something else. But until the horse does that, she's training the horse to listen to her.
But isn't this perhaps because the horse was whipped before and you're given the horse flashbacks Well, that's I think they're just scared of a noise or think they went through some kind of whipping shit And now if they think they might get whipped maybe this is a central part of it a lot of times right like with a cat like He spray it with water a few times and now you just have to show it. Yeah exactly Yeah, exactly right if I touch the water bottle he'll stop doing what I used to do What was the problem spray? He was a people's food off the table man. What did it?
Yeah, it doesn't care The other last night we had a cat tried to eat a cookie out of my hand. How do you hand? Yeah? That's I'm eating it that shows how much they respect you no respect me because I'm a pushover I don't like me mean.
I'm an animal person. I really like him. That's the thing my horse I'm like super I'm just like a good friend to him and I don't like everyone else does the thing with the whip I just I just go come with me and I need to work out too. So I do circles and he follows me and everybody there It's like that's like how you do it.
I'm like, I don't care. That's how I do it. The horse is never gonna learn. That's okay Yeah, well, it's not a horse like if he was a stallion then maybe different but this guy's like 23.
He's got a bad hip He's had his patties dudes. Yeah, let him live. He had a person that wasn't around taking care of him He's haves all dread and stuff. I took care of him and now he gets like too many apples and all kinds of treats And I want to and if he wants to if he doesn't want me to ride him because I feel like sometimes he kind of gives me that vibe And I just I go then just walk or about it Sometimes he's like let's go and I go alright and that's usually I could tell by riding him lately like if he's not I didn't do it.
It's not that I'm like, yeah, that'll do it just do like five minutes But sometimes he's like oh, let's go. Oh my hell. Yeah, I let it get up on him bare back without a step How you jump and lay on your belly on their back and then you it's cold of what would they call it? Wait perpendicular on behind.
That's on the side Okay, I just run and jump into a split. Yeah, that was all that was old me Yeah, I come from the side now I land on the belly like you know when they carry a dead person on the horse Yeah, like that and then you fish kick fish kick and then you flick your leg over and get on wow You ever try and do it just keeps you like moves first time I ever did it And I recently fed him in this other horse apples and I cut the tips of my fingers off because I was a brand new knife I didn't realize how bad it was so I ripped my shirt off and made bandages for my fingers And then my girlfriend rode her horse bare back past me and I was like that seems cool And she kind of disappeared a little bit and I was like I'll just get on mine like that and he didn't really know me So when I jumped on he just took off by the time I got on I fell off and I landed in the bushes blood everywhere He came over and was like you good and then and then he let me ride him doesn't hurt your nuts right horse Nah, but that's the same I feel like that's the same as Moto like when you ride dirt bikes You got to be like up on the tank and you're like I put my shit up in front of me So if it went down in between my legs and I sat down on it hell yeah But I wear like compression shorts, so when I put my stuff up it stays up there Oh, so you're not sure kind of hovering I bring them up I bring them up with everything because if it goes down in between your legs And you sit on it for short all right that's how I rode a horse It was I didn't I didn't like I would make my balls and you had a saddle on I did have a saddle yeah Yeah, you balls cuz if you have like loose box of shorts your balls can sneak down Yeah, yeah, I think my maybe my I can't remember I'm just been so long I don't remember but the shorts I was wearing but I remember not enjoying it due to the ball feelings How many times do you think you've been hitting the balls in your life hit in the ball I just had a no had a ball injury a blow to the very few I'm always scared of like Sitting on my balls. Yeah, no, I think that's a good thing to be scared on I have never done that and I'm very happy with that, but um, you know I haven't had any serious nut injuries I would say have you taken like a skateboard straight to the nuts? Oh, yeah, that's horrible Yeah, the worst one ever is I was when I was in school.
I was on stage It was it was PE sports and there was like Matt's I don't know what we're doing but I was talking to somebody on the stage and I stepped off the stage with one foot no So I dropped and caught the the edge of the stage right in the in the taint. Oh fuck it It didn't it didn't hurt a ball it hit a ball as well, but it the impact cut my tank open I had a vagina. Oh my god. Yeah, but like not the right spot.
Did they do you need strict stitches? No? Thank goodness. It was just like a it's like a gash.
Yeah, you're temporary hermaphrodism Yeah, I was on the streets. I could have been a prostitute And that sounds terrific. Yeah, what's pretty hard? I can't be got to do all this crazy shit And I was just from standing on stage and not looking out.
Oh those are the worst ones, man I feel like all this like the crazy stunts I've done where I got a little bit hurt And then there's one's where it's like I drunk and I fell down a cliff Piss Was really bad Usually because usually when you do stunts you wear protective gear Yeah, which is like people like people always shit I mean if I ever post stuff where I'm not wearing a helmet and people on Instagram below put a home and on I'm like man I I put a helmet on when it's necessary and it's like oh, yeah You don't think you think you're good enough in this and I'm like if I'm doing little things where I know I can get out of it Yeah, I am good enough. I'm not when I push it I put a helmet on what about Ian finance riding a bike through New York Hold the filming several one-handed smoking his egg right with the helmet Well, he's it he's it almost said he's an idiot Just he thinks a lot of things at the same time So sometimes other things that were necessary to think don't pop in there I mean, it's just I feel like I'm gonna watch him die It's just a matter of time because I used to always like you always say like you never see what is it? You ever see a baby squirrel, but obviously they it's like a baby squirrel like all the people that you see doing insane Jaywalking in Manhattan you're like and yet somehow everybody's fine Nobody gets hit and I've said that people who are like EMTs or date Do you know they literally drive around all day scraping people off the street? You just don't see it because there's so many intersections people are dying to every time all the time I told him to drop in at Tony's And he dropped in on this codo pipe which was way above his level and he made it And then we had to do another podcast and he goes as a cool if I keep skating and I go yeah But as he leaves I go hey, hey, he's trying not to look at me and I'm like look at me I'm turning I go take it easy and he goes.
Yeah. Yeah. He's got no shirt on I see him skating out there. I finished the podcast go out.
Where's Ian? He's in the parking lot in his car smoking a cigarette I go out my what's going on and he comes out like I'm like what you do And he's like I fell trying to drop in I'm like wait you try to drop in again without me Yeah, I thought I had it he did separate his shoulder Jesus and then like a week later or maybe two weeks He's in a car crash now. I rolled like two times. I heard about that and right like really wrecked himself.
Yeah, it's a it's bad news Yeah, we're both like equally dumb. That's what we're doing a twitch. We're trying to do a twitch thing now We're both gonna do card together and start a twitch channel and both of us Can't make it work like let it know play the game. We're buying things constantly.
That's like it says you gotta get this You gotta get that and we're getting stuff. He called me today. Hey, I got this camera I got this other thing and if it wasn't hard why is it why don't I see my car to get it? We're not gamers like people I posted that I'm starting and people like I'll get this remote do this thing It'll make your thing faster to my kid yeah, it's okay I got it doesn't even out of turn the fucking thing on remember when you were a kid and stuff was really easy for you and your parents are like Yeah, I could but I still think there's must be like a fucking YouTube where you watch it I fucking miss I'll be a total boomer here I miss when the internet would just have instructions for things rather than watch my videos subscribe to my stuff It is unbelievable How many videos there are that will tell you how to do anything and how none of them actually tell you how to do a Goddamn thing you know you're a fucking 15 minutes to realize they don't fucking know yeah instructions you can scan and go Okay, no, there's speaking like oh no this video isn't about exactly they're talking about this not that we have replaced a system that Work perfectly well with something that is absolute dog shit Totally some Swedish guy who sits in front of a screen all day can get clicks Yeah, that's the other thing if it's a Swedish guy first he goes don't forget to like my and by the time he's said all that I'm no longer listening right because one he's Swedish and two I don't fuck your channel You know tell me how to turn the fucking thing on your dick head Yeah, and it's five minutes of like don't forget to like it fucking like subscribe this you fucking you Right shit head yeah, they're really just they just drone on and on and I think we're getting teaching is a skill like explaining something And saying how to do something is not you know what I mean?
I'm watching these videos. It looks good They got a bunch of views. I'm like sure they know how to do it Yeah, exactly what they're talking about something to do I've like I watched I'm trying to learn some stuff about AI stuff now And like I'm realizing halfway through like he's like this is the main way to do it He's the title is to use this program is like you could also use this program I'm like oh you're getting paid by this other program to do so you make a tutorial about this one But really selling this other one and that's all this whole video is you know what I mean? You don't actually know what you're doing so you're gonna AI a lot No, just my idea is to start start learning about it.
I just just why yesterday why? Because I want to I need to start pushing myself on social media more and I have all these um kind of big ideas that aren't good for Social media, but I'm thinking maybe with AI I can like make things way easier like I can you know you can shoot sketches and stuff Like that yeah, perhaps or something like that yeah my girlfriend's been teaching me about it Yeah, like think like to promote comedy shows which I'll show you struggle with too I'm like I keep trying to do stunts and I'm getting hurt and I'm like I didn't really sell any tickets and I can barely walk Yeah, surely there's gonna be another angle. Yeah, my girlfriend asked what is it? Chat GPT.
Yeah, I think what should I do that doesn't involve me skateboarding or fighting and it was like he could sing Salt which is why I was gonna work on a country song. He should sing a country song or he could ask people hey I told you to sing that country song. Yeah, well, I haven't I haven't finished it yet. Yeah, I just do whatever that tells I do what anyone tells me to do But yeah, I don't know I just feel like if we have to all I feel bad for I feel bad for the artists and animators and all the things that AI will Will we'll get rid of by the same time?
I feel bad for myself. I'm gonna be my own production studio for everything just to have a Decent business doing stand up so I try to do without all that for 20 years 20 plus years So now I'm gonna try and do it with it We'll see what happens I'm just getting into it It's gonna be crazy for you to because I feel like watching you do stand up you're one of those people that I'm like I try not to pay too much attention because it'll make me not want to be a stand up comedian Why because you got so many jokes in a row you want like David tell where you just go bang bang bang bang bang and I'm like holy shit Dude different styles. Yeah, it's a style that I don't feel You know like you said you've been doing it for 20 years Okay, maybe in 20 years I could be that style but right now my I tell funny stories and I try to find the joke in the funny story That's my angle. Yeah yours.
It's different is is Disheartening because I'm like oh my god. How do you remember that? I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm a you did a show with David tell and you did 20 minutes and I'm like you've got more You can just keep going like that you got a special and I'm like man How do you keep? Making those little ones and with the tags and then go to the next one that blends into the one before it is just oh It's so much which brings me to you do all that then promoting on social media.
That's another job. Yeah, yeah I know like I don't know to me like going on the road making a video And they're like if you post here and then you do that and if you do it at this time And then you boost it in this area where you're going and Facebook and Instagram and all the thing and I'm like okay What about the joke? Yeah? It's my time to write the job sure sure I mean I don't get it I don't get it everyone's but apparently everyone else is able to balance it and I'm the one with a problem I don't think you're the only one I mean, but I don't know I feel like everyone else is a problem everyone else is a Five podcasts and I find those eight different things and they're all fine and so I can't do it I'm dying I feel better.
Yeah, I'm like doing all the podcasts and doing all this stuff and going on the road because on the road Is the other thing when you're in your fifties and you get up early and you get on a plane and you tell them to jokes You stay up late you get up early and go home and then you have five podcasts. I'm dying dude That's a lot man. It's like I hear you. I also like I love I love traveling actually and I love doing Santa But just this year maybe I just hit 45 or something like that It's like I just I'm a I never bothered me all of a sudden It's like man This is wearing me out like I have a bunch of energy as I used to that's that's I think you hit the nail on the head with When you said the number 45.
Yeah, that's when things got a little bit harder for me like I like I like I train I like boxing and Skating and sometimes I'll skate for two hours and it's not that it's not the next day It's the day after that and if I skate and then I go on the road And it's like I usually work out before I to a set and like when I was in Arizona this week I was like I'm not going anywhere. I'm just sitting there and I'm like, okay, I got 45 minutes I'm just gonna sit here. Yeah, 45 minutes. It's so hard to adapt to it You know, I've always wanted to I have this big I'm like kind of a I'm a big music guy and I always thought if I was like I don't know some kind of a Student or something I write a paper about on streaks and music You know like a Bob Dylan is like you know like six classic albums or the or you know Or like a Stephen Wonder has like that range in this from the 60s 70s where it's like five albums in a row That is amazing and now Stephen one is still around and he's not really making the stuff on the same level anymore I want to start like outcast same thing and I want to study why and I'm like What's the why why they have these streaks?
Why is it like and now I realize people just get tired? They are tired they're older and they cannot do as much it's just impossible I thought Bob Dylan's right good songs because the devil gave him the songs Remembering it's no that's not Robert Johnson, but he's really invented that theory. Yeah, I think Bob Dylan is from that elk He'll kill because I tried I tried Gave it a go and I failed but I think he said it once in an interview like when you wrote this song Because apparently he wrote a song in a couple minutes one of the one of the bigger ones Yeah, and he was like that was just one of those days where I Forgot what he called it, but that they gave it to me and he's like who gave it to you and he's like the You know, I don't know what word he didn't say demon He didn't say devil, but it was pretty obvious that he was referring to nothing to muse the muse it's a muse No, because I know that word that's not even well, you know, you know, he looked in minutes ago Fuck both you guys. I like no gal here from oasis He talked about he's a great example of somebody who had a run and then it just stopped And he's well and he will not even kid you he knows that he's probably never gonna write another great song But he said he said but I'm still out there fishing every day He goes because every day the gods or whatever he said drop a couple down And if you got your fishing line you could be the one who's lucky to pull it up But if you're too busy getting a blowjob or doing drugs or doing interview about how great Rob was 20 years ago You're never gonna case I have no guarantee that I'm gonna catch the fish But I know I won't if I'm not out there with my fishing line So I'm out there every day with my guitar and I'm strumming and I'm doing all the things he's like Because I remember because because Bono's already caught fucking too many so He's not getting out there I'm gonna fucking catch it.
It's a really interesting way of looking at it It's a metaphor, but I know what he's saying What is also you saying though? Like you know you miss every shot you don't take it? Yeah sure if you're not trying you don't get it But also like god, it's gotta be like yeah I mean I don't know I just feel like the whole even the idea of these like late like even with Dylan I tried to listen to those later albums I was like these later ones are great too and I'm like are they not really yeah So we're the late Neil Young album. Yeah, it's like they're like a little bit better than the shitty ones Have you heard then you young because he had a comeback in the 90s because I had a bunch of bands were named dropping and Pearl Jam and all that He made an album that got nominated for a little young is back.
There's a song on a called piece of crap Dude, he's like I went out and bought a blender took it on plug it in turn out was a piece of crap It's just fucking that oh wow that's the song what about stop the fire. That was a steamy pile. That was a hit Billy Joel Yeah, I like that song see People say a lot of stuff any other time. Do you like where people say I was on the way here.
I was in a genius of love barely singing. You know, yeah, I love that Yeah, yeah, the G21 was like don't I don't know what's another song I like to say a bunch of shit. That's all the shit you don't do You read how chili peppers fan I I do like the chili peppers. I feel like it's my one like you know It's a pleasure.
I would say I like them. I like them. I think they're great. It's some people don't know music That's why nickel back are famous and rich.
I feel like and this is this is from a music snob perspective I feel like chili peppers like just a step up from sublime for some people which I know people love sublime But I'm just saying like some people think they're really corny. I think talk about runs I mean I would put the chili peppers there for having like Five great albums like in a row pretty much or maybe more, you know, that's me. So I don't like I like to you What I thought you were great. Oh, I feel right now what chili peppers are the worst.
No way they're really bad Oh, that was going on. I was like the energy shifted Like lyrics like scabadom bone but thing good don't think don't you like that part? No, I hate that part Oh, thanks me angry. I make someone a punch innocent people in the face But don't bow but beep up come on Come on.
I'm not gonna come on. I never come on. No. I never scared around my good a bit of him.
Maybe no, I don't do it Maybe there's my lyrics best band with a questionable singer. How about that now we could have a Bob Dylan. That's very questions Well, I think he never said he was a good singer though. I don't think he does ever claim to you as an amazing vocalist Did he I don't think so but they never do that part of the song where they slow it down.
He's like No, he knew chili was guy thinks he's a vocalist. He's the worst vocalist I've ever seen live. It's amazing Frushati's dope. You don't think he's a good guitar player.
Wait the guy that died. No the guy who lived the guy almost died John Frushati the guy who's like a guitar. Oh, yeah, he was pretty good He is good. Please not good.
Yeah, oh god that hurt. It's flee not good Yeah, he's good Things like you can be talented and accomplished and still make shitty stuff. I think Celine's Dion I was marveling at cuz I'm partial to What is it? Oh, holy night?
It's just I was raised in the church and it's just that if you are a fucking talented singer You lay into that note. I get chills. It's fucking corny, but it's true and I came on I was gonna skip and I was like hold on fucking Celine Dion's music sucks, but she is an incredible fucking singer I want to hear her name saying and that's not what I'm saying about the chili peppers. I'm saying you're saying that you're tasteful I'm saying I don't even know if they're tasteful I mean they've like oh they have also have great songs like they do have great songs What about California my god?
What about also if you as two people who moved to California once you live in California? I got to do with it. You could say I could write ten songs about the state. It's an amazing state I'm gonna make it here.
Is that make it great? No, it doesn't make it great the vistas the food the people it's an amazing State I can write I can write a double about it. I could write three albums about California This is hurting, but when he did the love song about being a junkie under a bridge. Yes, that's pretty good song Yeah, but he can't sing it live and that should be that that should mean something Prince if he sings it live It's even better than it was on the album and that's the caliber that exists So when you're down here making as much money as Prince, you're an asshole.
You know happy for you But you suck if you think you're angry now watch this Prince is exactly what you're saying. I respect the incredible amount of talent. He can do so many things They're so good. I hate 80 synth.
I can't get past the sound of the I can't I hate the splash symbols. I fucking hate that shit. It all sounds corny to me It sounds like I agree. It's you know a lot of it like st.
They though the funky your song sound like oh, this is like weak Parliament I like how Parliament sounds you don't know that kind of I don't like I mean like even even like his outfits are like the kind of Aslas chaps is the future of pants the fucking talking about the gusto to be like here's my butt shakes I'm gonna be like what about it. He plays every instrument dude. It's amazing if the talent is it's what you say It's like I can't say that he's not one of the most talented people if not the one yeah, maybe most yeah But I just don't like the music that I think you're allowed to you by the way I think you are he's so different We listed the top 20 greats in like the pop rock era He's different from every other one because yeah He's 80s and it's armbic he never wrote songs about like that's just the way it is or you know He wrote songs about like let's dance and then fuck like that sure he's the best that ever was and probably ever will be at that But I think you can say that's just not my cup of tea. Yeah, it's fine.
I look I like I like that is sick He's a it is better than Janelle Monet's who's that she's the lady who's wearing the same outfit Oh, well, well, she's a pussy. She's got a flap to cover it. He was the whole time Here's my ass so that's how it's turned to that ones to him that was not a good idea for you Did not have an ass that you should expose to anybody I mean that's Princess I know I'm not don't have a part of the painting with the prince name But I just think it's just and I like all kinds of music I just don't like a prince for some I think I think as a comedian There's these people that are huge in comedy and I want to share anybody I'm not gonna say names But there's people that have made it with super social media has given them the spoost and youtubers that are doing Shows and selling out around the world and their stand-up is dog shit sure. Okay, maybe not dog shit, but compared to Easy for me because you know, I'm so well David tell sure I had pizza with him after a show He was he was better when we're ever pizza than people that sell out like hundreds of thousands of seats And I think because they've got a big TikTok audience or or their YouTube channels big They're not that great at comedy sure and the chili peppers have made some I was even metallic it did an I'm Italian my favorite band when Metallica started when they were live they weren't that great the album that they orchestrated was Amazing and whoever produced ride the lightning was fucking incredible But when they did ride the lightning when they were like 19 year olds It was pretty shit like that like you're cooking or whatever or a famous name Whatever they were shredding but it was a little off James's voice was was really bad in a lot of the live stuff that I've heard and then Later on in life with the black album and after the black album when they did load and reload which I thought were terrible albums I watched them perform live and I was like when they did the ride the lightning album It was the best version I've ever heard where I was like Jesus these guys are fucking incredible Yeah, and that to me is I don't the hype means nothing to me It makes me angry if anything where the masses go oh, I love so it's so because he's hilarious I'm like he is basic as fuck like the real talent when someone grabs a mic and goes when he comes to comedy You're like oh my god that like I have Tim Dillon at the comedy store I'm like I'm pretty sure 15 minutes there was not anything He just was like I got this and I got that about anybody in the crowd and I'm like this is brilliant He's a brilliant comedian and then there's some other turkey that everyone goes oh my god It's so and so and he's a dog shit.
It was it was terrible It was a bad set and he's a legend so there's a girl that I saw recently who's a legend She's a cunt but she's a legend and her set sucked dogs nuts, but she's a legend and everybody was like oh my god She's here. That's great and good for you but if it was like you were nobody you came up you're like dude get the fuck off What are you saying like this bullshit? Well you're saying they get a free ride because they're famous or you saying that because it's an or an ex that everyone likes Yeah, maybe that's true. That's true But it would look like a prince like you might not like the albums But if you because you do know talent when you see it undeniable talent and when you see you live You can't see him live anymore But if you did see him live now any song he did if you were there near him you'd be like oh my god And then have the chili peppers play a song right before or after you'd be like oh wow It's like two different sports.
I could see that. I went to the Paisley Park, you know his house Oh wow yeah, you're recording complex. Yeah, you can just How do you feel? I hate him.
I'm a music fan. I just go I'm assuming you were there for work and so went and Rome right yeah, yeah, exactly you didn't make up you didn't make a pilgrimage. Yeah. Yeah, what else you can do Many apples it's like the one thing to do Minneapolis.
Yes, so I'm there and I see it I see a picture I walk by a picture of him. I swear to god my instant thought I look at the picture I'm like I think this guy wants to fuck me like I felt that from a picture of a dead person Do you mean that level of charisma? Yeah, like made me feel like whoa this is kind of like I'm feeling things weird if you You're not gay. No him and David Bowie if you hook up and they were alive Obviously otherwise you'd be weird, but if they were live you're not gay in my opinion because tell he's not gay and he would have sex with David Bowie sure I think he's gay pre pre pre new teeth or post Doesn't matter those teeth are Okay, no, let's see what was Bowie's most fuckable era cuz I think it was a bad thing there I'm interested.
I'm honestly not a bit interested in fucking sick. He started I am The time of the weeker. He looks yes. He looks like a week exactly.
He's too skinny. He's teeth are fucked up man Oh, that's good. That's good. That's good.
I do. That's good in bad energy right there I like him better because hair sure I think I'm more of like a A lot of ladies is ridiculous like a china girl Yeah, man, yeah, what is it? At the end if he wasn't so old he like grew out of lions mane He's like I'm the king of rock and roll and I'm gonna look like the king of it was amazing that guy I wanna fuck See my mom is my mom is short red hair So I'm not into that era. Yeah, that looks like half my friends mom's yeah There you go.
Look at that. Look at that. Yeah, I mean I mean those eighties little fun I'm not even into who he the look. I'm into having sex with a god That I'll go one further.
So that we just saw the long hair photo I saw my glass and berry towards the end and it was so regal cool. Here's the gay thing I've ever said he hooked up in the early 80s is on the record with Tina Turner. Yeah, cool. If I'd been in the room and had my choice.