Lyrics That Kept Me Here

A lot of vets say music is the only thing that still makes sense, and for Tony Kessel, that idea runs deep. He built a 366-song playlist of his life, wrote the story tied to each track, and found himself looking at a full account of growing up in a foster home, serving in the Army National Guard, and working through suicidal thoughts. With more than two decades in uniform, he talks about being raised by a Vietnam veteran NCO, commissioning as an officer, and learning to lead while valuing the experience that NCOs bring. Music runs through all of it, from Garth Brooks and old country to heavy metal and the tracks that shaped the post-9/11 years. Our conversation covers how music served as both a coping tool and a warning sign, why non-combat deployments can still weigh on you, and how suicide intervention training pushed him to speak openly about his lowest points. We get into the shock of coming home from Kuwait or Afghanistan almost overnight, the support he has offered other vets, and why simply sitting with someone who is struggling matters. Tony also shares how he is using his home studio and writing to reach people who think they are carrying their pain alone. Timestamps 00:06:30 Tony's wide musical background and how different genres shaped his life. 00:09:45 The late-night drive after drill that sparked the 366 song playlist. 00:18:30 Using music to cope, the risks of relying on it to numb pain, and the moment he knew he had to face things directly. 00:26:30 Suicide intervention training, opening up about suicide attempts, and why sharing his story matters. 00:31:30 Returning home too fast after deployment and how that sudden shift affects veterans. Links & Resources Veteran Suicide & Crisis Line: Dial 988, then press 1 Website: https://dualistmedia.com Follow Tony Kessel on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/dualistmedia Follow Tony Kessel on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dualistmedia Follow Tony Kessel on Twitter/X: https://www.twitter.com/dualistmedia Transcript View the transcript for this episode.